To think my child might have behavioural problems?

[imfindingithardnow]

He is nearly 3 and a half. He doesn’t seem to listen to me or to his dad at all. Yesterday he seemed to go absolutely wild, he asked for a drink and I gave it to him and then he poured it all over the floor and ran in it then all through the house laughing. He climbed onto the roof and was running round laughing hysterically. He demands things and screams at me when I say no. His eating is quite poor in a way: if you don’t feed him he doesn’t really eat.

He attends preschool 3 days a week and no concerns have been reported. Not really sure what to do.

@PTSDBarbiegirl I’m definitely making more of an effort to do this. I’m not sure how effective it is being. Just gave him lots of praise for being super helpful in the supermarket (picking up one courgette!) and now we’re having huge tantrums because he wants to play with the hose pipe. Hard to ignore!

I wasn't meaning to criticise. I was just trying to make suggestions. I do understand how difficult it is with a young child with very challenging behaviour. I have been there. Developmentally they are at an age where they have such big feelings and can't express them.
When he's calm I would try to chat about emotions and give names to some of those feelings so that he can tell you more clearly how he might be feeling. My daughter was better once her vocabulary improved.
I wish you all the best, it is exhausting

Sorry if I was a little sensitive.

Talking to DS about anything is challenging, he either changes the subject and rambles on about unrelated things or he just repeats / screams eg I WANT TO GO OUTSIDE.

Can he go outside and play with practical 'real' things, is your outside environment safe enough for him to play. What I mean by ignore is that it makes such a huge impact on a kid that age to intentionally not give eye contact, physical contact etc for bursts of time. Physically turn your body and face away. The second there's an improvement then refer to it, "I like you are using quiet voice, good" etc but dont say anything else then give a physical deep pressure hug. Google 'heavy work jobs for 4 Yr olds'. Try to avoid meaningless praise... Martial arts are great for little energetic physical risk takers, Karate for kids.

He can and he does but I find this is a huge contributor to the poor behaviour as he is dangerous (this was the precursor to the roof incident) and he demands to go out all of the time. We do plenty and I get him out a lot because he’s generally easier out and about.

I'm sorry I'm still stuck on the roof. I know you say it wasn't on your watch but how does anyone leave a 3.5 year old, yet alone one with such behavioural issues as yours, unsupervised long enough to enable him to do this?

The only child I've cared for who tried to do this was a 6 year old autistic child. His aim in life was to escape, but he was never left unsupervised 🫣

@TinkerTiger it isn’t helpful to be stuck on the roof in either a literal or figurative sense.