Bracelet

[Divocedwithkids]

I’ve been seeing my boyfriend (both in our 40s) between 6-12 months. Everything’s going well and I really enjoy our time together. We see each other a couple of times a week. We are both really busy with our own kids so more would be difficult.

I have trust issues due to how I’ve been treated in the past which he knows about and has assured me that he will always be 100% honest and faithful.

One of his close friends, who doesn’t live locally, is a girl who he asked out approx 5 years ago. She wasn’t interested and nothing has ever happened. We’ve had one long chat about it all and another smaller one. I think he does still have some feelings for her but knows it will never happen. She is very flirty & has a lot of male friends. When we met she was friendly to me.

However, they both wear a bracelet from an event they went to together. I know it seems small but it bothers me. I don’t think I can say anything & he does wear another bracelet (I’m not sure of the significance of it).

He does know that I’m wary of his relationship with this friend as we’ve talked about it. I couldn’t stop him seeing this friend and wouldn’t want to as I know friends are important.

Am I being unreasonable for feeling bothered about him wearing the bracelet?
Would you say something?

No. I wouldn’t police something he wore that has significance to him and a friend he’s known for years.

It’s not up to anyone else in your life to compensate or make up for how other people have treated you in the past. That’s work you need to do with and for yourself, or you’re going to poison this and any future relationship with your expectations, jealousy and lack of trust.

It’s a bracelet. Whether he wears it or not, they still went to the event together and he still asked her out years ago. None of that is going to change. If it wasn’t the bracelet you latched onto it would be something else - hence why you need to focus on working through your own issues.

The bracelets are just souvenirs from the event, though, surely? They’re not a symbol of their undying affection for one another.

Like a festival, concert or something? Unless the event they attended was their own wedding I don’t really see the issue.

If at this age a relationship would make me feel like that, I would not want to continue.
Doesn't really matter why or who. It is clear you are not at ease.
Better to be single and care free.