sorry this is a very long post -
have a very close friend who I have been friends with for a number of years now. Little back story - we would message everyday, meet up often, our young children are close, FaceTime, be there for each other no matter what, literally know the in’s and out’s of each others lives, basically like sisters. We both did not have huge friendship circles outside of this but a few friends (separate).
Just over a year ago, she said to me “I envy those women with big groups of friends” - fine I’m sure we have all felt like this time to time but then she found these friends not so long after at a school she had sent her DS too. This is when she started to change. She suddenly stopped replying to messages, and if she did she would overlook any questions on my side, she stopped responding to me asking if she wanted to catch up etc and when it got to my birthday I asked her 3x to meet up for it before I gave up. I asked in between if everything was okay on her side as she was very distant and she said all is well - fine. I asked her again a couple of weeks later as I was fed up of feeling like I was chasing a friend and she got very angry with me, saying how she can’t just be there at my beck and call and she is busy with her children to answer my messages (she is online on WhatsApp constantly). Her message was aggressive and defensive and rather arrogant and it really upset me. I don’t feel a true friend would respond in this way!
Anyway fast forward to jan and i grieved the friendship and accepted that things were no longer the same and these new friends took priority over our friendship which apparently was not genuine. She text me that month to say “get ready for Godmother duties in August” - I was so confused! I responded saying you still want me to be DD god mum? We haven’t really been talking and I didn’t feel you liked me very much anymore! She said “are you kidding your my fave person in the whole world” which really confused me
Ever since she has been texting me a little more but I can’t help but feel she pushed me away too much in the last year to then suddenly pull me back in. She is always seeing these new friends, I went to her party last Saturday where she didn’t introduce me to a single one of them (and one of them recognised me from photos and just wanted to comment on how “short” I am!!) She is going to the beach this weekend with her new friends for her DS birthday and hasn’t asked me to come along.
She forgot about my DD’s birthday recently (this wouldn’t happen in our world usually) and still hasn’t bothered to send a card. A lot of other stuff has happened but I would be here all day writing it if I carried on
basically AIBU to want to close off the friendship? Just to add she dropped her maid of honour in the same way when me and her became closer. At the time I thought maybe they just fell out but now I can see she has done the same to me!
i think I just need some perspective and a good vent for being treated so badly as a friend when all iv been is there for her and respectful in our friendship!
thanks for reading if you got this far