Nursery hair dilemma

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2 year old dd has wild corkscrew curls. They grow up rather than down so her total hair length is only collar bone when dry (half way down her back when wet). It does tend to get in her face so every day before nursery I will plait it back/ do pigtails/ buns/ pony tail/ clips- various styles to move it back from her face- using soft bobbles and snap hair clips. I’m assuming that throughout the day it must work loose as every time she comes back from nursery it seems to have been tightly braided into intricate plaits that are bound with a small cheap plastic bobbles that I cannot get out of her hair as they are wound in so much. I am sick of spending 15 mins each evening battling an angry toddler/ trying to pick her hair out so we can bathl her. AIBU to ask the nursery to either leave her alone or tie it loosely back in the nice soft bobbles have sent her in with?

I sympathise op but I've got the opposite "problem"...

At my dd's nursery the manager discourages the staff from playing with kids' hair because, she says, "it's better to respect their personal space". This is fab especially for my dd because she doesn't like being touched and hugged much.

But it means she comes home with her hair like a bird's nest everyday because hair bobbles just slip out eventually. Usually with bits of food and paint in it. And she's caught headlice twice. She hates having her hair washed or combed but we have to do it way more often than I'd like because of the state it gets into.

So I almost wish someone would plait it for her! Tbf she'd probably not stay still long enough to let them.

Disposable hair bands/small elastics are by far the most effective for kids hair that won’t stay “done” (been there, got t-shirt and all associated clothing) so I am not surprised nursery are using them. You chop them out with scissors. I suggest you try them - will really help the style last just google elastic hair bands and look for tiny ones.

Just cut her hair short until she's older ? It really doesn't sound worth the agro. 15 minutes crying and pain a night. If she was a boy she wouldn't have to suffer this. She's 2, she won't care about her hair for another 3 years

Speak to them. At our nursery, there was something about not using clips and bobbles that would fall out because it was a safety risk - if they fell out and another child put in their mouth. I can’t remember exactly as this was a long time ago. Anyway, I vaguely remember there being some similar issue that my child would go in with her hair done one way, and then they’d redo it with a different thing that wouldn’t fall out. They didn’t talk to me about it until I asked I think - they were too busy to think of talking to me about it as it was NBD to them.

I use those little elastics with my daughters, they are the only ones that last all day. I use a drop of oil to magically break them but snipping them works the same. It doesn’t damage their hair and my girls have never complained it hurts them. One of mine has curlier hair and I use a little gel and water to help the style last all day. My curly girls hair always lasts alot longer than my girl with silky straight hair, but save all the pretty bobbles and hair clips for home!

I’m sure the nursery meant well. Is your problem just the elastics or would you rather they not touch her hair at all?

A few years ago, DH had picked DD1 up from nursery to come straight to hospital to meet her new baby sister, I remember waiting thinking that her hair was going to be such a mess as DH had dropped her off at nursery in a rush that morning… but one of her nursery teachers had taken the time to do her hair so beautifully that I cried when I saw her and the pictures of her meeting her sister are just so lovely and I was so thankful for them.

I sympathise with this but if the only reason they're having an issue is because of nursery doing her hair too tight then it's not really reasonable that OP feels she has to cut it off when it's them causing the issue. Assuming child is otherwise fine and happy getting hair done normally like.

I've taken your approach in general though, my DD is 5 and has always had short hair (either a bob or pixie cut) but that's because she hated anything to do with it (washing/brushing/wouldn't wear anything in it etc). I can appreciate that lots of other kids don't mind that stuff though so less necessary to keep it short.