To not want to be a nurse?

[ToastTheCat]

I've recently started a mental health nursing course and I've been there for a month and a half and I really don't think it's for me.

I think what nurses do is absolutely incredible but the more I learn about the crumbling nhs, the abuse, the burn out, the physical demand of it I just don't think it's for me and I don't think I'd enjoy it although I do want to and enjoy helping people but with my own MH and capabilities I just don't think I'd cope.

My family are disappointed but I've applied for some office jobs which I think is more my style and something that I enjoy, I like the idea of going to the office, working 9-5 and then coming home and having weekends off with my kids (who are both under 3)

Is it wrong to try something and just not like it?

YANBU.

Better to decide now than to slog on until fully qualified and waste further time.

I'm not sure what you expected from mh nursing in the first place, but other than it all seeming a waste of time, no of course you can quit and do something else

I don’t mean to be harsh, but what did you actually expect? I’m sure you were aware of the state of the NHS and what nursing, especially with people with mental health would entail?

It sounds like you aren’t the right fit, and it’s a good thing you realised early on. Hope you find something that works for you.

MH nursing is tough - I have colleagues who work on MH wards and I don't think I could hack it. What about a different area of nursing? Something like Learning Disabilities if MH isn't your thing?

Something must have drawn you to it? Have you been out on placement yet?

I started a degree in Adult Nursing and stuck it out for six months until I admitted to myself it really wasn't for me, for similar reasons you have stated.

I've since gone on to get a degree and masters in something I love and do not for a second regret leaving.

I think you can know things but it’s not til you’re doing it that you know things. I did a psychology degree years ago all ready to “help” people, wanted to qualify as a clinical psychologist eventually, the whole nine yards. I am actually completely unsuitable but I didn’t know it then! I have enough trouble keeping myself on an even keel. I should have been an accountant or something. On my own with a load of numbers. (I know modern accountancy isn’t like that but it would have suited me down to the ground.) Heaven!

In your case OP, yeah, I’d accept it’s not for you and go find that office work. Maybe like me you have the academic interest but it’s not for you in practise.

I haven't been out on placement yet but like PP said I did understand what was expected and what it was like but I was all bright eyed and bushy tailed thinking I was gonna be the best mental health nurse to ever have existed and I was going to help loads of people when in reality especially with the restraints of the nhs and funding that isn't the case and I was wrong.

I've been qualified for 34 years
Today I'd tell my younger self to not bother
You've realised it's not for you now go and do something that makes you happy 💐

I was an HCP in a former life and worked alongside MH Nurses. It was tough, and I gather from friends who are still working in the field that it has gotten a lot tougher over the last decade. Most of the Nurses I worked with back in the day have left the profession or are actively looking to leave. I would say that if you're not truly passionate about it, if you don't truly love it, then you should get out. Even if you do love it it's hard. There are no material rewards and very little thanks, you have to find the work itself inherently rewarding. You also have to be extremely resilient, not just to the emotional toll of working with people who are in a great deal of distress, but the politics and the endless bureaucracy that makes working in the NHS challenging.

OT/SLT are other options which may be more suitable. Don't blame you for not wanting to go into nursing. They really are the front line for patients and all other staff members.

Another here qualified 34 years.
Don't do it to yourself.
Move on.

Better to admit it now OP as it only gets more difficult course work wise and what’s expected of you in placements the further through the course you get, I qualify in October as an adult nurse, I’ve worked in care in various roles since I was 18 (now in my 30s) currently work in community nursing and have completed this degree through the OU. My heart is in the community but due to funding there is no jobs so I’m currently trying to come to terms with having to work elsewhere starting again in a different team as a newly qualified nurse etc. I honestly underestimated though just how difficult third year would be and the level I need to be working at now as I near qualifying and honestly It terrifies me but I know it’s what I want to do and fills me with joy every day

Don't mean to sound rude, but what business is it of your family's if you drop being a nurse for a regular office job?!

If they're THAT bothered, let them train to be a nurse!

DO what YOU want to do with YOUR life!

I was a mental health nurse and at first I found it a rewarding job, enjoyed helping patients and the teamwork. I am so glad that I left when I did though, as I had become burned out by the constant new levels of demands upon me and the total lack of support from management. The job had actually changed radically before 2018 and now I dread to think what it is really like. I found it hard to leave though as I needed the money and a career change is hard, though not impossible of course. I would say to follow your instinct. Best wishes.

Yanbu op. I know people who left with only 6 months to go. 28 years qualified here and am now off the register. Had left nursing 2 years ago and finally deregistered end of March. Good luck with whatever you choose do do.

This

Or radiography

Good you know now. Don’t let others influence you. You have plenty of time to explore other professions too. Good luck. 🤞

30 years here. Still working the wards, still loving it!

Nurse qualified for 30+ years and love my job. If you feel nursing isn't for you then move on. It's a tough job and if your heart isn't in it it's not fair to put that on your patients and the other team members. I'm sure you'll find something else that inspires you.

I have a close friend who is a MH nurse and she finds it extremely tough and the funding etc is terrible but at the same time she said she would prefer it over my current 9-5 data processing job when i was telling her about what i do. I think she needs something a bit more challenging and worthwhile.

Tough one. I've been LD nurse for 15 years. Definitely seen some changes. Happy I did it when I did. When's your first placement? You might feel differently after that, it might make you think it's worth continuing or it might confirm if it's not for you. Maybe speak to other students in other branches and even your tutors. Can you take a year out to do some hands on work in different places and see if anything grabs your attention?

I agree with @Bassetlover 32years as a MH nurse - it is an amazing job, but hard work. You know yourself if it isn’t for you so its a good time to stop.

I do disagree though about not helping people everyday we support people to get out of bed, have some food, listen to their concerns, help them leave the house, monitor their physical health, support people to take medication, prescribe medication, talk to families, support people to get the right benefits I could go on….. these things may not be much to some people but these things can make a difference to someone who is suffering from an awful psychosis and who has not eaten, or showered, or someone who is so depressed they are not looking after themselves and are staying in bed all day! Most of these things are free and are not constrained by the the NHS.

MH nursing for me is not all about CBT, DBT, solution focused therapy etc., its empathy, listening, kindness and responding to need.

What about training to work in HR?