Annoyed at partner for helping friend?

[clarefloers]

I had an appointment at 12 today and my partner finishes early on Wednesdays hence why it was booked for 12.

All of a sudden his work mate broke down and needed petrol and my partner decided to go and help him making me completely miss my appointment.

This appointment is very important and I have had to wait weeks to even get it.

My partner is saying I'm being childish as it's his friend.

But his friend'a wife just charged him £20 to do a CV so can't be that much of a friend when a CV takes 5 minutes using a template.

We have a 5 month old baby and he takes the only car to work so I would have had to wait for him.

I am so annoyed.
AIBU?

He's out of order. You are his partner, which should trump a friend. Couldn't you have got a taxi? Not that you should need to because his friend could have easily got a taxi and done a round trip.

The only babyseat is in the car that we share.
Otherwise I would have caught a taxi.

So he knew full well you wouldn't make your appointment but he wasn't arsed?

YANBU. His friend could have walked to a garage, got a taxi, called the AA. Or just waited.

Suppose it depends what sort of stuff his work mate has bailed him out of in the past and how urgent his need was. There are people who I would find hard to refuse a request for help from because they have really helped me in the past. Don't most people have breakdown cover these days ?

Don't most taxis carry child seats these days or you can ask for one on ordering ?

Most taxi's just let you sit with baby on your lap

Assuming that you had no alternative means of getting to your appointment without your partner, then YANBU at all. Even if it hadn't been a particularly important appointment, your partner would still have been out of order.

I find it hard to believe that his friend doesn't have anyone else who could help him get petrol, and if he doesn't, then your partner should have said 'I can help you out but only after I've taken Clarefloers to her appointment'.

I don't think the £20 CV charge is really relevant; it was the friend's wife, not the friend, and if that's one of the ways she makes her money it's perfectly OK for her to charge. But that's neither here nor there really, because either way, your partner was still a dickhead!

There were many things he could have done to make sure you got there (take the baby with him, leave the car and go by cab, loads more). He did none.

Which means he's either actively sabotaging your health or he doesn't care about you at all. Which do you think it is?

Just because they let you, that doesn't mean it's safe.

As we don't know how far away the OP's appointment was, what the taxi situation is like where she lives, how much notice her partner gave her and how long the wait for a taxi would have been, suggesting that she should have got a taxi is a moot point anyway. And if taxis are easy to come by, then her partner's friend should have phoned for one to take him to the garage for a can of bloody petrol.

Oh I find know taxi's had baby seats and that you could request them.
I rarely catch taxi'a

Yeah partner was moaning about paying for a CV as they are very friendly and partner has even had the work mate shower here and lets him stay over with he is drunk.

Do not ever take a baby on your lap in a taxi. A friend of mines son is severely disabled for life because of this exact scenario.

Of course he shouldn't have changed arrangements making you miss your appointment, but you are being so so unreasonable dismissing the help friend's wife gave. If it's so easy using a template, why didn't you/he do it yourselves
? So, I'm wondering if we actually have the full story here.

Yeah I did ask why his mate's wife couldn't just pick him or call AA.

He didn't even call, I was just left waiting.

The friend's situation wasn't time dependent but your appointment was. I'd be furious in your position.

He didn’t even ring you?! That’s appalling.

Does he disapprove of the appointment?

I would be very very pissed off.

You weren't even a consideration, let alone a priority.

I would be fucking furious if my DH prioritised someone who had been disorganised enough to run out of petrol over me in that situation, tbh. YANBU.

A cv does not take 5 minutes using a template, especially if you are switching industries

I'd be far more than annoyed at him. He's prioritised a friend's needs over yours.

The CV is irrelevant, but I think you're right to be fuming and he is behaving even worse by not acknowledging that he cocked up and let you down.

The CV is irrelevant, but I wouldn't fancy my chances of getting a job with a CV that took 5 minutes. I usually spend rather longer than that checking and updating my existing CV, tailoring it to the job I'm applying for.

Not calling you to let you know is the really bad part, if he'd let you know you could have found another way to get there on time.