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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I overthinking? ? How do u change that

3 replies

ivise · 07/04/2024 08:23

So me and my cousin meet up regularly , we have kids who loves to play together, mostly we meet up at my house because I end up asking to come over,because she barely asks to come to hers,unless I mention, anyways I always end up cooking dinner for us and kids because of the time she comes, we normally like to have a drink and she knows that , which mostly again I pay for , if I mention do u have anything to tip she say oh I don't have any money which she has she just always so tight when it comes to gatherings and that annoys me, and she knows we are worse off and struggling financially atm,if I go to hers I bring my own drinks even to her own parties , if she comes to mine I end up always cooking and getting drink(she has done few times but mostly not ), also what annoys me she never wants to hang outside the house with kids like other friends , she will just say oh don't have money but then send me pics of her having drink or new order of clothes, I don't mind what she spends but I just think this is now one way friendship, but because of kids loves playing together and she is family I feel hard to just ignore her,we always mention about meeting up but it's me who ends up inviting to my house ,I have told her that she needs make effort too but since then it kind of got worse 😄
Tbh it's not only me from family who has mentioned of her never contributing, people always feel awkward when it comes to gathering because she will never offer any contribution to food or drinks , but she knows if she comes people will offer her out of politeness of her being there u know , otherwise it would be rude not to

OP posts:
Auntieobem · 07/04/2024 08:24

A full stop once in a while wouldn't hurt.

PotatoPudding · 07/04/2024 08:32

Would it really kill you not to crack open a bottle when she’s round? If you’re struggling financially, can you really afford to drink? I never understand people who struggle but can’t give up vices, then try to justify it with ‘it’s my only luxury’ or some such rubbish.

Revelatio · 07/04/2024 08:42

Do you mean an alcoholic drink? When she comes just offer water and make a simple tomato pasta.

The children can then still have fun together and you won’t be out of pocket.

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