Is this a fair division of chores?

[SmokeyWigwams]

Parent 1 works full time, 4 days a week at home and 1 in the office.
Parent 2 stays at home.

In the morning, parent 1 gets the toddler up, washed and dressed. Parent 2 gets breakfast for everyone and washes it up.
Parent 2 does most daily household chores (cooking, shopping, cleaning).
Parent 1 washes up after dinner and does the 1 year old's full bedtime routine (bath, pyjamas, story, teeth...). Parent 1 also deals with the bins, all DIY and quite a lot of household admin.

YANBU - sounds fair
YABU - not fair

@Tomblyboo

I think every morning and evening routine is a bit much for person 1 who works full time. It sounds like parent 2 gets to clock off after eating dinner and therefore gets more rest time.
So you think once the 'working person' gets home they get to clock off whilst the SAHP doesn't get to clock off at the same time?
You think P1 works FULL TIME but P2 doesn't? Have we really not moved past this? You think cleaning and cooking and looking after a toddler ALL DAY is not full time? Most experts l jobs have more free time to have a coffee or a lunch break than being a parent if a toddler where you can't even piss without toddler coming with you.

God knows after a day of looking after a toddler P2 will be brain dead and need the rest as much if not more so than P1
It is possible that the toddler evening shift could he split up and shared but if P2 did it all P1 would not be parenting at all M-F and I'm sure they want to spend some time with their child.

I think Parent 1 might be doing slightly more than I’d expect.

I’d expect one parent to do the washing up / clear up, whilst the other got the toddler to bed. And I think if they do all the life admin that’s a bit much- are you sure Parent 2 isn’t doing any of it but just not recognising it?

Otherwise seems broadly fair

@smellslikecinnamon

My gosh, that's a needlessly aggressive response and I did NOT say parent 1 should clock off straight after work, I said they should try to get equal down time.

It sounds pretty fair I think in those circumstances and with parent 1 having been offered the opportunity to not do the bedtime routine. Is one of you unhappy and what is it they feel they need? It might be alone time but it might be handing over some things to keep on top of like I dunno... Do the toddler's clothes/shoes fit or are their fave snacks in stock...

I was once working full time and doing every bedtime for my 13 month old while my husband was a sahd and I struggled a lot with the lack of down time, and felt incredibly guilty for feeling like that. Our daughter was still breastfeeding and only wanted me after I'd been gone all day. Sometimes I couldn't leave her until after my bedtime. I've had my turn being the one staying home too so I do have experience of both, everybody getting some downtime however you can manage is important.

Yes I think it sounds a bit fairer with the further responses. But I think you both need equal downtime, and work back from there.