To be in tears on my break?

[HadEnough11]

I had to get a nursery job as there are very few nanny roles around at the moment. It has been pure hell if I am honest.

We are never fully staffed. Agency in everyday. Some good, others not and even if they are good, they don't know the kids which obviously impacts negatively.
A few SEN kids who don't have 1/1 as the funding isn't there and nobody wants the job.
Endless cleaning.
Staff all bickering as stressed to the hilt.
Management always nit picking
Very long hours, often 8/6. I am exhausted and regularly feel sick with tiredness and the physical demands. I do have an autoimmune disease and am 39, but it isn't that. I still feel I would be the same in my twenties and no illness.
This morning one of the sen kids kept running out of the room, continuously. All I have done is run to get him. Soothe screaming children. Clean and I still have a good few hours left.
Aibu to say I can't cope?

Well, come out in tears also. I am completely drained.

Didn’t want to read and run as I can see you haven’t had any replies on here yet OP.
Sorry to hear you’re having such a hard time at work, it’s horrible when you have a job you don’t like but have to turn up to everyday.
I’ve worked in nurseries myself so know how hard going they can be. I left a private full time day nursery to work in a school pre school, is there any chance you could do this? The hours are so much better, you get all of the school holidays and the pay, for me, worked out almost the same each month (just slightly less in the pre school compared to the nursery.)
In the mean time, could you be signed off work with stress just to give yourself a break and have a search around to see what your options are job-wise? Nobody should be leaving their work place in tears ):
Good luck OP

Awww, I'm so sorry to hear this. I think a lot of jobs are really stressful at the moment (often due to understaffing and poor management).

My job got a lot like this : it was just one thing after another until I just resigned after one particularly bad day.

Maybe think about moving on - you have to ask if it's really worth risking your health and happiness.

Completely understandable to get stressed and release it as tears, I'd have done the same! It's horrible being understaffed, especially in an already potentially challenging environment (I know from working in care homes in the past, so I completely sympathise). Keep your head up, Monday is a new week!

Thanks for replying.
I'm going to look at term time nurseries and hold out hope that a proper nanny role comes along.
I used to do 7AM/6PM 3 days a week but family no longer needed me.
I am so unhappy right now.

Also, I’m sure you’ve already tried this, but have exhausted every single avenue when trying for a nanny role? Have you signed up to all nanny’ing agencies in your area, joined nanny’ing fb groups (if you’re on fb) tried websites, private ad sites etc? Even word of mouth, if you’re on social media could you do a status asking if anyone knows of someone needing a nanny? You never know, you could get lucky, worth a try.
Sorry in advance if you’ve already tried all of this!

There are places to work with children that don’t make you feel like this, and I’m sure not every nursery is this bad. Time to start looking for another job.

Nurseries are on the whole, much the same I have found. I have trained in a lot of them and since covid it has got a hell of a lot worse. I have friends who do the same job and they all agree.
In terms of the nannying. There seems to be a lot of jobs which are short hours that come up. It's not enough unfortunately. With the rise of WFH and COL, it has had a big impact on the nanny industry.

@HadEnough11

my job is ending now too, she's off to uni in Sept!! 13 years, it's killing me 😭😭

im a good bit older than you & could not cope with a nursery!

I was looking at Nanny jobs (nothing locally really), a new job appeared today, exciting me thinks... 2 yo & 7 month old twins. (I had an accident a couple of years ago & no longer have full strength in my shoulders so baby twins are beyond my ability, shame but...). Then I read the hourly rate, £15 ph gross. I'm not looking after just a toddler for that, never mind toddler & baby twins.

Are there agencies that offer short contract emergency nanny cover roles? I would imagine they would pay better.

would you consider offering more of a nanny/ housekeeper role to be of more value to a family with school aged children?

Nurseries sound like a hellish place to work.

