To consider selling our house and travelling the world with two toddlers?

[travellingwithtoddlers]

DH have been discussing the possibility of doing this for a while. DH is incredibly unhappy with his job at the moment and is considering quitting and having a break to de-stress. I am a SAHM and we have two toddlers aged 1 and 3.5.

We don’t need to sell our house to use the money to travel (we have savings we could use). We are considering selling our house, lots of our possessions and our cars in order to reduce our responsibilities here at home and putting things that we want to keep into storage.

Ideally we would spend some time in SE Asia, Australia, the Middle East and perhaps return home after 12-18 months. We would then look to buy a house again upon our return.

Is this idea great or am I just swept up with the excitement of planning the trip? We can afford to support ourselves for the trip, but it would use all of our savings. We would be returning purely to a deposit for a house (from the sale of our current house) which would be approx 40% of the value of the sort of house we would like to buy (if this makes any difference!).

Also - does anyone have any tips on places to visit?!

Yes you are right, it's definitely not for everybody. The benefit of travelling with very young children is that they don't really care if they play with somebody today and never see them again.

Totally appreciate this may be different with older children though.

We have since travelled extensively with our three (we had another baby). We have done other shorter trips - 8 weeks in duration and visited about 20 countries. Our three love travelling.

We must be part nomad 😁

It really won’t be. They are with their parents! Safe and loved and seeing all the wondrous things.

Of course they will interact twitch other adults!!! How bizarre to suggest they wouldn't. Kids interact with all sorts of people out and about.. I. Know of a family who spend their lives traveling the world and their kids are learning and thriving because they have been exposed to so manly different cultures and ways of life.
They make a point of finding cooking classes wherever they go and include the children.

This sounds like a mid life crisis talking.

What’s the longest you’ve been away with them? I’d want to have done a 2-3 week trip - just the 4 of you and not in a hotel - as a test run.

In general I dislike the idea that once you have children then your whole life must revolve around them, their naps and meals and things that they will enjoy. But I think there’s a balance and for me this is too far the other way. Little children value familiarity and routine. Uprooting them from that for a prolonged period isn’t something I’d do. They won’t understand and I’m not sure they’ll rise to the adventure as you might hope.

I ‘d be inclined to use the savings to allow DH to change his direction and improve your day to day family life in a more lasting way, But I was out of the room when they gave out the wanderlust so maybe I’m not the right person to comment.

To be honest, it may sound like an amazing plan, but at that age your children will really not enjoy it, will get nothing out of it and may find it very stressful. Small children thrive on routine and what is familiar, punctuated with just a bit of excitement.

If you really want to do it, do it but with your eyes open. Do the research, work out what it's actually going to cost. Cost everything, the flights including internal ones you expect to take, work out food costs, accommodation, other transport, storage and so on. I think you'll fins it will add up surprisingly quickly. Plan on having no income for 6 months after you return. Work out what minimum deposit you'll need including stamp duty and moving fees. Do not count on having a 40% deposit unless you've already put aside a chunk for contingencies. It might be less expensive to sell everything and just keep the important possessions with your family if you can. Cost buying whitegoods, furniture and cars.

You're highly unlikely to easily walk into new jobs, qualify for a mortgage quickly and even finding a rental could be hard depending on where you want to move. Make a realistic budget, than add a contingency amount to it, its highly likely it'll cost more then you expect. Work out at what point you might need to cut things short if costs blow out. If you're happy to end up with a much smaller deposit in return for this experience then go for it. Its a valid choice to make. If you only want to do this if you can still have a lot of that money left after your travels then maybe this isn't the right thing for your family and something shorter might be better.

I think people are underestimating the positives here and the value to both you and the kids. Take the road less travelled. Have an adventure. Think about how life will be if you don’t do it and how it will be if you do in terms of positives and negatives

go for it . Perfect time to explore ! Good luck and keep us posted

Go on holiday with your kids first for two weeks or so, that will give you an idea of how the dynamics work.

I.e. you, your husband, incredibly young children.

I feel like running away too sometimes, doesn't solve anything, and can land you in a bigger mess upon returning.

We travelled for just over 2 months with 1 child last year and it pretty much broke us. By the end of it we could t wait to get home (and we love to travel/ have travelled extensively). I wouldn’t do it without having a plan for occasional help etc.

If your children already enjoy traveling, it could work. My DD is a born traveler, she enjoyed traveling as a toddler; DS….not so much! He was a real misery, refused to eat properly for days at a time, cried a lot, and generally didn’t like being in new places. He suddenly changed at five and has been fine ever since.

