To make the children change schools again.

[Peaches2566]

I escaped domestic violence after being kicked out if my home by my ex with my children. 9 and 12 I have been placed in a hostel I'm another town. I had to change the kids schools when this happened.

I have now found somewhere to live private rent through the council but it means changing schools again. There is nothing suitable for rent in this town and most likely won't be. It's a small town. My kids are so angry and upset at moving schools again and my mum has said I'm the asshole for accepting the property.

I just don't know what to do! It doesn't matter if I wait for council or private rent I will not get housing here. I feel like an emotional punch bag for everything right now and I'm just trying to fix what their dad caused.

It's not ideal but that's life. Move then build in structure and work hard on helping them make connections. Enrol in scouts/guides/cadets, a sport etc so that they feel part of the area don't just rely on school for friends and connection

I'm so sorry you are having such an awful time.

Ultimately, they will settle and hopefully this move will be permanent. It is surely better for them to move school and have a personal home rather than being in the hostel.

I assume there is no way you can move house but keep them at their current schools.

As for your mum, perhaps ask her what she thinks the alternative should be!

Ah at that age they're bound to kick off. Lots of change for them at a time when they're getting annoyingly good at asserting themselves! But they'll adapt and you don't really have a choice anyway.

Well done for getting out of an abusive relationship. Don't let your DM treat you badly either.

The children have been through a lot by the sounds of things, of course they are upset at more change. But you e been through a lot too and it sounds like you are doing your best for you all. They are too young to see the big picture (and your mum can't either for whatever reason) a stable home of your own is the most important here. Help them settle, facilitate seeing old friends too where you can, and they will be fine. Good luck x

I think you need to do it if this will be their permanent home.

It's not ideal but there's not much else you can do so unfortunately it's one of those shit times where someone, in this case the kids, has to just suck it up as there is no alternative.

Well done on getting out of the relationship. I'm sure in years to come they will understand the reasons but for now allow them to be annoyed but reiterate there's nothing you can do to change the situation.

I'd also look at taking a step back from your mum she sounds like a bit of a twat to be honest and someone you don't need around you right now.

Your mum sounds incredibly unsupportive. Well done on having escaped DV and doing your best for your kids.

Take the rented property. They will settle at the new school and as long as you are in a hostel you can't easily move on with life as it will feel temporary.

Hope things work out.

Your mum is the Asshole for turning the blame to you. Put her straight. You are doing what you are doing for the good of your family. Move the kids, they will get over it. Gain the stability you so desperately need.