For thinking my 5 year old shouldn’t be taking an hour to fall asleep!

[Cleggin]

Just that really!

I’m tearing my hair out!

Is this normal at this age? It’s not every night, he usually takes 10-30 mins but tonight is ridiculous.

Any tips, advice or solidarity appreciated

Why is it a problem. Maybe they aren't tired, just leave them to look at a book or play quietly in bed and they will fall asleep when tired.

My 4yo will take between 10 and 90 minutes to fall asleep at bedtime. No rhyme or reason as to why it's the former or latter. I try not to stress about it - just leave him to it and check on him intermittently.

@Cleggin

what are you doing while he's awake?

id just leave him to it, tell him i'll be back after I've done xyz .

Allowing him to look at books or play with teddies, but that's it.
check periodically.

Because he will behave like an absolute shit demon tomorrow if he doesn’t get enough sleep! And I haven’t got the energy to deal with it.

My youngest used to take hours sometimes. We never cracked it despite trying everything, she just suddenly started going to sleep easier and sleeping better one day....many years after she turned 5! 😬

Making sure he gets outside every day for fresh air and to burn off energy will help.

Well I have insomnia and have zero control over it so someone telling me I had to go to sleep would make zero difference whatsoever.
Just have a regular bedtime and let him lie in bed and read quietly, or try audiobooks maybe until he's ready for sleep. You can't force someone to be tired if they're not.

I peek in every now and again, but can hear him whispering to himself and tossing and turning. He should be exhausted, after the first full week back at school, plenty of fresh air and exercise. But no, he won’t sleep! 🙈

That’s awful and I feel for you, must be horrible wanting to sleep but not being able to. He is tired, he’s been yawning all afternoon and as a child, surely he needs more sleep than the average adult?

Typing this while waiting for a 7 year old to fall asleep. He takes up to an hour quite often. I leave him to lay quietly in the bed with soft music playing, go and watch on of my trashy to shows then come back in to check on him after 5, 10 then 15 minutes. He’s usually asleep by the 3rd check. In my experience kids really respond well when you say you’re coming back and then actually do. It builds trust and makes them feel safe enough to relax and fall asleep. Still really annoying and I’d much rather be done with bedtime already 😂. Might not work with yours but might be worth a try!! Good luck ❤️

I feel your pain. Sometimes my daughter takes a couple of minutes, sometimes upwards of 2 hours. It’s definitely worse when she’s had lazy day at home with no exercise and too much screen time. I have also cut dessert at dinner so she’s not hyped on sugar before bed.

to be fair, most of the time she just lies there listening to her Yoto player so it’s not causing me an issue as such, but she can then be very grumpy the next day as a result.

What time is his bedtime, OP?

Between 7.30 and 8, usually closer to 7.30 if I can manage it. He always says he’s not tired while yawning his head off

We do bedtime with our six year old then but a child friendly sleep meditation on. It includes a full body scan and helps her relax after the day.

I am aware this probably isn't a stealth boast, but honestly - it's fine. It's an hour. Presumably, if your child's bedtime is 8 at the latest you're done by 9.

Were none of you children? Children are wired weird.

Mine often did. And the worst for it still finds it hard to fall asleep. I gave them audiobooks because at least that way they are happy and I can go and do other stuff, and it’s a habit that stuck. They love them

After bath time, I give my little girl a back massage (my son doesn’t sit still for a long enough). Do you think your son would respond well to that? My girl is asleep within minutes.

It sounds like his body is beginning to shut down, but his mind is still searching for the next thing to do. Perhaps (if you haven’t already), introduce an essential oil diffuser. I’ve also heard magnesium spray is really good for sleep, but would check with Dr if it’s recommended for his age.

Best of luck.

You need the calm app and a sleep story!

DD2 and DD5 fall asleep very quickly. We do a very calm bath before bed, lotion/ little massage targeting their feet ( something my mum did with me, no idea if it does anything) No toys in their room apart from the soft toy they sleep with, blackout curtains, a small nightlight that glows little stars on the ceiling. We read one boring bedtime story - quiet voice, so they have to listen carefully. Hug and a kiss goodnight, leave them to drop off by themselves, DD2 is often asleep partway through the story.

As I say it’s not every night. Usually if he’s had a busy and overstimulating day or if he’s had a sugar rush before bed. We obviously try and avoid those things as much as we can but sometimes it’s unavoidable. Some nights he is out like a light but others it drags on and it stresses me out as I know it will impact on mood/behaviour the next day. He’s generally a great kid but he is very easily excited which might explain why he struggled to wind down at times. Doesn’t help that I’m usually solo parenting at bedtime and trying to manage both him and a headstrong and very loud 2 year old on my own which doesn’t exactly equal a relaxing bedtime for anyone!

yep that sounds stressful OP! Like someone else said though an hour isn’t actually that bad if that’s the worst it gets. Try to reframe it in your mind as not that bad and you know it will be over soon. Might not make it go quicker but might be less stressful. Basically you’re doing fine! Give yourself a break 😘