To be paranoid about this ?

[CinnamonWhirls]

I am 38. Unmarried, no kids. As soon as people meet me (knowing my age) they always assume I either live with parents or alone. Would you feel paranoid about this ? Surely most would assume I lived with a partner ?
May sound stupid but I have also had a hairdresser ask me the other month “So have you ever had a boyfriend or had one but it didn’t last long ?” Fair enough this time she didn’t know my age (And I am often told I look a LOT younger) but as with the above cases they did all know my age so why make this assumption ?

we can’t answer because we’ve never met you op

but if this happens almost every time you meet someone new then 1. you are surrounded by rude people 2. perhaps there is something about you that does lead one to wonder if you live independently or still with your parents 🤷

You said it happened about 4 times. How many other times it didn't happen? I bet it was more.

Going off peoples assumptions about you I would guess that you come across as 'innocent' or childlike or not very worldly. Perhaps it is just that you are very softly spoken and not very forthright. It's hard to say really without knowing you.

I think LemonFawn is tour hairdresser!

Bloody rude of your hairdresser and it reflects badly on her, not you.

As you look younger than your age, maybe you look less 'lived in' than the rest of us with children! You may be giving off a different impression. I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing.

If I saw someone well turned out and equally immaculate at all times of day, really polished etc - I may subconsciously assume they didn't have children and were single.

You need to look up the definition of paranoia

How do people know your age so quickly?
I'm really struggling to picture how these conversations are going.

When I got to a certain age I found people always assumed I was married even though I don't wear rings (because I'm not married!) always get called Mrs Bonnet by doctors etc.

It’s happened four times? Surely you must have met hundreds of people over the years so on just four occasions it’s happened? Sometimes we focus on things we are sensitive about and are a big deal to us eg if you are single and live with parents/never had a long term relationship etc and you judge yourself, then hearing it from someone else hurts all the more and stands out. If it’s not something that bothers you, then you probably don’t even register it being asked.

People know my age through work. I work with vulnerable people and families so everyone is aware of how old I am when we first meet.
I know all this sounds paranoid but I just worry how people are viewing me.

@CinnamonWhirls is this something you're insecure/worried about? Which might be why you notice it more/give it more weight? 4 instances out of how many? Tens?dozens? Hundreds?

Safer recruitment checks, age is displayed on various documents.