Can you be friends with a young guy?

[TennisM3]

A guy started in sour workplace, about 2 years ago. He is 27 and I'm 49. We share an office and honestly we have great chats - usually about lots of deep things, philosophy, etc or he might talk about his girlfriend and me DH and kids etc.

It sounds really weird but we have the same vibe/emotional frequency and I find him such good company, he lightens my souls. He also said he really enjoys the chats too!

It is nothing weird but I find I have massive affection for him, like I care he is doing ok, like a friend would.

But can you honestly be close friends to someone much younger/opposite sex? I find I'm pulling away a bit more as it might seem a bit weird, I don't know. Thoughts?

What if it was? A perfectly healthy and lively sounding friendship between two people of the opposite sex who happen to have a lot in common? What's your point?

When I was in my 20s in London a very old couple were our near neighbours. They gave us 2 pieces of advice a) always take a blessing from anyone of any faith (we were all atheists) which isn't relevant here and 2)always make friends with people in the generations below. Because you might get to the point when all your contemporaries have died. I've failed conspicuously to follow their advice but they made a good point.
Don't let it tip over into something it's not tho

Of course. My direct report is a man 30 years younger than me. We get on well, great vibe. Whyever not?

Your kids are young teenage so he's what, a decade older than them? He's more than a few years older. But also, why can't you have a friendship with someone a generation out? Certainly at work lots of the women I got on with had kids my age. I wouldn't have called them my bff but certainly in work we had a close relationship

I tend to make friends because of shared interests or worldviews, or shared activities we both enjoy. Left-wing politics, literature and good restaurants aren't really limited to any particular demographic so when I was younger, I made friends with middle-aged people (at least I thought 30-year-olds were middle-aged when I was 20!) and now I'm in my late 30s I make friends with 20-somethings. Obviously both men and women. And as a PP said, in the workplace everyone is sort of ageless and you just end up bonding with whoever.

(It seems to be an article of faith elsewhere on MN that when younger men in relationships make good workplace friends it's never with middle-aged women... except it very often is, this kind of dynamic is quite common in my experience. DP's best workplace buddy is a brilliant and very formidable Greek lady in her 60s, I would like to be like her when I grow up.)

I agree. When DH was in his early 30s, his company acquired another company and there was a ‘team-building’ day of surpassing awfulness where he met a woman in her late 50s. They were good friends and saw one another outside of work until she died, far too young.

I seem to have become the aunty figure to several of my daughters male friends. They've been visiting since they were all at uni together and some if them come and talk to me about issues. I don't even have to offer advice that much, just listen while they go over it in their head. Once they've talked it through they usually have an answer and I get chocolate and flowers on my birthday/Christmas.

Of course you can, although the lighting up your soul stuff sounds too intense, regardless of age and gender.

Because generally on MN a male 22 years senior to a young woman and having affection for her would be flamed!! Be honest!