Confessions of a home improvements company/tradesperson:
Things we've heard from other tradies but would never do, TW: some of these are really horrible and racist.
A plasterer who went to the shops specially to buy a pack of bacon and then plaster it into the walls of a Muslim family's house just because he was that islamaphobic
Plenty of tradies who won't work with "foreigners"
Plenty that turn up to quote and then never send the quote because its a "foreigner" and they will assume they don't have them money or will try and haggle.
Also: it's not that uncommen for tradespeople to do things like open your fridge and take a swig out of your milk bottle or have a quick wank in your bathroom.
Things we have done:
Climbed up a ladder to the bathroom and accidently caught the customer on the toilet and then quickly climbed back down before they noticed.
Noticed your house is super disgusting and judged you for it. I'm not talking a bit of mess, I'm talking things like dog/cat shit inside the house and crusty 3 week old plates in the kitchen. Tradies will take pictures of shit like this and share it in tradespeople Facebook groups all the time.
We judge you if you don't offer tea. Always offer tea.
Things we don't do:
Lie about whether or not we can do the job or whether or not it's an easy fix. I don't know anyone who does this, and you can so easily get caught out if you do. Google is readily available. Customers value honesty.
Go through your underwear drawer, cupboards, private spaces. I don't know anyone who has done this.
Not turn up on time because we can't be bothered. We are genuinely doing our best. Jobs overrun, sometimes weather slows you down, sometimes customers slow you down.
Finally:
If you can't find someone who wants to do your job it's probably because it's either too small and not worth the bother for anyone, or because you have come across as really difficult or really tight. Never post a job saying "I want this as cheap as possible" no quality trades will respond, not because they want to overcharge you but because they think you won't want to pay the going rate or you will want to cut corners and use crappy materials you found in a skip.
Always remember when you use sites like checkatrade, mybuilder: The reviews are 99% real and verified, most of the people are genuine too but you are NOT the customer. The tradesperson is their customer. You are the product. They are going to want to keep the tradesperson happy, not you.
Please, please pay your invoices on time. You are causing so many problems for the company/sole trader by messing with their cash flow and maybe even holding up the job for the next customer. If there's a problem or you don't understand the invoice, say something, don't wait for them to chase you.