Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take daughter on holiday in term time?

248 replies

ELW12 · 14/04/2024 09:12

Exactly what the title says basically.
We were looking at going on holiday during the May half term, but the prices are just so out of reach for us. Daughter is in Reception so this has been the first year of having the issue of school holiday prices, and the problem we face is having to decide on either not going on holiday at all, or taking her out for the week before May half term.
I obviously appreciate education is very important, but surely it is important to make memories as a family as well? If we could afford to take her in half term then of course we would. Is it THAT bad for us to do it during school? I was thinking of asking her teacher if we could take some work with us so she doesn’t massively miss out.
Also, is it best to be honest with the school and just accept the fine? I feel like daughter will be far to excited to not let it slip, and also don’t like the idea of asking her to lie so we can pretend she is ill!

OP posts:
CelesteCunningham · 14/04/2024 11:23

MariaVT65 · 14/04/2024 11:18

It’s not a ‘these days’ thing though. I went to primary school in the 90s and we got taken out for holidays. It was fine and will still be fine now. No ‘self entitlement’.

Show quote history

And as I and others have posted, still normal in Ireland and other parts of the UK.

Okbyethen · 14/04/2024 11:24

Just be honest and say you're going on holiday. I've done it several times and will continue to do so (never more than a week though)

MinervaMcGonagallsCat · 14/04/2024 11:25

We've gone in term time nearly every year till this year - exams for eldest.

We always tell the truth and the primary school always reply to wish us a good holiday.

But we are in Scotland where there are no fines and about a third of people do the same according to a recent news report.

NamelessNinja · 14/04/2024 11:29

Only on Mumsnet do people complain so much about this. She's tiny and has good attendance - do it! I agree don't expect teachers to do anything extra though. We do it every year (4 days out so not to get fined) and it's never been authorized but the school wish us a good time and his teacher last year said she would do the same if she wasn't a teacher.
I'm not going to pretend my kids get cultural experiences on family holidays at their current ages (6&3) but they absolutely love them. It's the highlight of my eldest's year and he counts down to them and talks about them all year. We wouldn't be able to afford it in term time and what they love is the pool and beach in the sunshine which they wouldn't get in the UK, which probably wouldn't be a lot cheaper anyway!

PTSDBarbiegirl · 14/04/2024 11:30

Djmaggie · 14/04/2024 10:24

I’ve taken DS out of school for the last couple of days of the summer term often since he was in reception. He is Yr 6 now so we haven’t this year and won’t going forward but in earlier primary school, I don’t see the issue. It can save £800-1000 for missing 2 days of colouring in. There is generally no active learning happening in the last couple of days. Go and enjoy your holiday!

Thank the lord you are not my children's teacher!! 2 days of colouring in...... Lol.

pelotonaddiction · 14/04/2024 11:34

Comedycook · 14/04/2024 10:43

I mean you have 12-14 years of schooling ahead of you. Are you going to do this every year? Also you are setting up your DD to have a superiority complex whereby the rules don't apply to her. Imagine if we all did this and teachers had to help 30 kids catch up on work.

I didn't realise how much things have changed (I don't have DC)
My parents took me out of school every January for 10 day holiday and I was set work to do too (unless I had my own coursework/revision). From the time I started school to age 14

RoomOfRequirement · 14/04/2024 11:36

I'd do it in a heartbeat.

Kinshipug · 14/04/2024 11:37

My DS has a total of 4 days unauthorized absences. One was for a family funeral. These rules have naff all to do with what is best for children.
It is criminalizing parents as a distraction and abdication of responsibility for the sorry state of schools.

VioletLemon · 14/04/2024 11:42

LadyDaisy42 · 14/04/2024 11:11

@ELW12 So you're still expecting to rely on others to provide a system for your child not to fall behind because of the choices you make?

Agree! What 'system' will close the gap on the 2 weeks teaching input your child will miss. Does every other child faff about in class upon your return so the teacher can work 1:1 with your child. Take your child on holiday but don't expect anyone else to mop up. I'd take my child but accept its nobody's responsibility expect mine!

Original poster
ELW12 · 14/04/2024 11:48

VioletLemon · 14/04/2024 11:42

Agree! What 'system' will close the gap on the 2 weeks teaching input your child will miss. Does every other child faff about in class upon your return so the teacher can work 1:1 with your child. Take your child on holiday but don't expect anyone else to mop up. I'd take my child but accept its nobody's responsibility expect mine!

Show quote history

Where have I said I’m expecting anyone to ‘mop up’ 🤦🏼‍♀️ I’ve posted many times saying I’m more then happy to take stuff from home so she doesn’t fall behind and I wouldn’t ask her teacher for anything!!

OP posts:
Djmaggie · 14/04/2024 11:53

PTSDBarbiegirl · 14/04/2024 11:30

Thank the lord you are not my children's teacher!! 2 days of colouring in...... Lol.

Show quote history

I’m not a Teacher but all my Sons school do in the last 2 days of the summer term is colouring in and playing games, emptying their trays etc. All of the sports days etc. have already happened and there are no lessons missed.

Notonmy · 14/04/2024 11:54

I think that under the circumstances you should do it, normally I would be against it. My DP was also very ill when my children were young and became too ill to do anything before he passed away.
Also, since then I have worried about money , so we have not been abroad for 12 years, but finally last year we had a big blow out holiday and it was amazing for my family. I will look at doing it again this year, as although we need to save money, having a family holiday abroad was amazing and I had actually forgotten just how good it could be.
I do agree that you should not expect any special actions from the school to catch your child up though.

Georgethecat1 · 14/04/2024 12:04

Do it! I have teachers as friends and they would do it if they could. Providing she’s not behind or has bad attendance it’s a no brainer.

