To be at the end of tether with DPs snoring

[toddlermam]

I literally cannot cope anymore. I am in tears most nights, that's not an exaggeration. We live in a small house to the point where I can hear his snoring if I am downstairs and he's upstairs and vice versa. I honestly never knew it was possible for someone to snore so loudly? It is actually insane!

I have a young, disabled child so I can't wear earplugs or anything as I need to be able to listen out for him in the night (DP is an extremely heavy sleeper, he genuinely wouldn't wake up to our child calling out)

DP is awaiting a doctor's appointment but they're like gold dust at our GP surgery. I suspect the main reason for the snoring getting worse is probably because he's put on about 2-3 stone since we met.

I'm getting hardly any sleep most nights, sleeping on the sofa doesn't help because I can literally still hear him! I'm out of options and starting to feel incredibly depressed. It wakes me up every hour and sometimes keeps me up all night. I just need some sleep 😢

If you do the cooking, get him on a diet! No need to tell him 😂

You can also get some sprays and things from Boots which might help.

Hope the doctor can help. My OH snores and it can be grotty laying there listening to them. And even worse when he wakes up saying how he didn’t sleep a wink 😂🤯😂🙃

@toddlermam , this has been ,with the exception of a disabled child; my experience for decades. I cannot recall in the last 40 years a good nights sleep.

OP, it sounds like you are in desperate need of help. I went through a full 7 nights of getting no sleep due to my DH's snoring, and found myself hovering over him on the 7th night, with a pillow held in both hands, about to suffocate him! I think I shouted, something like 'I can't stand this fucking noise for another moment, I've had enough', which thankfully woke him up, otherwise I might still have been serving a prison sentence. People laugh when I tell them about it now, but I was absolutely serious, and think that unless you've been through it yourself, you can't fully understand how awful this can be. So I have a few suggestions, that hopefully might help or give you some other ideas of how to cope.

First of all, do you have any friends or relatives nearby where he could sleep for a few days, so that you can get some proper sleep, even if you do need to be 'on call' for your child?

Secondly, because you can't wear ear plugs, I would suggest going to your local pharmacy and seeing what they can suggest. There are various appliances that can be bought over the counter, which may or may not help. Obviously I don't know what you may have tried already.

Does he snore in a particular position? If so, and he wears PJ's then try the trick of a tennis ball attached to the PJ jacket, if he doesn't wear them, make him wear a T shirt, with the tennis ball instead.

Your DH clearly needs to lose weight, and if he's the one snoring he needs to be the one sleeping on the couch or whatever, as what sleep you DO get, needs to be good quality.

Other than that, phone your GP, and tell the receptionist that you need an EMERGENCY appointment, and when they ask why, tell them that it's private and you'd prefer to talk to the doctor as it's embarrassing, that should shut them up. I think you should both attend, and explain to your GP that you're at your absolute wits end, and fear that you might actually kill him, if you don't get some sleep, as failure to get good sleep for a continuous period, is actually a form of torture.

I DO hope you can get some good sleep soon, but if you can't sleep, then make sure you frequently wake him up, so that he doesn't either, at least that way, he'll have some understanding of what you're going through!

I can entirely sympathise as my DH’s snoring was unbearable, during his sleep study it measured the same as if power tools were used in the same room. He’s now on a CPAP and is silent, bar the machines noise which is minimal. Fingers crossed the GP sorts something soon for you

Those nasal strips help my DH with his snoring. He has also cut out alcohol. These two things have helped tremendously.

Definitely ask the GP to refer for a sleep study and CPAP consultation. Go private if you can. It may affect driving for a while but will be absolutely life changing.

My husband snores for England, if I'm downstairs I can hear him snoring upstairs. We sleep in separate rooms and I sleep with ear plugs. He has a mouth guard that was made by his dentist which he doesn't like wearing but it definitely cuts down a lot of the noise. If we are somewhere where we have to share a room he will wear it and it's doable.

DH snores, fortunately only in some positions but because he is slim there’s no room for losing weight to sort the snoring.

But I do wake him up mercilessly every time he wakes me up. Snoring itself is a serious health risk - sleep apnea contributes to high blood pressure and significantly increases risk of cardiovascular diseases. Plus the sleep of the snoring person is also affected, the body doesn’t get enough oxygen because of snoring. Overall it’s more serious than just the power drill noises.

If your H is overweight I would expect him to lose weight pronto because this is something that often solves the problem forever. Please make sure that your problem becomes his problem first! He should be the one making sure he takes steps for the family to sleep in peace.