Reason #18374 I'm glad to be home educating

I wouldn’t really want to be a housekeeper.
I just mentally and physically cannot do it anymore . The days are so long and draining and then I come home, eat, shower, bed, then up again at 6AM to go through it all again.
I am seriously looking into my options this weekend

@AutumnNanny I am older, long out of the game . That rate is shocking ! I was on that 10 years ago . Never could get my head around people wanting to scrimp on childcare . Ironically now I have loads of enquires and cpild pretty much name my price if I wanted to return .

Oh, op, I really feel for you.

I have had 16 years of this. Many a lunch break I've spent crying in the loos. Hence, my username.

The childcare sector has become a toxic shitshow with no appreciation for the work we do.
I hate to be a doom and gloomer, but I'm afraid it just isn't going to get any better. Nursery owners don't give a shit and neither does the self-serving army of twats that is our government.

I'm thankfully leaving in a few weeks to work in a family run shop. Better pay for much less responsibility and no long ass shifts.

I know you're reluctant, but honestly, I'd just try something new and completely different. It's only going to get worse, so get out while you can.

Yes, I agree it will only get worse.
I’m getting too old for this and there are no benefits to me working here. It is soul destroying and feels like crowd control much of the time with so many demands from management and parents.

Have you thought about childminding, OP? You are in control then and with your experience you would find you’re very much in demand. It can be financially profitable too.

Not in the position at the moment to do that as I live with a parent who works from home. Embarrassing I know at my age.

I don’t think it’s people purposely wanting to scrimp, it’s just that many can’t afford it at the moment with the COL. £15 and hour for a full week is £39k a year. It’s just not affordable for most to pay that, let alone pay more. It’s also why there aren’t as many nanny jobs around at the limber, people can’t afford it and are opting for other childcare settings. Market value, like everything.

Totally understand. I am giving up nursery nursing in July and am counting down the days.
I absolutely love the kids I work with and the staff but upper management just pick on us all the time, the stress , constant training, staff meetings and paperwork is killing me.
I'm constantly exhausted and snappy at home and it's not worth it anymore.
My DS has additional needs and will likely need extra support starting school but I think I would still be leaving if this wasn't the case
It's just too much.

Soul destroying is the exact words I use to describe the job too. I used to love my job when I first started. The ridiculous demands put on us over the years put a finish to that.

I can't entertain and supervise the children while I am forced to be glued to the tablet doing photos, observations, updating the app etc every fucking 10minutes.
It's impossible to fit in daily photos and observations when I am supervising and entertaining the children and looking after their needs.

The children come first, so sod the tablet, you say? Then I get a fucking bollocking for not having it done. So what do I do? I'm forced to run myself into the ground to get the tablet stuff done. Forced to leave my colleagues under ratio while I complete the photos and obs. Forced to stay behind the end of my shift to update the app. Forced to take the planning folder home and work on it outside my working hours because I have no time.

All for minimum wage, mounds of stress and absolutely no recognition or thanks.

It's become an absolute joke and I'm angry at how much we are expected to do for so little pay.

Oh that sounds so hard, it's totally understandable that you have reached burn out. I hope you can be kind to yourself over the weekend.

Have you thought about portage work? Or being a teaching assistant in a school? A couple of people I know have done these from nursery nursing and really enjoyed the change of scenery and pace.

Health visiting teams, maternity units and neonatal units also all employ nursery nurses.

There is so much you can do with the skills and experience you have, I hope you find something you love and that doesn't make you cry soon. ♥️

I’m so sorry to hear this. Hopefully you can find something not as taxing. You need to take care of yourself and your mental health. All the best

Sounds like where I was. Put the children first we're constantly told but then get told off because not every child has a photo, meals, sleeps or nappies aren't on the app. We do planning every week in our own time, unpaid, but we don't get time to do our planned activities.
Parents seem to think their child is the only one in the entire nursery and put stupid demands on us and seem to think we can fix problems that don't happen at nursery.
Zero support from upper management who basically back the parents
Totally wiped out every evening

Hey - old thread - but have u managed to leave nursery work ?

Most of people I know have changed over to school TA roles, and picking up shifts in supermarket for extra cash (as supermarkets don't have full time roles)