To feel like I can’t go on with this financial pressure as a single parent

[habal10]

I am beyond stressed and have been awake most nights this last week worrying about money. I earn 3,600 after tax. My mortgage is 800 for a two bed and council tax and utilities 400. Nursery is 1600 a month and petrol and car costs 300 a month (including car finance of 180). After my phone bill (20), 120 repayment on interest free credit card and food I have literally no money left at all. I am stressed with work and coping with dc who is 19 months. I feel like I can’t sustain this and just want to give up. I don’t actually know what to do and I look awful as I have no decent clothes, my shoes are 6 quid from the supermarket and make my feet bleed, I can’t afford new ones. Not saying for sympathy just to give an idea of the reality. I feel genuinely sick most days as I just don’t know how I can carry on living like this. I am not entitled to anything as salary and mortgage means I have no access to universal credit, I have checked online and also called in desperation and it was confirmed I have no entitlement to anything. I am so worried

Would a childminder be cheaper than nursery fees?

Have a look here, there might be something you can access.

https://www.moneyhelper.org.uk/en/money-troubles/cost-of-living/where-can-i-get-emergency-help-with-money-and-food#how-to-get-emergency-money-from-the-government

I've just seen that you have to be on a low income for this, so probably no use to you.

Also perhaps even worth using a food bank for one month (or more) and buying yourself a decent pair of shoes with the money you save. Food banks are for anyone struggling.

You are on a decent wage and your mortgage isn't massive. have you looked at what help is available for childcare. Also child maintenance. Childcare costs are for a few short years at that high a cost. Look at going interest only on your mortgage. Once childcare has reduced you can overpay.

You own your own 2 bed house and your child is very young still - so I’d get a lodger and move your child in with you. That will fix your financial issues until maintenance claim is sorted.

Nothing much else to suggest other than what’s been mentioned.

• Keep seeking child maintenance
• Use a food bank and claim child benefit - at least this will give you a basic budget for clothing/shoes
• Look into cheaper childcare options
• Speak to your mortgage company about going interest only or extending the term of your mortgage (under the Mortgage charter they have to let you do one or the other for six months)
• Only pay the minimum on credit card and ensure it’s on 0% interest

Know that in two years you’ll likely have had further pay rises and your childcare costs will reduce significantly, the end is in sight!

Are you getting the 20% govt childcare help?

Google your local councils name and food pantries.

If there is no list freely available online, call your council and ask if they know who can send you one. If the person you speak to says no, ask to speak to the person was in charge of administering the Household Support Fund, they will be able to provide you with a list.

Can you speak to your mortgage company and go interest only for a year. Then you only have to get through 5 months before subsidised hours kick in.

OP do you use tax free childcare ? You need to get onto this now

www.gov.uk/tax-free-childcare

It is supposed to be that from September the 15 funded hours will apply to all kids over 9 months. It probably won’t make a huge difference - ten years ago when mine started getting the hours it reduced our bill by about £150 I think - but it will be a reduction of some sort and that will help.

So you just have to get through the summer. Have you had a look at your gas and electricity meter readings? Right now most people currently owe money and then they use less over the summer and so they end up having overpaid by September time. So you may be able to reduce your payments between now and September.

Can you compress your days into 4? So 9 hours instead of 8? It wouldn’t quite be full time but may work out better with only 4 days of nursery.

I think child maintenance is about 15% so £650 a month? Get on to the CMS if he’s not paying already

That sounds really tough.

Can you move mortgage to interest only until you get 15 free hours?

I assume you only pay council tax as a single occupent?

Can you get phone bill down? I pay £7 / month sim only contract.

Do you have a food pantry you can go to? as well as £2 entry for a big bag of stuff at our community centre they have a community pantry cupboard outside in the car park that anyone can open and take food from at any time.

Or (just an idea, and depending on where you life and work etc) could you get rid of the car and get a bike with a trailer or bike seat for baby on the back? Then maybe budget yourself a couple of ubers a week or something?