Dp going away with brothers?

31 replies

Holliegee · 07/04/2024 21:05

So, this year is a very big birthday for me, my past life was quite dysfunctional and birthdays always bring about a lot of emotion for me.
Dp has arranged to go away with his brothers for 5 days to celebrate his brothers birthday the very weekend of my birthday.
aibu to be a bit fed up? I have no other family except my son to see during this time.
im
quite prepared to be told I’m a marry arse !! But I’m feeling a bit emotional about it.

OP posts:

InTheRainOnATrain · 07/04/2024 21:34

Holliegee · 07/04/2024 21:25

He will be here on my actual day but I’ll be at work because it’s midweek (sorry if I’ve misled anyone) it’s the weekend of my birthday when we would usually do something.

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That’s entirely different then. He’s not away on your birthday and you have the preceding weekend to do whatever you want to celebrate- and do make sure you do something good since it’s a big one! Then he’s away the following weekend, no big deal.

Azerothi · 07/04/2024 21:34

Ponderingwindow · 07/04/2024 21:29

There will be plenty of people along to tell you that an adult expecting their significant other to be present on their birthday is just a spoiled brat. Please ignore them.

my XH used to do This all the time. My parents did it almost every year, taking an adults only trip. My birthday is adjacent and sometimes on a holiday weekend and it is just ever so convenient for people to want to travel. It makes it pretty clear where you stand in that person’s ranking of priorities .

The boyfriend is there for the birthday.

Shoxfordian · 07/04/2024 21:35

If its the weekend before or after then you can do something the other weekend or book some time off work and do something

He does seem a bit thoughtless. Does he usually get you a nice present at least?

Dishwashersaurous · 07/04/2024 21:36

So he will be there on your birthday. You can go out for dinner etc. Or even take the day off.

Then he is.away one of the weekends close to your birthday.

So if you want a weekend celebration do it on the other one

MissUltraViolet · 07/04/2024 21:36

Sorry OP but I think, after the update, YABU. He WILL be with you on your birthday. Just do your 'birthday weekend' the weekend before or after, which ever one he is home for.

Scarramoosh · 07/04/2024 21:44

I was on your side until the latest drip fed update.

He WILL be there on your actual birthday.

You would ordinarily go out for a meal on the weekend if your birthday falls midweek. Just change that to the weekend before, or the weekend after he gets back.

I think you're being very precious here. And I'm also someone with childhood issues that cause me emotional vulnerability on special occasions, including my birthday. But this situation wouldn't have me feeling abandoned because he would be there on my actual birthday, and any outings would just be done on another weekend.

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