The financial aspect is tricky. Personally, I’d want to have a home to return to in case you need to cut your trip short for any reason-illness, a global pandemic, etc. Do you have family who could house you in this event, or when you first return from your travels? It’ll take time to get reestablished.

If your oldest is 3.5 now & you’ll be returning in 12-18 months, what are you going to do about primary school? You won’t have a fixed address in order to apply by the deadline right? Do you know which area you want to live in when you get back? Have you looked into schools etc?

We have moved out of the UK and back again and it costs a fortune, even when work is covering a lot of the costs.

Buying and selling house is expensive, how would you get a new mortgage?
Do you have family to stay with while you find a rental or buy a house?
You would either need to store a house full of possessions, very expensive.
Or get rid of and rebuy, also expensive.
The cars would need stored and rebought, expensive.

If you do this make sure you have enough money saved for re-entry.

Also your DH will just have run away from his work problems, they need sorting at some point.
Why not take a long holiday and then come back and sort them while you still have some savings

I'd still rent. Honestly, should your plans change, or - for whatever reason - you can't buy what you want, you'll be incredibly glad of a house SOMEWHERE in the uk.

Have the best time!!

You won't be able to buy quickly because you aren't cash buyers and won't have any proof of earnings for a mortgage, unless I'm misunderstanding something?

There's lots of balanced advice on this thread.

Some are cutout for, and not freaked out by risk/change/uncertainty. They don't think too far ahead and can err on the side of cavalier.

Others are focussed on security, stability and being financially responsible and can't imagine being cavalier.

Neither is right or wrong - it's very important before you commit to being really honest with yourself in terms of what makes you tick. Don't make a decision to do this based on your desire to get away from a bad situation (e.g job) if you know that you will be equally miserable replacing the job with a situation that is at odds and with who you fundamentally are (uncertainty of flogging everything and having no fixed address).

I am nearly 50 and have only ever had 3 years of permanent employment in my whole life. I hate being tied down and decided very early that self employment was better for me. Despite the uncertainty and hardship of being self employed - I know I would be much more miserable locked into a permanent job, even if it meant I would have stable income.

Go and travel, I'm sure it'll be a very enriching experience, but don't sell your house. It's not worth the trouble for 12-18 months. Some people take longer than that to reach the point of exchange!

There are no rules to this. However, regarding renting, I would be apprehensive about being a landlord for a property in a different country. It seems like it's more effort than it's worth.

My friend just did this with her 10 yo DD and husband.
They rented out their house.

They had an amazing trip!!! Life changing for all of them.

Thier daughter grew so much during the trip. Exposure to different cultures is an incredible experience.

definitely do it!!

I don't follow how you'll be in a decent position to buy a property when you return home, with neither of you then having jobs to service the mortgage you want?

And surely if your DH is struggling with work, having a year out is going to make it harder to find decent suitable work he won't struggle with when you return.

Or do you intend to work all the way through this trip, which then means its a bit limited really...

If you can afford it and still support yourself back in the real world once you're done then yeah... its either do it now or wait until the kids can be left home alone for long periods so realistically, waiting another 16+ years from now.

I don't think I'd sell the house though, find a good, really good letting agency that also sells properties, so they can manage both things. It is then in their interests to ensure the property will easily sell on your return/when you give them the go-ahead to do so. That need not be when you return, you might tell them to start the process a few months before you come back, but it does at least mean you still have some sort of fall back if early on you decide the travelling isn't for you.

I am a landlord, who lived abroad for several years whilst owning property. Dh and I then came back to the uk and bought a house from abroad. We had to establish a uk address with certain bills before we could buy and things were nowhere near as stringent as they are now. We did this by using my family’s address. But I don’t think you could do that now as you need to show outgoings, expenses etc. You would have to come back and rent for a while before buying. Realistically that could mean maybe 3/4 years of no paying off that 25 year mortgage, which is quite a chunk. I’d think carefully before selling. Renting is also a risk as the tenant may refuse to move out or not pay so you’d need a financial buffer, a good agent and landlord insurance. But renting your property out would be my preference.

Go for it! My parents moved countries a lot when I was growing up and it was an amazing experience for me and shaped me in many ways (plus I'm completely tri-lingual).

We sold our house and moved to SE Asia. We absolutely did not want to be landlords - too expensive. A house is only bricks and mortar.

We've been here for 9 months. We both have jobs in the same school that our children attend. If you go, have you thought about the possibility that you might not want to return to the U.K.? Could you go travelling for a couple of months and have your husband look for work in a place you’ve enjoyed spending time in? Treat your travelling like a recce? Sell your house when you are sure - I felt our house was such a ball and chain. I was done with the U.K. housing market.