To exclude this parent from gift collection

[NameChangeAK]

DD (age 9) is part of an under 10s football team. They have a team coach who I’m arranging a group end of season ‘thank you’ collection for. The coach themselves has twins on the team. The other parent of these twins comes to watch the football and is in the group chat etc, but is separated from the coach (the girls’ father). Im wondering do I include the mum of the twins in the gift collection chat for the ‘coach/dad’ or just keep it to the other parents and exclude her? They seem to be amicable. Thinking of asking for £5 per player towards a gift for the coach.

Include her. Worst case is she won't contribute.

I'd include her. She can decide whether she wants to or not
And in behalf of all the volunteer coaches who do this sort of thing - thank you for organising it.

Hmm. I would include everyone but I wouldn't make it compulsory or specify £5. Just say that you are doing a collection to get a gift, if anyone would like to contribute, and send to everyone.

Demanding £5 is not on especially in the current climate

Include her. My husband runs the team my DS plays in, I've always contributed.

Thank you - £5 was just a suggested amount. I’ll actually say something like ‘e.g £5 or whatever you would like to contribute towards a thank you gift for x’

Though given the annual club fees are £300 and the coach is giving several hours a week of their own free time unpaid - I think £5 per child as an annual thank you is not a lot to ask.

I'm divorced from my kids' dad and I'd always appreciate being asked for this kind of thing. Even if I didn't contribute (I probably would).

But I agree not to specify an amount.

You don't get it. For a lot of people right now £5 is a lot to ask. Especially if they've cut back to try and afford £300 a year for this for their kid.

Anyway of course you include her in that chat.

Itd be really strange to leave her out. But make it optional, £300 in club fees is actually quite a lot, that’s not a cheap club, my son plays for under 9s and it’s £135 for the year. I’m sure the coach isn’t giving his time for the end of year gift.