Going on holiday and feeling fat

[CrazyMumyy]

5 years ago I was 8 stones and today I’m 11 stones 12lb. I really wanted to lose weight before this holiday but everyday stuffed my face. In taxi going to airport and I’m really upset. I don’t want to take any pictures when we’re there. I don’t even want to get in the pool. Has anyone else felt like this? I just feel disgusting. I see how DH looks at me when I was trying clothes on for this holiday. I feel and look disgusting. How can I not wreck the holiday for my kids in particular? I want to be happy and upbeat but just feel like hiding away. About 30 minutes to airport now.

I feel exactly like you right now

Due to go hols at end of month

I feel your pain xx

I totally understand but you have to stop your weight controlling your happiness. Acceptance is hard but this is your right now and that’s good enough. Have a lovely holiday and come back rested and ready to focus on your health.

STOP! When you get on holiday there's a huge mixture of people of all sizes round the pool. I can't remember one of them or their bodies and I've never ever looked at anyone bigger and thought any negative. When I was overweight I done the same as you then as soon as you're on holiday, it really doesn't matter. Just go enjoy yourself and do NOT stress any more!

Thank you everyone for your responses. Yes I know I need to just accept it but it’s so hard! I’ve never been this big. My maternity bikini wouldn’t fit me! I’m actually bigger now than I was during both my pregnancies.

You aren’t your weight and don’t let your enjoyment be spoilt by it. Look outwards as there are so many people of different shapes and sizes and no-one cares about yours. Stand proud for yourself and your children. Get in the pool, have fun with the kids and that is what everyone will remember.

Oh hunny I’m exactly the same. Please don’t tell yourself you’re disgusting, I can guarantee that you’re beautiful. Weight bares no reflective on who you are.

give yourself the pep talk that you’d give others in this situation.

you go and have a ball, get in that pool and enjoy yourselves, nobody keeps you and in my experience people are too busy worrying about how they look themselves to worry about anyone else.

Your kids literally don’t care what you look like or how much you weigh. They will know whether or not you join in, smile and interact with them on holiday and your negative mood about your weight is the only thing going to make it bad. Not your weight.
No one will care.

Floaty clothes. Colourful sarongs to wear over your bikini/swim suit. Smile and be happy. Own the space your fabulous body lives in. You look great. Nobody cares what size you are (except you so you need to fix that in your head).

Have a super holiday and a nice big cocktail.

Same.

Am 12st 3 and feel huge :(

You are so lucky to be going on holiday. Enjoy it

11st 12lbs isn't overweight. You're just a curvier version of yourself, and I know as I currently weigh the same as you :) my husband would never look at me the way you've described, that's awful for you.

You dont need to change your weight, you need to change your husband.

Xx

It really doesn't matter, no one cares or judges other people on holiday. The only person judging you is yourself. You've likely worked hard to pay for this holiday and you deserve to enjoy it not be berating yourself.

The only people I remember from holidays or even notice are the ones we end up chatting to and having a laugh with.

You're more than just a body. I swear NO one will be judging you or thinking badly of you for your physical appearance. Go to the airport and have a wine or cocktail and stop the negative thoughts of yourself. As soon as they start think of something/anything else. Read a book, just do something else to distract yourself from the negative voice in your head and change the monologue - You're going on holiday, you're going to have fun, it's going to be sunny, you're having quality family time and the kids will enjoy themselves, that's all that matters.

Right. Stop NOW. You don’t need to “accept it”, you can do something about it, but not until you get back. No one ever loses weight on holiday! What you CAN do is fake it til you make it. So, do not hide away under baggy t shirts and skulk around trying to hide the bits you don’t like. FAKE IT. Head up, shoulders back, act like you feel completely proud and you own the joint. NOTHING looks as good on a woman as confidence. And your weight has nothing to do with who you are as a person. Are you kind, loyal, honest, decent? 8 stone or 18 stone won’t, can’t and will never change that. Be proud of who you are and bloody show it! Go op, you can absolutely do this! Xx

Right.

I'm bigger than you, I'm 14 stone. Do I deserve to have a great holiday and splash about in the pool and do what I like with my well-earned break? Or should I hide my disgusting body away and hate myself into a different body?

Then what should you do?

I was you last year (actually heavier as I was 12 st9 at 5ft 5). I did my best on holiday to enjoy myself and then I got home and focussed on changes and I’m now 4 stone lighter a year on. Currently on holiday and it feels good to not be worrying about my body, not to mention physically I’m fitter. But your weight is not your worth and you can’t change anything now so just plaster a smile on, enjoy your trip and ponder if you want to make lifestyle changes after the holiday.

And as PP said, I’m round the pool and people are every shape and size.

Oh op I know how you feel but please don’t let it spoil your holiday. Your dh shouldn’t be looking at you any way at all except with love. You have borne his dc fhs! He should be supporting you, not making you feel badly about yourself when you already feel awful.

Hold your head up high op. As others have said, your worth is not dependent on your weight.

Your dc love you for who you are, they don’t care what you look like. Go and have a good time for their sake if not your own 🌷🌷🌷 but try and have a good time for yourself too! You deserve it! And remember, no one hates themselves thin. It’s easier to lose wait when you are in a good head space so relax and have fun!

Last summer I felt awful on a last minute holiday - since then I’ve lost weight, and have more to lose before the summer. Nothing you can do for this holiday, yes no-one else will care but I know you will but try and forget about your weight for now and get a plan together for when you’re back

are you the same height as OP? I’m short and 11st 12lbs is very overweight for me. Someone who is 5ft and someone who is 5ft 8 are going to look very different at the same weight

That’s not particularly helpful to this thread or to anyone really.

Right stop it now, you've got 2 choices, you either quit the guilt and enjoy your holiday and take action to change your circumstances.
OR
you carry on with this self loathing and ruin your holiday - guess what, you'll still not be slimmer tomorrow, but by next week you'll have had a shit holiday and still be fat.

Self loathing does nothing. Do something useful, enjoy your holiday, make some amazing memories and make some good food decisions with the aim to making progress from this point forward.

This with bells on. I'm at least 3 stone overweight and carry it all around my middle. I'm basically a barrel on legs. Last year I bought a bikini when on holiday and stopped giving any fucks. It was absolutely liberating. The joy of not being in a massive one-piece and drying out quick more than made up for the apprehension and feeling like my boobs were out. No-one cast me a second look.

@Zanatdy how unhelpful. Whether op is 5ft or 6ft 6 she feels shit. Let’s ALL try to make her feel better eh?

I go on a beach holiday every two or three years. There are always women who weigh much more than you do in their swimsuits/bikinis enjoying themselves and not giving a fuck about their size. That's because they know nobody cares what other people look like. They know that everyone is too busy enjoying their own holiday to give them anything more than a passing glance.

Making untrue statements doesn’t help. People here saying she’s not fat because someone else same weight isn’t will not help her in the slightest, in fact I’d imagine she feels worse, but likely because there’s a huge height difference

I don't know how tall you are but you are hardly morbidly obese ....loads of people are slightly overweight. No one cares. You need to remember most people aren't thinking about you as much as you think they are.