To want DH to listen to me and do things properly?

[ByBlueGoose]

Like this morning when we were checking out of a hotel, I wanted to just give the key cards back to reception like you are supposed to but DH kept insisting that he wants to keep them like he always does. I don't understand why he can't just do things properly like everyone else does, like everyone else just gives the key cards back like you are supposed to. I don't even understand why he wants to keep the key cards anyway in the first place. It is always his way or the highway. He never listens to anyone else or their opinions, everything has to be done his way otherwise he kicks off at me. This is just one example, I could give many more, I'm getting fed up of it everyday and it is everyday. If I do or say something that he doesn't like or doesn't want to do then he just kicks off at me. He even tries to control how I parent my DD, she is not his daughter. He just takes over everything and everything has to be the way that he wants it or I get shouted at. Aibu to want DH to listen to me and do things properly? 

[ByBlueGoose]

I can't stand him anymore. The way he tries to tell me how to parent my daughter is what gets to me the most.

[GalileoHumpkins]

It sounds like you both want things to be your way or no way. If my husband kept telling me I wasn't doing things properly I'd lose my temper.
You seem incompatible really.

[Rachie1973]

You both sound determined to have your own way.

i have to admit though if my partner kept telling me how to do it properly I’d get pretty pissed off too.

[Aquamarine1029]

Why are you allowing your daughter to be raised in a toxic environment like this? I suggest you start putting her first.

[ByBlueGoose]

Another example is when I tell DD she's had enough treats for today and then DH tells me he thinks she hasn't and gives her loads more. That's another example.

[Pocketfullofdogtreats]

Why on earth does he want to keep the key cards? They will just clutter up the house and he'll forget where he got them anyway. I hoard all sorts of bits of paper (boarding passes etc) but I don't understand this

[itsjustbiology]

And yet you are still together playing this charade of a loving marriage.

[GalileoHumpkins]

@Pocketfullofdogtreats

Why on earth does he want to keep the key cards? They will just clutter up the house and he'll forget where he got them anyway. I hoard all sorts of bits of paper (boarding passes etc) but I don't understand this

How will key cards clutter up the house anymore than random bits of paper, how big do you think they are?
Maybe he's a scrapbooker!!

[ByBlueGoose]

@Pocketfullofdogtreats

Why on earth does he want to keep the key cards? They will just clutter up the house and he'll forget where he got them anyway. I hoard all sorts of bits of paper (boarding passes etc) but I don't understand this

I have no idea why he wants to keep them, this is why it annoyed me so much

[PerfectTravelTote]

I voted yabu because you're unreasonable to think he's going to listen to you and change. He is what he is.

Yanbu, however, if you decide not to live with this behaviour anymore.

[allfurcoatnoknickers]

@Pocketfullofdogtreats

Why on earth does he want to keep the key cards? They will just clutter up the house and he'll forget where he got them anyway. I hoard all sorts of bits of paper (boarding passes etc) but I don't understand this

I keep the key cards from posh hotels . They're a little memento from a fun or memorable trip. I don't think it's that weird...

[ltappleby]

I think you need to leave. The key card issue is annoying me just reading about it!

[toomuchfaff]

why are you letting your partner parent your child?

[LifeExperience]

"He even tries to control how I parent my DD, she is not his daughter."

THAT is where you need to draw the line. He does not get to countermand your parenting. Woman up and get rid. Why are letting him do that to your child? 

[Italianita]

YABU

1. For putting up with being shouted at (abuse)
2. Putting up with him controlling your parenting

[cestlavielife]

It does not matter about hotel keys

The other stuff maybe

[Churchview]

I can't stand him anymore.

It sounds like everything else is a symptom of this.

[kaben]

@Rachie1973

You both sound determined to have your own way.

i have to admit though if my partner kept telling me how to do it properly I’d get pretty pissed off too.

I'm not sure the OP wants it her own way - she wants things the proper way. Nicking key cards is plain stupid. He can't use them for anything and the hotel then have to replace them, which costs them and the environment. I'd find this highly unattractive and really stupid.

[PhoenixReincarnated]

Do your daughter a favour and get rid of him.

[cheeseandketchupsandwich]

@ByBlueGoose

"I can't stand him anymore."

Your words.

Enough said, no?

[PonyPatter44]

It's not about key cards, is it? It's about him undermining you, having a go at you and making your life unpleasant. Why do you want to stay with him, and what does he bring to your life? What is stopping you leaving?

[ShadesofPoachedSmoke]

He just takes over everything and everything has to be the way that he wants it or I get shouted at.

Controlling, heading rapidly towards abusive. Shouting at you on a regular basis is NOT acceptable.

I'd dump him before it gets any worse. Truly. Your daughter is learning the model for her future relationships from you two - do you want her to be shouted at, ignored, undermined every day?

[SherrieElmer]

He may want to keep the cards as mementos. Weird, but I have seen worse.

[TiptoeTess]

@allfurcoatnoknickers

I keep the key cards from posh hotels . They're a little memento from a fun or memorable trip. I don't think it's that weird...

I’ve never heard of anyone doing this before; it’s pretty weird to me!

[Charlingspont]

@SherrieElmer

He may want to keep the cards as mementos. Weird, but I have seen worse.

I agree, I think it's weird too.

But more unpleasant is his demand avoidance, and always having to oppose whatever you say. Exhausting and boring for you.

Get rid of him.