Do not ask the teachers for any work is the golden rule. Be up front and tell them too put in the correct paperwork.

To be fined you need 10 absence’s which is 1 morning and 1 evening so 1 full week (providing shes 5 before April otherwise you can’t be fined yet). So plan your holiday from the Tuesday before may half term or till the Thursday after half term which would be 8 absences and you can’t be fined.

SockQueen · 14/04/2024 12:09

ELW12 · 14/04/2024 10:01

Ok I get your point, just sometimes I can’t help but think as mothers, we (in most situations, obviously there is adoption etc as well) but we grew our children for 9 months, went through the ordeal of labour, spent countless sleepless nights whilst they were babies, changed hundreds of nappies, kept them warm, kept them fed, tuck them in every single night, make them feel loved every single day and worried about them to such extents. I make sure my daughter’s attendance is excellent and I make sure we read every single night before bed. I put my heart and soul in to my daughter, she is my absolute world. Yet to a school she is just a number, an attendance percentage etc etc..but because of that then I shouldn’t take her on holiday on a plane which she would be SO excited for? Again, I get that education is one of the most important things you can give a child and I am grateful that our children are entitled to free education. BUT it shouldn’t be what life revolves around entirely. If someone WANTS to go and do something like one week of holiday, as long as it wouldn’t have a huge affect which I know for my daughter it wouldn’t - then honestly why the hell not? Life is just too short!!!

Show quote history

I don't really have very strong feelings about term time holidays, but this post is just self-congratulatory bullshit. Most of us don't get to do what we WANT (your capitals) all the time, for a huge range of reasons. If you've decided that the impact on your daughter's education is minimal enough that it doesn't outweigh the benefits of a cheaper holiday then go for it, but don't try to waffle your way into convincing everyone that you're doing something noble. "Making memories" is also a largely bullshit concept dreamed up by influencers to sell us stuff - she won't remember much of this holiday in a few years.

FWIW I took my two (Y2 and Reception) out of school for a week this term to go skiing. The fine was £120 so nowhere near the inflated cost of going at half term. But DS1 broke his leg, so that holiday has cost us lots more both in immediate medical costs, psychological upset and now even worse attendance for him thanks to all his medical appointments. So I don't think we'll do it again as I'm too worried about what the karmic retribution might be next time! Blush (Yes, this is anecdote and not evidence at all, but I feel guilty as hell)

cerebuswannabe · 14/04/2024 12:12

Do it. I'm taking mine out for a week in June.

Longma · 14/04/2024 12:15

It's just annoying when i choose to take my holidays out of school time and there are parents with families around who think the school rules do not apply to them.

Why on earth would you assume 'in school time' means there will be no children around?!

Under 5s, not yet at school.
Children who are not in formal school-caused education ie alternative provision, home education
Different holidays and INSET across the country
Children who have parents in professions which mean the holiday is authorised
Difference holidays across all countries across the world
Different school holiday rules across the world
Different starting ages across the world
Etc

It's like someone saying 'I'm annoyed that I go in holiday in school holiday time and there are people there without children with them' - would be equally as strange to me.

If you dint want families and children at your hotel/resort - select adults only. That's the only way you can guarantee it.

Flossflower · 14/04/2024 12:18

Mademetoxic · 14/04/2024 10:38

I am entitled to my opinion. I find it really annoying when parents think that school rules do not apply to them and take them out constantly.

Show quote history

The children that you see in school holidays could go to private school that have really long holidays.

Anonymous2025 · 14/04/2024 12:19

Go , enjoy ! I’m lucky to live in Scotland and everyone I now just takes them out a few days for holidays .

Roselilly36 · 14/04/2024 12:19

Yep, do it.

Longma · 14/04/2024 12:19

Comedycook · 14/04/2024 10:51

And if you teach your DC the important of education, they'll be much more likely to be able to afford to go on holiday in school holidays once they're older

Hmm. Due to my dad's work place we could only take family holidays in term time. We did 1-2 weeks a year in term time. We couldn't afford abroad but had uk based caravan, holiday let type holidays in England .

All three of us went on to do well at school. We all have good exam and degrees. We all have decent jobs I have always worked in education and have taught for almost 30 years now. My own dd has gone into teaching too.

Education and its importance was always a big thing in my house growing up. But it was balanced with other priorities and healthy attitudes as well.

Shoes232 · 14/04/2024 12:23

I mean take her don’t lie accept the fine that’s your choice but please don’t ask for extra work and expect the teacher to work harder for you going on holiday.

chillycat · 14/04/2024 12:28

Tristar15 · 14/04/2024 09:20

Don’t ask the teacher for any work, it isn’t fair to increase their work load for your choices. I wouldn’t take my child out. Your DD will miss out on a week’s worth of phonics where it is highly likely a new sound will be covered. What are you going to do in future years? I suggest you save up and have an overseas holiday once every two years. I’ve just been during Easter holidays, much cheaper than May half term and July / August.

This is a great explanation plus the social implications of taking a child out of reception for a week. Adjust your holiday expectations

Mrttyl · 14/04/2024 12:30

’Making memories’ with someone who will be too young to remember the holiday is a pretty lame excuse for missing school. However it saves money and holidays are fun.

Sayingitstraight · 14/04/2024 12:31

We always take ours out, tell the school we are going away on holiday. But our kids are bright and can catch up. Just do it.

MariaVT65 · 14/04/2024 12:37

Mrttyl · 14/04/2024 12:30

’Making memories’ with someone who will be too young to remember the holiday is a pretty lame excuse for missing school. However it saves money and holidays are fun.

The kid is nearly 5. Of course she’ll have some memory of it.