Colleague answered my personal phone?!

[CaptainCabinets]

New colleague of a few weeks (I’m training her at the moment) answered my personal mobile when I nipped to the loo. It was on my desk, on silent so she wouldn’t have heard it ringing or vibrating. We don’t have work phones, so no reason for her to think it was a work call. I can’t think of any possible reason I’d answer a BRAND NEW colleague’s personal phone, surely you would just say ‘your phone rang while you were out’!

To add insult to injury, it was the midwife ringing to book my first antenatal appointment, so this new colleague who I know practically nothing about now also knows I’m pregnant before I wanted to announce it 🥴 and now I’m worried that if she doesn’t think it’s a problem to answer my phone, would she also not think it was a problem to tell other colleagues about my pregnancy?!

I didn’t say anything at the time as I excused myself to take the call and by the time I’d finished, we had a patient to see so the moment passed, but I feel quite uneasy about the total lack of boundaries this early on. How would you address it without making a ‘big thing’ of it?

You don't need the biometrics to answer a ringing phone, anyone can just answer it. DH and I found a phone recently and weren't able to access it but could answer it when someone called, and let the caller know that we had it safe.

You say she's new .. depends on where she worked before. Last company I worked with lots of staff had a company mobile and if a phone was on the desk it was a work call, so fair enough to take a message or find the person who went off without their phone

How would you address it without making a ‘big thing’ of it?

You don't.

You make a MASSIVE thing of it, it's a total invasion of privacy.

How did you not manage to bring this up with her the second a chance arose??

Completely wrong of her to answer it but I would have a bigger issue with a midwife who divulged anything without correctly identifying who they are speaking to.

I don't understand why you wouldn't address it at the time.

I don’t know if I would take that as having “cheek” I take it more as she is new, eager to impress… and trying to do you a favour. Some people would be annoyed if she had sat there and let it ring out. Answering phone calls can be daunting, let alone doing it for someone else! I find the hospital, a nightmare to get hold of if I’ve missed a calls from them! I don’t know about your midwife, but mine doesn’t announce my pregnancy when she rings me? She asks who she’s speaking to, and then gives me a date to come see them?? If you do think she somehow knows you’re pregnant, a quiet word, please don’t tell others.

A simple, “if my phone ever rings again, just leave it, I’ll ring them back when I have time…” it’s not a big deal.

It made no sound and didn't vibrate. How did she know it was 'ringing'?
I worked with someone that used to leave their phone on the desk on 'vibrate' all the time and it drove us mental because she was always away - legitimately - in other areas, and the bloody thing was buzzing all the time. So people would answer it to shut it up.

Surely you have a pin or fingerprint lock on your phone?? If not put one on then it can't happen.

To address a couple of things (although I mentioned why I didn’t bring it up with her immediately in my OP!)

1. I didn’t say anything at the time as I left the room to finish the call in private, and when I got back in, we had a patient to see so I didn’t want to start a whole conversation about it and keep the patient waiting, or have the conversation and then call them into a room with a sour environment!

2. My phone is on silent silent, I hate having the ringer or vibrate on, so it wouldn’t have been clattering about on the desk saying ‘answer me!’, she must have just seen it ringing and answered it.

3. Of course I have Face ID and passcode on, but you can answer an iPhone without unlocking it, although I can’t speak for other brands.

4. My clinical room is fob access only and the only people in there were the two of us, I had no issue leaving it on the desk because I didn’t for a moment expect that she would be remotely interested in my phone seeing as she isn’t a child and she has a phone of her own!

5. I don’t know if the midwife announced who she was, and I hope she didn’t as I wouldn’t announce who I was until I’d confirmed the patient’s identity! The call hadn’t long been connected so I’m hoping they didn’t get that far; I was only out of the room for as long as it takes to go for a wee. I will of course check with her when I meet her this week. I didn’t think to ask when I spoke to her on the phone as I was only thinking about the appointment. I’d prefer to ask the midwife if she told my colleague who she was before I ask the colleague not to mention a pregnancy she might not even know about!

Didn't the mid wife ask if she was speaking to Miss Captaincabinets?

I would make a HUGE fucking deal about this.

@CaptainCabinets Is your colleague from a different cultural background / new to the UK? (See my earlier reply; it could be that she thought it was appropriate according to the norms of her own culture, and needs to be told clearly that it doesn't work that way here.)

She is, so that could be a possibility. I’m gonna bring it up tomorrow, not in an all-guns-blazing way as it’s not really my style, but in a way that makes it clear that it was an invasion of privacy and that I don’t expect it to ever happen again.

I won’t mention who the caller was as I’m hoping that she never got to find out, but I’d feel the same way if she’d answered the phone to a random marketing call!

I would never leave my phone unattended in a public or office setting—she shouldn’t have touched it and you should tell her off for doing so—but its crazy to leave your phone out considering all the information that is stored in it.

As stated, it was in a locked, fob-access clinical room to which the public has no access. It wasn’t in an open office space, it’s a clinical room much like a room in a GP surgery. My phone has Face ID and a passcode and she couldn’t access the information in it without my face or knowing my passcode.

I should be safe to go to the toilet where I work and leave my phone on my own desk! It’s not like I left it behind the till in a supermarket.

I used to work in a clinical setting—my door licked and even the bathroom locked though patients were wandering around. I still would never leave it—well, come to think of it, the lockable staff bathroom was stupidly designed so we could easily get locked in so I carried my phone in self defense in case I needed to call the front desk to get me out.

i always left my works mobile and personal one on the desk and at times away having a chat, meeting etc for 10 mins or 30 - the others on the desk would just say - "your pnohe was ringing, etc - to alert me to the fact to have a look

Its no big deal she was just being helpful - just ask her not to in the future

I would not answer but not everyone is me

so the phone makes no noise when "face down" a call coming in?

Then her different cultural background is the most likely explanation, I think.

In your shoes I would just have a casual but pointed conversation with her over lunch, coffee, etc. Make it clear in a polite but firm way that there are certain norms/policies here (emphasize the cultural aspect, acknowledge that other cultures may be different and it's expected that some British/Western things may come as a surprise to her), which include maintaining privacy by not giving out or obtaining personal information about patients, clients, etc. to/from other people who know them, etc. Tell her that she could get into serious trouble professionally and be reported/sued by others for breach of privacy (assure her that you are not going to report her for this one trespass though, and say it like you are trying to help her and give her good advice, not venting your anger at her).

Nope! I don’t leave it face down though, that’s a habit I broke in my teens when my mum accused me of being secretive with my phone 😂😂😂

I would hate this and would never do this myself.

But my previous workplace did this all of the time.

Everyone seemed to just leave their phones lying around and if it rang the closest person would pick it up and say they’ll get the person.
I always kept my phone in my bag as there are numbers I don’t answer.

I would have just said at the time, can you not answer it in future as I am avoiding some calls.

In our clinical area we have a work mobile for other staff to contact us, staff to call in sick etc. Could she have thought it was something like that?

Although I definitely wouldn’t have assumed it was a work mobile if I was a new starter!

I work in the nhs and we are asked to answer other staff members work phones if they have left them on their desk to pop to the toilet etc. could she have thought it was a works phone ?

I had a little chat with her this morning and all went fine, she apologised and took it well. She didn’t mention anything about who called so I’m assuming she either didn’t know who it was or she’s choosing to keep quiet. Will double check with the midwife tomorrow too

Glad the little chat went well. Hopefully she won't do it again!

I don't understand so many giving out that left your phone. I often don't have pockets so wouldn't take my phone to the loo when I worked in an office.