Have been married for 10 years now and have 3 DC. 9 year old son, 6 and 3 year old daughters.
Now our family have been meaning to go on a family holiday for a long while now. I work and booked in annual leave for a week in May a while ago. We have previously discussed potentially going to Turkey in May.
We have not been on a family holiday abroad EVER. There’s always been something getting in the way or excuse after excuse.
DH said with a change of mind that he would rather go on holiday in August due to him saying he can’t contribute financially to the holiday in May but can contribute for August time instead.
Thing is I asked him if he has checked the prices of the holiday in August. He clearly said he hasn’t. I did my research and it’s 2.5k more expensive to go in August. Another reason I wouldn’t want to go in August the debilitating heat of Turkey in August.
And the prices in September are not any better. And before you know it it’s close to winter time and another year has gone by.
Me and DH have been to Turkey many years ago in July by ourselves and the heat was unbearable.
Now my husband says I should just listen to him and respect his decision of wanting to go in August. I have been trying to explain to him the heat and money factor and that if we go in May it’s a couple of grand cheaper and it’s only a week. He is being particularly negative and stating no is no like I am a child.
The children are already aware of the holiday as they have been begging to go for years now. I am even considering going on my own because majority of us have our hearts set on going in May. I HAVE NOT YET BOOKED the holiday it’s literally weeks away as he has been so avoidant but the prices are getting cheaper the closer it gets to May.
My husbands job is flexible as he’s basically self employed so time off work isn’t a problem. I could really do with his help as my youngest daughter can be a bit of a handful and it would be ideal to have another adult with me. I am also considering taking my brother with me as my husband just isn’t budging. The children obviously want their dad to come.
His main reasoning is not being able to contribute financially for this holiday right now. Eventhough we have been planning this holiday for a while. I genuinely don’t know what he does with his money because I don’t take a penny off him and able to look after myself. I said I will pay for the holiday and for him to just pay me back in instalments over the months otherwise to forget paying me back for a while until he can.
His finances is a whole other problem. He also is NOT a hard worker in all honesty. Majority of the time he doesn’t get out of the house until like 1pm after being in bed all night and morning and then works for a couple of hours before calling it a day. He is a taxi driver. I constantly tell him he obviously won’t earn much if he doesn’t put the time into it. And at night he will stay up till 2am playing on the Xbox or watching stuff on his phone and then whenever I want to discuss anything with him such as this he may reply a bit and then go on his way out the house and text me with the real responses of how he is feeling 🤔
This is obviously a very personal matter but do you guys think I should just respect his decision? Or is he being unreasonable?