To have found my first mammogram really upsetting?

[YompingJo]

Got a letter through with very basic details if an appointment. Turned up and found the whole thing demeaning. Tiny room, intimidating machine taking up most of it. The radiologist was monosyllabic and bossy and manhandled me into the right position including grabbing each breast and shoving it into position, pushing other bits of my body out of the way, not once asking first. I know it's a necessary procedure, but a bit of sensitivity would have gone a long way, and having the respect to ask for consent before grabbing a breast is a basic consideration. I'm autistic and needed to know much more what to expect beforehand. The letter gave a way to request assistance in the case of SEN, but I don't consider myself to have SEN and didn't know what I'd need until I was right there, so that wasn't any help. There was a QR code for feedback, which I gave but I just feel... invaded and demeaned. AIBU?

Like other posters, I have had many mammograms and never once has anyone asked for my consent before touching me and manipulating my breasts into the correct position. Agreeing to the appointment and turning up is you giving consent.

Surely this is not always the case? With other procedures I've definitely been asked for consent. Turning up wasn't enough!

I googled anything I was unsure of so as to be best prepared and know exactly what to expect.

I've done the same but have still been caught out by things not covered in what I'd read, or by things being different at my hospital. And sometimes a hospital will include notes with an appointment letter & you get there & find things are different from their own notes.

You have a voice and if you were uncomfortable with the treatment you were receiving, you should have said something, even just to tell her to stop and ask to see someone else.

Sometimes & for some people, this is just too difficult. Reasons might include: shyness, being unsure whether the procedure is being done wrongly (it was OP's first mammo), not wanting to make a fuss or be seen as difficult, fear of repercussions, fear of being seen to 'waste' an NHS appointment, not knowing your rights, fear of taking more time off work for another appointment, etc.

I'm willing to cut the OP some slack on this. I'm surprised others aren't.

YANBU

The radiographer was BVU for not explaining what she was doing, and for being abrupt. She should have made you feel at ease. That is such an important part of any healthcare job.

It is all well and good saying you should have researched it all before going, but sometimes that can make things worse. And it also does not prepare you for the embarrassment of having various body parts on show.

As a student HCP, I saw a patient being roughly handled by several members of staff, as she needed a 12 lead ECG (so the sticky dots are put under your boobs, and on ankles too). She was in recovery, and it was not a rushed emergency situation. A male nurse just pulled her gown down, exposing her breasts. No one explained anything to her at all. She was just treated like a slab of meat. The poor patient was in bits, and afterwards told me that she had wet herself.

During my training, it was drummed into me the importance of consent. Even explaining what you are doing goes a long way in helping a patient feel more comfortable.

It is normal to sometimes come away from procedures feeling a bit sore etc, but no one should be coming away from such appointments feeling demeaned and upset about how the staff treated them.

I hope you complain, OP.

On your last point - also, the OP's autism! A situation where a neurotypical person might feel a bit vulnerable, intimidated or awkward about speaking up, for all of the reasons you mention, is unlikely to be any easier for an autistic person, and might be much harder. Many posters are responding to the OP as though she can just turn the autism off if it makes things difficult. Knowing what's appropriate to say in general can be hard, and in an uncomfortable situation it's even worse.

I think we all have different ideas about the best way for this to be done.

I prefer to get in, be "handled" into position & go.

Not interested in any chat whilst I'm stripped to my waist tbh.

Mine has so far always been done in a Mammobile so it is pretty much "conveyor belt" & that suits me!

That said I tell them to just put me where necessary.

I wouldn't expect to be asked for consent. It's a mammogram. Of course, they are going to touch your breasts. Otherwise, they couldn't perform the exam.

Educational needs can mean additional supports like single occupancy exam rooms, more time to adjust to conditions etc. It doesn't mean that someone needs extra help with understanding Hume's Is/Ought theory or that it is solely confined to an educational setting.

Your example about typos/mistakes isn't relevant.

Not a chance I will go for one after everything I've read about them on here
My boobs are so large and dense they don't flatten so I can't imagine how sore it would be
If I press them and try to flatten them there's about 4 inches of boob still

You can’t assume everyone has the same level of understanding or cultural background when it comes to nudity/body touching so I think having the basics of the procedure and what will go where should be explained to everyone at every appointment. I’d think of that as a basic curtesy.

If it was a dentist, for example, I’d hope a good dentist would tell me what they were planning to do before drilling etc even if I had researched online. Just because it’s women’s breasts it doesn’t mean we have to put up and shut up about poor care.

If it was a dentist, for example, I’d hope a good dentist would tell me what they were planning to do before drilling etc even if I had researched online. Just because it’s women’s breasts it doesn’t mean we have to put up and shut up about poor care

That’s not the same. A dentist visit does not have mandatory drilling of teeth. It will involve a mandatory oral examination though and then what needs doing will depend on that so you’d expect that to be explained after the oral exam. A mammogram involves mandatory nudity, generally manipulation of breasts into position and a machine to take a mammogram. So, the more realistic analogy for your argument is that if you go to the dentist, the dentist must explain to you that you will need to open your mouth for them to look in to see your teeth during the visit. Also complaining that there was a large piece of equipment in the room for the mammogram is a bit like complaining you went to the dentist and they had a dentist chair and you were not expecting it because you hadn’t specifically been told …..

