To stop DC going to dads house if not baby proofed

[Greenhouse12]

My DS is 2 years old and his dad lives in a apartment with windows in rooms down to the floor his dad casually mentioned getting cord blinds installed which I said isn’t safe for children as even a 6 year old was on the news long ago having somehow got caught.

His has has always been the fun parent and not particularly aware whereas I’m relatively cautious I don’t have stairgates but do child lock cupboards with chemicals and I’m always vigilant for anything he could slip/trip or choke on.

how would other parents proceed in this situation?

im just a bit worried as his dad will literally sit on his phone not look up for 5 minutes and just put cartoons on or he will go toilet (for up to 10 minutes) and close the door and leave our toddler in rooms alone

I should add he’s not an awful parent by any means just the ‘fun parent’

If he has parental responsibility and shared custody, all you can do is explain what your concerns are and what is suitable to try to protect against your worries.

Blind companies usually won’t sell you blinds with cords that are long enough to risk strangulation, I’ve ordered several for some very high windows where I’ve had to prove the height of my windows before they’ll send me ones I can reach myself!

Could he be persuaded to
go on a First aid course for babies / children that might help his awareness of household dangers?

As above. He gets to parent his child as he sees fit, just like you do.

You cant withhold your child because he wont do the things you do. You shouldn't anyway.

Closer to two or three? Isn't all baby proofing gone by three unless the child is developmentally delayed? I didn't baby proof anything aside from a stairgate used from six to nine months. I wouldn't worry at two personally.

My ex used to have a totally unsuitable home when my DD was a baby and my parents were freaking out at the thought of my DD going there to have visits with him.

From what I can recall at the time though, I don't think there's anything you can enforce as such. You can make baby proofing suggestions, or suggest alternative places for him to have his visits or suggest supervised visits etc.
Unless it's actively dangerous or there's a real cause for concern though, I don't think there's anything you can implement for when his child is in his care.

I feel your pain though OP.

We don’t have any parental arrangements nor is court involves most of the time we’re civil

im not really withholding my child I just want him to be safe when I’m not around respectfully my child has literally choked in his dads hands and all he’s done is pass him to me.

DS turned 2 just 3 weeks ago

Thank you for your reply even if there’s nothing I can do it’s nice to have someone empathize. I’ll follow your advice and try make gentle suggestions

Blinds cords these days come with connectors that break if pressure is put on them to prevent strangulation. I have a command hook I loop one of my cords over as it doesn't have a connector. It's to prevent my cats getting caught on it.

You don’t have a say in this, assuming he has PR.

We have had blinds installed recently, they are children-proofed with hooks (so not hanging freely, the cord is tightly fitted against the wall) and the installer told us there was a link somewhere that would open under a certain weight (can't remember exactly but it was about the weight of my then 2yo).