My kids range in age from early 20’s, teens to tween.
I am constantly dragged into the middle of arguments between eldest 20 something, a teen and a tween, the eldest blames the teen and says she is the problem, manages to fall out with the teen and tween.
i told them all tonight im not getting involved in conversations where they basically bitch about each other and get angry with me for not sorting out the problem. Which in their mind is the fault of the other person.
eldest thinks teen is spoiled and that’s my fault, teen thinks eldest doesn’t like her. I gave three others who seem to keep out of things.
am I being unreasonable to tell them to sort things out themselves especially the eldest who mostly lives away from home but is back for a stay at the moment and planning to move back full time in summer.
im exhausted and there are no right answers. They all just want me to back them up and join in their missing about their sibling with no interest in making things better as nothing is their fault.
I put a message on the family chat saying I wasn’t listening to gossip anymore but would help them work out how to get on. That went runs well…. Just really sick of it.
yabu - you should punish the child who does wrong on every occasion and take a side and mediate between them
yanbu - they need to start talking to each other and work on their relationship without you constantly being in the middle