Child violent when waking him up.

[Nana99]

I had to take an important phonecall (NHS test results) and left my son on the sofa in front of the tv for 15 mins. Came downstairs and he had fallen asleep. Had a few occasions where he's fallen asleep either in the car or in his room at an inconvenient time. He's got sleep apnoea so is tired a lot, waiting to Have grommets put in and adenoids/tonsils out.

Whenever I wake him up, he gets incredibly violent. Screaming at the top of his lungs, shouting, punching, kicking, etc. He's awake but it's like he's possessed. It'll go on for 20+ mins until he calms down. Very unusual behaviour for him.

Is there some sort of link between a child being woken up and being very violent? I do my best to keep him awake but there are times when I have to make tea, take a call, do laundry etc and he just falls asleep because he's so knackered.

Curious to know if anyone else experiences the same?

Did you need to wake him up?

That's really odd. What does he say afterwards, when he's calmed down?

How old is he?

Yes because it was 4pm and if I left him he would have been asleep for hours and awake in the middle of the night. I've tried letting him sleep before but it just makes the evening/next day hellish.

He's 5. He usually says something like 'mummy can be go to the park' or asks for a cuddle. Normal stuff.

Never experienced this with mine. I wouldn't tolerate it if it did happen. Does he have SEN? I appreciate that might make a difference.

He may be having terrors

you don't mention how old the child is but in my experience as a parent and nurse this is rather common.
one of my three was like this, first noticed when we were toilet training and we would wake her at 10-11pm for a quick wee.

But he remembers it, is fully conscious of having done it?

He's got suspected ADHD (runs in family) and sleep apnoea.

Yes I was going to say neurodivergence - adhd also don't rule out ASD. It's quite common.

My sister has asd, me and my brother have adhd (dad likely too).

I know that sleep apnoea can make people very grumpy as it interrupts the sleep so it may be that when he's fallen asleep in the day he's gone into a deep sleep so may probably feel horrendous when woken although totally understand you need to wake him! Does he get angry about anything else?

Sounds like sleep inertia.

Obviously keep yourself safe but also give him some grace, a snack and some time to come around.

Yes but nothing like this. It's the same when I wake him up in the morning for school.

My kids - cried and got angry if I had to wake them up in the day. Not kicking me but would kick out and scream for a good ten - twenty minutes. But only from a nap never after a full nights sleep. They grew out of it - mainly because they no longer nap in the day. But it's not nice being woken from a deep sleep - so maybe it's just that?

Could be sleep inertia.

My son used to wake up from a nap angry, though not violent. It would resolve itself in 10-20mins once he'd got over the grogginess.

Could you leave him a drink / snack and just leave him be (but stay close) until he perks up? It should stop when daytime sleep is no longer needed