32, never had a relationship, feel like such a weirdo.

[RideAWhiteSwan1]

I'm 32 and have never had a relationship. I'm also a single parent to my lovely DS (9yo) who was conceived from a one night stand. I feel embarrassed tbh and pretty lonely at times. All my friends/siblings etc have had multiple long term relationships, and I've not even had a brief one. Is there something wrong with me? I do get male attention, I'm also a nice person and I know I'm not unattractive. It's just not happened yet, will it ever :(

Its a little unusual but i don't think you're a weirdo. Plus if you've been a single parent for 9 years that will have limited your opportunity to meet nice men and develop a relationship. If you were 23 when you had DC, I didn't have my first proper relationship until i was about that age and so did a lot of my friends but you were busy being single mum.
You aren't a weirdo and it will happen for you.

Not weird at all, honestly. I know a good few people your age and older who have never had a relationship. I understand why you feel it's weird, but I promise you it isn't!

I certainly wouldn't say you're weird, you just haven't met the right person to spark your interest. Obviously having a DC does limit meeting people from the point of view of childcare, but if you feel you'd like a relationship just being chatty (not necessarily flirting), when you know you're around single/divorced men, joining clubs/taking up hobbies when your DC is a bit older, will open up your world a bit more (although there might be day time things going on locally).

Thank you everyone x

I honestly wouldn’t feel upset about it. The amount of liars and cheaters seem to be multiplying by the day and everyone I know that’s in a relationship are unhappy. I’m single by choice and I sleep very well at night not stressing over what someone else is doing behind my back, not having someone to argue with etc! X

I don't think it's that unusual, i had a,relationship between the ages of 17-19
But was single for most of my 20,s bar flings and a couple of 3-6 month relationship, s certainly nothing very serious, I met my dh at 31
Plus it can't have been easy dating with a young child to consider .

Much more normal than you think, because most people in your situation don’t admit it. Don’t worry about it!

There's many more people of your age who haven't been in a relationship than you think. Most of them just don't talk about it. So please don't worry, it's less common but not weird.

It's not that unsual - my SIL is mid 30s, has had one 'fling' we're aware of but has never had a partner. And she's stunningly gorgeous, very sociable and outgoing and incredibly accomplished.

Better to be single until now than possibly be trapped in a relationship that you're not entirely happy in.

A friend of mine spend most of her life single and met her husband at 39 and had their DD at 42

Hey, I’m also 32 and have never been in a real relationship. I have serious trauma from childhood plus PTSD which affected my ability to make and maintain relationships. I’m also a parent due to similar circumstances!

But other than my situation I know people who haven’t been in relationships - I think it’s more common now as everyone meets online and ghosts each other after a few dates. It’s gotten a lot harder but on the flip side it’s a lot more common.

Also, to add - I watch a channel called nami’s life on YouTube. It’s about a mid 30s woman who lives in Tokyo and cooks amazing food and lives a beautiful life as a single woman. To my knowledge she’s never been in a relationship. It’s a really lovely channel if you want to look it up :)

I’ve never had a relationship. I did a bit of soul-searching in the ‘lockdown years’ and gave much anguished consideration to all the possible ways I might be ‘weird’ and the reasons for that.

In the end, I decided to bugger it all, I am who I am, I can’t change myself or my past, there’s nobody else like me, nobody can tell me I’m doing life ‘wrong’ and fuck anyone who tries!

This attitude has brought me much peace and I heartily recommend it!

My sister had a "boyfriend" when she was 14, then nothing for years. She met a younger man when she was 34 (he was 26) and they've now been married for 5 years, so there's definitely hope out there! He hadn't had a girlfriend since school either, and they're a perfect match. My sister has more friends than anyone else I know, as she spent years when others were settled in relationships, building wonderful, lasting friendships. She's also Godmother to 7 children, which is a testament to how highly regarded she is - definitely not a weirdo!

I have a male friend who's extremely shy. He's very good looking and kind but crippled by shyness. Because of this he didn't have a relationship until his early 40s. He's now very happily married with two children. It just happens later for some people. You're not a weirdo!

I haven’t had a relationship between 32 and 50 except - 6 months conceived DS1. Married at 40 and divorced by 41. 3 months at 45. So totally of 2 years in 18 years

My DH had never been in a relationship when I met him (mid 30s). He's amazing. It is a bit unusual, but far from insurmountable!! If you're looking for a relationship, can a friend set you up? Much nicer than apps

Thank you everyone. I feel so much better after reading your responses ❤️

Not weird, just unlucky. It’s pretty hard to meet someone when you’ve been a single parent for most of your 20s.

If it makes you feel better:
I’ve never been in a relationship either, hell, I haven’t even been on a first date - never mind anything else (not from lack of trying).
And I’m few years older that you.

So, know that there are other women, or at least one woman out here who is even weirder than you.

But yeah, I’ve had all the doubts and cries and felt like a loser for many, many years.
I just had to learn to accept that this is how it’s gonna be for me.