"What does she actually do?"

[solucky1988]

Is a comment my partners work colleague apparently made when he turned up to work with last nights pasta, and when asked if I'd cooked it he told him no I didn't, he cooked.
Yes he cooks, but that's it.
I've recently decided to stay at home with our 2 children. What I do I stay home with our 2 year old and keep every single aspect of the house clean and tidy.
But apparently I do nothing.
AIBU to be hurt by this?

Sounds like your husband is shit stirring. If it was said there was no need for him to pass on the message.

maybe you should have a chat with him as it seems as if he thinks you are not pulling your weight

and what does she “actually do? I only have one child and I am working part time but I feel like sometimes going to work is like a break. think sometimes people who don’t have a clue underestimate just how hard it is managing small children all day ! Also agree with pp why did your partner even mention this ? I think a child free weekend with friends is in order, leaving your partner in charge. This may serve as a reminder as to what you “actually do”. No doubt he would be frazzled upon your return!

Why would he relay this to you? X

Was the idea of you quitting work and him being solely responsible for funding the family a joint decision? Did he expressly say he was happy about it? Or did he BS around it and is now subtly but not subtly telling you he isn't happy with it?

Just repeating what others have said, really:

Why did he feel the need to relay this information?

I'd suspect this was his 'clever' way of either complaining about the fact that he has to do the cooking or hinting that you're lucky to have such an amazing man and better appreciate what you have.

If you've had other arguments about the workload split, you can probably guess his motivation. I can't think of any good, kind reason for him to pass along this nugget. It's unlikely he wouldn't have realised that it might bother you, assuming the colleague actually said it at all.

ETA: It's probably more typical that a SAHP would do the cooking, but if that's what he wants, he needs to be an adult and address the issue head-on rather than taking such a cowardly approach designed to make you feel like crap.

Your husband sounds like a bit of a dick here.

Mine would've shut his colleague down immediately and if he chose to tell me about it, it'd be because he was still annoyed.

His reply to this person is the only important thing. If he politely told them to fuck off and back off, there’s no issue. If he didn’t, I’d be putting him straight.

He had no reason at all to tell you that and it sounds like pretty bullying behaviour from him. Maybe no one said it at all and it's his cowardly way of having a dig at you. No mother should be under valued like that.

This. It's incredibly risky to SAH without the legal support of marriage. He's happily building a career on the back of your domestic labour, but you won't get a share of the assets he's building if you split. So no pension, house, savings - literally only child support, which is capped at £1500 anyway so not enough even to live well on.

Leave him at home.e one weekend, see how he manages

Such comment says nothing about its intended victim but everything about its originator.

Why? My husband cooks all the time and I home educate our daughter while he works.