To talk to my teen son about heavy petting?

[Itsnot1995]

Son is 15, 2nd GF and I really think I need to talk to him about petting ...but...how....mumsnetters help!? Please!? He knows about sex, i.e not having it as under age and risk of pregnancy and using protection. I don't think that's an issue (but sure it will be at some point, hence we do talk about it)
But should I be discouraging heavy petting, what's the best way to approach it, or how do you let them explore without going too far? I feel like teens need to explore, but obvs need to set boundaries etc. open to any helpful advice! Tx

😂😂

Maybe this is why they're considered the most dangerous safari animals. Morons trying to finger them.

I believe it was a bombing beaver if memory serves me well (as a petting beaver is too on the nose)

It wasn't too hippos either. Like a gazelle I think. Wtf was the thinking there? What fucked up safari were the artists on?

This thread is all sorts of wrong.

I think OP will be disappointed that his thread has ended up as a piss take, rather than posters sharing stories of their teens. Definitely a Herbert. 🤮

It reminds me of those 90s swimming rules posters.

That made me snort

Yes, I'm sure it was a beaver bombing in!

Thanks all, I'm not gonna use the phrase heavy petting, agree he would cringe !!! and the 80's pool vibes are making me laugh, so to all of those and all the helpful comments, I thank you! I suppose it's the how so you allow it (as pp said, we know what teens want to do, we've all been there) without allowing the whole act?!
Genuinely, just the well considered phrases about consent are really helpful so I can make sure I do use the right language.
Feeling more comfortable about it (but not about hippos getting fingered...that's just wrong)

Maybe stay out of the water for a while.

Reminder about age of consent and to always respect each others boundaries with the other stuff.

The rest of it is up to him and girlfriend. Start mentioning heavy petting and you'll have him cringing in to the next decade!

Think back to what you were getting up to at that age too 🫣.

My DS1 was very money oriented and the thought of an accidental pregnancy and the associated cost for the following 20 years put him off girls until his 20's 🤣.

This is so weird. Perhaps take him to the swimming pool and just point silently at the sign until he gets the idea.

Why on earth do you not want him to kiss? Poor kid. Is he allowed to masturbate or is that forbidden too?!

I love watching my teens squirm when I talk to them about boundaries and consent. It’s payback for all the public tantrums they had when they were toddlers 🤣

”Son, do we need to talk about contraception? Radio 4 was talking about the rise of chlamydia in his week, are you protecting yourself against STDs”

OMG MUUUUM, you’re so embarrassing.

Beat time to do it is in the car when they can’t escape.

This is making me think of Grease 2 😂

m.youtube.com/watch?v=Wcpc0uX3nZQ

You don't "allow" your 15 year old to have sex. They will have sex when they're good and ready.
You make sure he knows about contraception and have some in an accessible place in the house. You make sure he knows about consent and pressuring.

Make sure he knows about appropriate places, bedroom fine, fingerings girlfriend at the dinner table, not fine.

I've no idea how you might set boundaries or police it?! The mind boggles! You could in fact see if you could get one of those swimming pool signs on eBay or something and add a photograph of your disapproving face to it on his bedroom wall but that might only have success in that space, which goes onto what you might like to discuss instead - dangers of doing stuff like this in public/inappropriate places, and obviously as mentioned many times the all important consent and contraception.

You have taken me back to swimming pool posters in the 1980s - no dive bombing, no running, no heavy petting

Haha was anyone ever actually heavy petting in the pool anyway with a bunch of screaming splashing kids always around 😆

Heavy petting, haven't heard that term for years.