annual performance review - what to say?

[motheronthedancefloor]

My annual performance review is coming up and there are a couple of questions that have me stumped. I want to be honest, but I also don't want to come across as defensive or blame anyone. Ideally, I'd like some advice on how to word my answers in a fair and constructive way.

Here are the specific questions:

• What did not work well in the last year?
• What do you need to enjoy work better?

Honestly, a project where I supported another team didn't go smoothly. They were (and perhaps still are) understaffed, which is why I was brought in to help. My manager clearly outlined the scope of my support, but colleagues in the other team kept coming to me for additional tasks that seemed outside that initial agreement.

I did raise this with my manager, but initially, he dismissed my concerns and said it was "my job to help people." This made me feel like I couldn't say no, and my workload grew significantly. This, in turn, impacted the quality and output of my actual job.

Things got worse because colleagues, and even their manager, would contact me outside of work hours – late evenings or right before deadlines. This constant pressure seriously impacted my work-life balance.

Exhausted and frustrated, I snapped at my manager one day. This led to an informal warning about my "communication style." While I apologised, I also reiterated the unreasonable demands on my time. This time, he said he'd address it with the other manager.

However, my manager has also told me to "step back" from helping others (despite previously encouraging it) and to improve my time management (difficult with the workload). He even suggested a project management course, which I can't afford right now.

On top of everything, there were some technological issues that caused me stress and delays.

Overall, I feel like my manager hasn't been proactive in noticing my workload and burnout. He hasn't fully listened to my concerns, and I believe he could have intervened much sooner.

While I want to be honest during the review, I'm unsure if this is the right forum to raise these concerns. I also don't want the review to solely focus on perceived shortcomings.

So, my question is: How can I word my answers fairly and ensure a balanced performance review without sounding defensive? Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

Go in with a solution rather than a complaint for the first situation

eg I was asked to help out x team and because of differing expectations about the level of support needed tensions arose. This has been a valuable learning opportunity as I will make sure upfront that there are clear boundaries on what my involvement will be.

You could then build on this for the enjoy work more
Clear understanding of my workload from
management

Support for any prioritisation decisions I need to make to manage competing tasks

Paid courses to develop project management skills

That sounds like an awful experience OP. It sounds like your manager handled things very poorly. Are you able to hint at what sector you work in?

In my workplace, there should be no surprises in the annual appraisal- it is more a format to look at overall performance. The situation that you outlined sounds like it needs a meeting to focus on just that- I'm unclear whether this has happened? Has the work with the other team ended, or is this still ongoing?

In terms of what went badly for this review, I would acknowledge my snappy communication and outline a plan to improve this, as you have already admitted you were a bit snappy. If your workplace offers any training or resources around communication you could plan to use those.

it might be too obvious if I say the sector I work in but its a large national organisation and the support for the other team is ongoing

Would it possibly be a national service that focuses on health. Or at least maybe government run?

not public sector

You could say

• what didn't go well last year was project xx. I felt that the team asked me to do work which was outside of my scope and I did not feel supported in how best to address the situation which resulted in my snapping under pressure. Going forward I will be sure to raise concerns in writing at the earliest possible moment so that these can be properly addressed.
• to enjoy work better , I would like to have a regular well being check-in. I have a tendancy to take too much on and struggle to say no which results in stress. I'd like to regularly review this with you so that we can identify early warning signs in future

Hold on, he suggested a project management course but you'd have to pay for it? Cheeky fucker.

If you've any interest in doing the course, request that at their expense. If they can't afford basic staff training, leave the sinking ship.

I should add I did put my concerns in writing, many times, but got told my emails were 'essays' and all I needed to do was 'take a step back' but of course nothing changed, they, and their own manager, kept piling on the extra work.

I see

Your manager is a twit

You absolutely should not pay out for a management course that you can't afford

I would follow the advice to arrive at the review with solutions. Explain you felt that managing your workload has tough with the added pressure of the new project. This would involve:

• a regular, scheduled appointment with your manager to discuss issues and progress on the collaborative project. Also enables you to present your workload and ask him what needs to be prioritised. My experience is that wellbeing check ins are pointless with these sorts of twits- keep it work focused and oresent it to him that way. Make your excessive workload HIS problem. Write notes during the meeting and share them with him afterwards so you have this documented

• writing a clear guideline about the scope and expectations of my role in the collaborative project (if this doesn't already exist)

• can you ask for feedback from the other manager? Are they happy with your performance?

• push on his previous suggestion of attending a management course and ask if there are funds for this?

Edit- sorry OP, was writing my reply as you posted your update.Defintely make prioritising your workload his problem and make sure its documented. More broadly, do you actually enjoy this job and is it work the increasing stress?

I do enjoy my job but the workload has been too high and I've been questioning myself and how good I am lately. The other manager is known as a bully, which is part of the problem, her team look to me for help, not their manager and I'm not even at her level or in a managerial role at all.

Sorry OP that sounds terrible.

I'd honestly start looking at other opportunities as it sounds unlikely that you will get much practical help and support from either of these people. You are already talking about unreasonable workloads, stress and questioning yourself. It probably is only going to get worse and I think you are a risk of becoming overwhelmed and stressed. The other team contacting you outside your work is outrageous.

You could approach your manager's manager or raise the issue with HR, but this will be a stressful process and you'd need to evaluate whether it's worth the hassle in relation to the likely outcomes. Others with more HR experience would likely be able to advise

Time to polish up your cv I’d say…..