To think blended families work better when the children are younger?

[Garlickkk]

Generally speaking, obviously there will be exceptions. I have a few friends who are step parents and I am also one myself. The ones who came into their stepchildrens lives when they were older (as in teenagers) seem to have a much more difficult time of it. Mainly in the sense that they just can't bond with the children and end up hating them being around (because let's face it, teens are difficult). Whereas, in my own scenario, and that of others I know, meeting my DSC when they were younger children (youngest was 6 when we met), I at least had the opportunity to meet them when they actually wanted to spend time with us, were quite cute and sweet still, wanted to come out on family days etc etc.. Looking at my DSC now, as teenagers who rarely have any interest at all in spending time with us and spend 99% of their time either with friends or in their room, I don't think I could really bond with them if at all if I were to have met them now and I can understand how if you entered the situation now you could end up hating them being there having all of the shit that comes with teens, attitude, mess etc etc but none of the memories / bond from younger years spent together. Aibu to imagine most of the time it's far easier if you "blend" when children are younger rather than older?

Probably easier as the children grown up with the step parent so will ideally have a close relationship.

As opposed to meeting when kids are teens and trying to develop a relationship

This is exactly what I was trying to say. Not that it's harder because older children have their own opinions and younger ones don't as PPs have said.

But knowing my DSC now and how they behave as teenagers, I don't know how I could possibly build up a strong bond with them if I were to meet then now. Mainly due to the fact that they rarely want to know us / not cool to hang out with your parent.

Whereas meeting them when they were younger, whilst obviously still hard work as all young children can be, there was the opportunity there to build a bond through shared time together, time spent together, days out, baking, crafts, hugs after a cut knee etc..

My friends with step children they met as teens just seem to not really like / have any sort of relationship with them at all and I get how that happens with teens.