To still use a car seat for my 10 year old?

[ExcitedButNervous0424]

My son has recently turned 10 and still uses a high backed booster.

When I mentioned this to my friend the other day, whose son is a few months younger than mine, she practically laughed and said she can’t believes I still put my 10 year old in a car seat.

My son is always asking why he still has to use one as apparently, to quote him: “none of my friends do” but it’s always been non-negotiable for me. I always thought he was exaggerating when he said that none of his friends use car seats anymore (not even backless boosters) but judging from my friend’s reaction its made me wonder whether my son is actually right.

My friend said to think about how much I must be embarrassing my son when he has to use a HBB when his friends don’t use anything, but surely car safety isn’t about just letting him do what his friends do?

What’s the norm? Because her reaction really surprised me.

I have a very small 10 year old (nearer 11 now) who's just gone over 135cm so I've said they don't need the booster anymore. They might have stayed in the HBB till now but it didn't fit in our car (got it 2 years ago) as the head rests can't be removed. The only option was to buy a very expensive car manufacturer one which I wasn't prepared to do.

Going by 150 my mum should be in one...

DTs hit the 135in Y6 so they came out then.

Yes heads get thrown forward if the impact occurs at the front or back of the car, but in my friend’s case someone crashed into the side of her car.

YANBU but bear in mind that my (fairly tall) just 8 year old is 132cm so by 10 he’ll be out of a booster seat (DS1, 11, Y6 is 5’5”…). So what his friends are doing may reflect that!

My child is 10 and a half.
I think she's 131cm.
Only just put her in a backless booster.

I believe from what I understand a child can be in a HBB till min of 135cm but it's fine to stay till 150cm - the seatbelts are designed for adults not children - I know some adults can be 150cm tall but their bones have matured more.

Ignore your friend and do what works for you and your family, my twins are 4 and still RF which works for our family

Going by the comments on here I should be in a HBB which obviously isn't going to happen

Your son is very short for his age. Has he always been so short?

YANBU to put him in a car seat as he is still below the legal requirements but yes, I expect your friend is right and he is embarrassed about it.

I’m under 150cm and id like an adult booster! The seat belt cuts into my neck. It’s set on the lowest setting and is still not right.

I’ve always thought that there’s a point where it moves from being about safety to being about parent anxiety & over protectiveness.

Yes most European countries are so anxious and protective of their citizens children that they made these laws to show the parents that they are not anxious and over protective. Nothing to do with road safety, all to do with the mental health of their citizens.

I don't care about what's cool with his friends or what other people do, my child's safety is paramount to me and for that reason he's in a car seat until he's either 12 or well over 135cm.

Seat belts aren't even designed for the average woman never mind a child. I'm 5'6" and some seat belts still cut into my neck. So YADNBU @ExcitedButNervous0424

My 10 year old is still in one. He’s almost 135 cm though so won’t be for much longer. None of his friends are but they’re a lot taller than him x

Dd is extraordinarily small. She stayed in a HBB until the start of secondary school. We still kept one for long trips after that, partly for comfort because the belt placement really was better. We took it out of the car for school drop-off and pick-up and for any rides around town with friends though because we were trying to balance social issues.

she is driving now and we had to be sure to get her a car that she could reach the pedals and see out the window. She could still easily fit in a HBB, so you do have to move them at some point.

I have just this very morning unclipped our high back boosters. I have a 10yo and a very tall 8yo and they only came out because I didn't realise how squashed they were 🤣 They're both comfortably over 135cm.

Car seats gave always been non-negotiable, although we do now have booster cushions in my other car which will stay as it makes the belt fit properly until they're 150cm.

I DGAF if it's 'uncool' and I really don't get the rush to get them out of cars seats. I'm not risk averse, but if anything happened because of some other dickhead on the road, I'd want a clear conscience that I'd done all I could to keep them safe.

When I take other people's (tiny) kids they invariably moan they don't need a booster but it's my car my rules and you're precious cargo - buckle up!

Just follow the law - if he should still be in one at 132cm, then keep him in one. I agree that some people seem very keen to move out of car seats and I was shocked at how fast some people I know did it.

Having said that, don’t be dismissive of the ‘friends’ factor. It’s a big deal to be laughed at at that age, at any age in fact. If he wants to be dropped off round the corner or something because he’s embarrassed, then accommodate that.

My son is 10 and over 135cm and we have only just switched to booster at his request, he wanted nothing but despite being over 135cm the seat belt still wasn't sitting right across his chest without it. Kept with HBB for as long as we did after watching a harrowing video of the difference between a booster and HBB on a child in a crash.

Booster seats are still recommended up to 150cm FYI, 135cm is the minimum and you should still check the seat belt position (we were able to remove the child seat sooner from our KA than our Focus). I believe other countries have stricter rules than us.

We live within walking distance to his school so it’s never an issue in that sense.

It only becomes apparent if I’m collecting a friend of his from somewhere (in my car) or another mum is driving my son somewhere for example as then the car seat issue can’t be avoided.

There are 2 things going on here.
One in the legal requirement of under 135cm & under 12yrs old should be in a carseat.
The other is the fit of the adult seat belt.
https://thecarseatlady.com/the-5-step-test-your-way-to-know-if-a-child-can-ride-safely-without-a-booster/

This is a really good guide as to if they are physically bug enough to fit the seats. Both mine were closer to 150cm before no booster was actually comfortable - and it happened about 6 months later in my car than DHs due to seat shape.

Mine aren't tall, and were in HBB til about 147cm (when their shoulders became uncomfortable), then a booster cushion of 6/9 months until the carseat fitted and was comfortable. Probably around 11 or 12 years old.

Everyone’s fine with no car seat - until they’re not! How anyone would be able to live with themselves with a severely injured or dead child, because they couldn’t be bothered to use a car seat, is beyond me. How many of those parents don’t use a seat belt?

my child will be rear facing until 36kg/approx age 7 then in a decent high backed booster until 150cm. I don’t know why you wouldn’t want to give you child the best shot in an accident. Over anxious would be never getting in a car, not taking the best precautions.

Depends on the size but judging by the height of children now I'm not surprised they out of car seats. My 7 year old is of course still in a seat but several of her taller friends aren't. Shes year 3 so some are 8 almost 9. One of her friends is taller than me and I'm an advantage height

I voted YABU but then read down and saw that your child is under 135cm and then I changed my vote to YANBU!

I would tell my child that we will not be breaking the law just because they or their friends think it’s uncool.

Ask them “Shall we go out shoplifting too, if people says it’s uncool not to?”

I’d rather have an embarrassed child than an injured (or dead) child.

What is the point of buying a different style of booster seat? My son is about 147cm, nearly 10, and still in a high backed seat, although I will probably remove it soon as he is approaching the 150cm limit.