DH ignores my list and buys me a cheap watch

[Bluesky91]

I specifically told DH what I wanted. It was my birthday 2 days ago, he bought me a cheap watch that I hate. I’m not a watch person.

He saw the disappointment, but ignores it. Yet, he didn’t bother getting me something that I really want at 1/2 the price.

I just don’t get it. Why would anyone do this?

He NEVER bought me anything expensive ever! Money isn’t a problem.

Let me put it this way, High end watch in a low end cheap brand. Would you not choose an entry level watch in an expensive brand!!?

You're going to have to ask him. It's the only way or it will happen again and again. What's the point of him asking what you want only to ignore it?

I agree. Politely tell him that it isn't your style and ask for the receipt so you can get a refund.

Giving someone "a list" of what you want is a bit tacky tho, so perhaps he wasn't impressed by that. It all sounds very transactional, especially for a couple.

I would just tell him that watches aren't your "thing" and ask him for the receipt so you can return it/swap it.

Can’t return it. Bought abroad. I can’t believe he went shopping on a business trip to buy something I definitely won’t like.

I’d rather have something I like and cherish than have a “gift” just sitting at the back of a wardrobe.

Not really, especially if you haven't a clue what your partner likes, as is the case here.

OP, what does he say when you talk about it?

Well if he buys crap presents it’s a sensible idea and not “tacky” at all. Wasting money on an unwanted item and expecting gratitude is arguably more “tacky”.

He’s bought it at the airport walking through duty free and it has saved him having to ‘shop’ for the thing you actually want. Tosser. He’s done it out of laziness.

Just tell him you don't want to do gifts in future and then buy your own stuff. Better than getting a gift you don't like and saves thinking up something for him.

It sounds like he doesn’t like you that much.

the things I asked for : it takes 5 mins to just order, relatively very easy to buy, probably half the cost.

I just don’t get it.

You cant control him or what he buys. You can ask for something, sure, but no way to fully control this and get exactly what you want, unless you buy it for yourself in future.

If you dont want the gift sitting in your wardrobe, either sell it or give it away to someone who might be more grateful.

We could be dead tomorrow, don't waste this precious time moaning about a present.

the things I asked for : it takes 5 mins to just order, relatively very easy to buy, probably half the cost.

Then order them yourself. You already know what you want and know it wont be a surprise so order it yourself. Ask him for the money. Done

Not everyone gets it right (I'm looking at you, DH) so why waste the money?

I'd just shove it in a drawer and go out and buy what I wanted. His problem if he's that thoughtless

What happens on his birthday?

I never understand the 'dead tomorrow' argument

She's not actually moaning about a present though, she's moaning about the fact that her DH chooses not to make her happy when to do so would have been simple and easy. That's a very inexplicable choice if he loves her, therefore to have done what he's done indicates that he doesn't in fact want to make her happy, or love her. That's the most logical conclusion I'd think. But sometimes I'm too black and white.

I'd be pissed off op.
I do a list now and thankfully my DH choses from it. Nowt expensive, just a few books I want to read, stuff like candles... just a list of relatively cheap stuff but stuff I'd want and use.
I don't think it's 'tacky' making a list if you know someone struggles to get good gifts. I'm not just gonna sit there and be disappointed every birthday and Christmas.
Especially not when I really try hard for him with his gifts. And I know he likes and uses them.
DH is wonderful in many ways but gift buying is not his forte. I don't take offense because he shows me in many other ways that he cares about me.

But I agree that I would be pissed off if I know that so I give a specific list and he still just buys some shite I have no interest in. It's doubly offensive because he hasn't listening to you telling him clearly what you want and he also doesn't seem to know you at all when he's trued to guess.

Does he want it to be a surprise (in a good way) so doesn't buy from your list for that reason? Is he all pleased with himself when you're opening it? Does he genuinely think he's done a good thing?

Or does he maybe not get the whole birthday thing? Do his family celebrate birthdays?

What kind of gifts do you get him? Is he generally happy and grateful when receiving gifts.

Or is he just a knob who couldn't care less?

Maybe he had already bought it before you gave him the list?

If you are not a watch person I assume that means you didn't already own one. So perhaps he noticed this and thought "I know, Bluesky doesn't have a watch. I will get her one for her birthday." So he could have given it more thought than you credit him for.

As to whether it is high end, low end, cheap. Who has a clue? I always wear a watch. Feel naked without one. But definitely don't care how much it costs so long as it works and has a nice, easy to read face. Had to replace my old one recently and I got a perfectly good one from TKMax for £20. I don't get why brand matters.

Put it on eBay.
But yourself what you actually want.
Stop buying thoughtful gifts for DH.

Tell him your ordering it yourself from him and he's wrapping it and giving it to you. It's depressing but my utterly hopeless ( probably asd) husband is 100% useless so this hairband. I do alternatively send him distaste emails each containing one link to a thing I want. He can just about handle this- sometimes.

There's nothing wrong with lists because some men are just not capable, they really aren't. I received a large man's briefcase- apparently there is no difference between this and a small handbag and he liked it😵‍💫 I also received a pair of size 18 knickers, they were very nice, but I'm a size 8. This was baffling to him. A list is safer!!

I mean, he doesn't need to be impressed but he's the one who got his wife a watch when she never actually wears them.