I think this was a lighthearted comment poking at the absurdity of the process! I too am very, very familiar with the mammogram machine, and have often said that if a man were to design a 'testes-gram' to detect testicular cancer, it would not invole squishing them between 2 metal plates.
But of course, I am eternally grateful for such an invention, and i happily grit my teeth for the test duration.
So, no, not a man-bashing comment

I too am very, very familiar with the mammogram machine, and have often said that if a man were to design a 'testes-gram' to detect testicular cancer, it would not invole squishing them between 2 metal plates

And yet these same ‘smart men’ are yet to come up with a hands off approach to prostate exams. Sometimes there is just no better option as yet, it’s not a specific attack on women.

You should have been treated with kindness and respect - it’s a real shame that didn’t happen. Don’t let that put you off in future though - it’s not always like that.

A foot pedal? Christ i had no idea. Im nearly 51 and yet to have my first. HH cup size

That's not the issue.

Your comment is irrelevant.

It sounds awful. I'm sorry that was your first experience. They are not my favourite things to get done, but last one I had the radiographer was so lovely I felt so considered and cared about. I've had all sorts of less lovely radiographers, and my very first one, I swear she was as an actual sadist.

But what you experienced, with no consideration, deference, respect for you as a human, or talking you through what she was about to do in terms of touching and shifting your body about, that is unusual, and unacceptable.

I have only had one mammo and the radiographer never touched my breasts, she just explained how she wanted them positioned on the machine. I even had to have a number of extra ‘nontypical’ views taken after the first images were reviewed. I would have been horrified to have been manhandled like this with no warning and I was/am neither anxious nor ND.

On the one hand you say you’re autistic and “needed” to know what to expect etc. On the other hand you say you don’t consider yourself to have SEN. Which is it?

As someone who doesn’t have SEN, showing up to an appointment for a mammogram = knowing and gratefully pre-consenting to the fact that radiographic images of my breasts will be taken. How else is that going to happen to breasts other than by ultrasound wand or the equivalent of an xray machine for tissue which is attached to your breast? How many women and men do you think these HCPs see every day? How much do you think they notice or care that this is your first or 20th?

As for complaining about the size of the room, that the machine didn’t look friendly… Jesus wept. Just don’t go next time. It’s not like anyone other than you is going to benefit from this 🙄.

I am so disappointed by some of the responses on this thread. It is becoming much more well known that women are generally subjected to a poorer experience than men when accessing healthcare and here on this thread we have women excusing it and blaming the OP for it. It’s really sad. You do not have to, and shouldn’t, put up with such a poor standard of care, compassion and communication. It’s simply not good enough.

We are fortunate, but it is not a privilege, we voted for it and we're paying for it. And people who don't treat patients with common courtesy are in the wrong job.

I’m a Mammographer. For screening, we have six or seven minute appointments and we have to get 4 high quality images in that time so we don’t have time for lots of chit chat. If it’s someone’s first time, I tell them I have to manipulate them into position and they will be pulled to get the back of the breast on. We have to push other body parts out of the way-if someone has a big stomach, it has to be out of the way so it’s not on the image. Would you rather someone pussy foot around and not pull you on and miss a cancer? Or not compress you enough so the image is blurred? Most of us do a physically demanding job with great tact and sensitivity within that seven minutes. It’s a good idea to watch a video of a mammogram beforehand if your first time so you know what to expect.

Whatever you had wasn’t a mammogram. It’s impossible to do a mammogram without touching or compressing your breasts.

@CombatLingerie you complain about being asked about soreness under your breasts. We have to ask as some people’s skin is very fragile underneath. There was a complaint at a nearby breast unit from someone because she hadn’t been asked about it beforehand-we can’t win!

@pelotonaddiction I also have dense breasts and it makes it harder to detect lumps ( according to my doctor) so we really DO need to get mammograms. I have to have 3D imaging rather than the standard ones. Please don’t avoid them, I had a cancer scare a couple of years ago and I had no idea that anything was developing as I couldn’t feel it. Luckily everything was ok.

I’m sorry about your experience, OP. Everything you describe was standard procedure so that the radiographer can get clear images, unfortunately- except for their brusque manner and not explaining what they were about to do. I’d focus on those aspects in your complaint. 💐

I don't remember mine being touched. I was expecting to have to lay my breasts on a horizontal metal plate, but the plate moved - angle and height, and I was told where to stand and place myself for each image. Maybe it's a new style machine? I've only had one, so could only compate with stuff online

When I went to the breast clinic years back, they did ultrasound and a needle biopsy, no mammogram. But the consultant did make quips about my breasts being small which I did not feel was necessary.

@EBearhug You must’ve got yourself in just the right position, I’ve had several mammograms and I’m always moved around. Mind you, I do have to have 3D images due to my dense breasts so they may be more tricky.