To say that just because you can have your wedding outside in March…

[Forwardthinkingcrayfish]

… it doesn’t mean you should?

Wedding is tomorrow and the weather forecast is 12 degrees with winds ranging between 20mph and 40mph where we are, but no rain. I’m involved at the venue. Guests will be outside and suppliers/musicians are booked to serve/perform outside for the ceremony and drinks part. Everyone is likely to be absolutely freezing, yet the bride still “has her heart set” on an outdoor wedding. I just don’t see how anyone would enjoy standing outside for 3 hours in wedding attire?!

This is by far not the first wedding in similar circumstances, and won’t be the last. I have no say on the bride’s decision, but I’m putting it out here because I’m curious!

AIBU to think that the comfort of the guests and staff is more important than going ahead with an outdoor wedding whatever the weather?

We once attended a wedding where the ceremony was in the hotels garden. On Saddleworth Moor. In December. It snowed.
I felt so sorry for the bridesmaids, all the guests were wrapped up but the poor girls were turning blue before our eyes.

It's so selfish! Not a single thought given for others' comfort. You can never ever guarantee nice weather in this country.

I was a guest at a wedding Im Scotland in May - the venue was a converted barn on a hilltop. The B&G decided on the day that they would have the ceremony outside as it was sunny. Naturally they didn’t have time to tell any of the guests , so we all turned up dressed for indoors.

Of course the weather in Scotland changes every 5 mins and by the time the staff had carried all the seats inside, it was cloudy and the wind was picking up.

Everyone was absolutely freezing by the time the ceremony even started. I was lucky that I had an outdoor coat in the back of the car but most of the younger women were just wearing thin strappy mini dresses and heels with bare legs ( as was the fashion ). Many of the men were wearing kilts so they gave their ( warm wool) kilt jackets to their partners and sat there trying look manly and not shiver in their shirt sleeve . The bridesmaids were in thin chiffon dresses and they shook with the cold while the wind howled around us.

No one heard a word of the vows etc as it was too windy and of course there was no PA system.

There were two 80 something grandmothers there - one went inside and the other sat in the front row refusing to do the same - she did want to miss it and let down her great GD the bride.

I can’t imagine what went through the heads of the B&G watching a tiny 80 year old lady shake with the cold just so they could have their “ special moment “. Completely and utterly selfish and reckless.

I feel so so sorry for you OP. I wouldn’t willingly be outside in the cold for anybody’s wedding. Can you sneak a hot water bottle under your jacket?

No one heard a word of the vows etc as it was too windy and of course there was no PA system.

Yes! Their “meaningful” ceremony which is so special it has to be outside, cannot be heard by anyone other than the bride and groom.

This thread has been cathartic for me, thanks OP!

I attended an outdoor wedding many years ago and it was freezing 🥶
DH (he was just my DP at the time) and I were in our 20’s and dressed inappropriately as we hadn’t really given it much thought.
I remember him taking his suit jacket off and giving it to me as my teeth were chattering with cold.
The Brides grandma was in a wheelchair and the she had a picnic blanket over her 🫣🤣
The bridesmaids were all in off the shoulder numbers and looked numb with cold.
it was horrific!!!

YANBU OP!
Forget English weather, I'm from a tropical country known for sun, sea and sand. Yet, even we get rain.
Wanting an outdoor wedding is OK as long as there's a backup plan!

YANBU I am cold just thinking about it. I don't think I've taken my coat off outside this year yet so if I was a guest at this wedding I would be keeping it on too and probably bringing a hot water bottle.

I got married in July. It was the only day all summer that it pissed with rain. 🤣 It was indoors with plans to open doors/use outside space (we didn't!)

I agree with those saying you should dress for the weather. There's no rule that says wedding guests can't wear thick tights, warm dresses and boots. Why would you dress inappropriately for any outdoor function? It being a wedding doesn't mean you can't be comfortable.

I guess the issue that a lot of people have had is it’s not clear on the invite that it’s an outdoor ceremony whatever the weather.

Most venues have an indoor/outdoor option so if it’s raining or cold then the guests assume it’s going to be indoors (because surely the bride and groom are thinking about their guests also having a good day) only to turn up and get an unpleasant surprise.

If it’s clear from the invite then there’s no problem (I got invited to a cave wedding that was very clear it was going to be cold and to dress practically), same for the park weddings a previous poster mentioned, but I’ve also been to venues where nothing was said about indoor/outdoor location, the venue is somewhere with indoor options but the wedding is still set up outside despite the chill.

My friend went to an outdoor wedding (that was in the grounds of a hotel but advertised as being at the hotel so all the guests assumed function room etc). The head table had heaters and blankets but the rest of the marquee didn’t/had sides open to the elements. Surely somebody should have thought when making sure the bridal party was warm that maybe the rest of the guests deserved the same courtesy?

If she has her heart set on outside, why book it for March?

It could well be snowing around this timr of year

People will drift inside. You cant stop them . They will drift away

How come it's 3 hours? Isn't the actual ceremony usually just an hour? Is the reception also outside??
I'd wear warm clothes, coat and hat. Not my fault it's outside, is it?

Is this really that big a deal?? Just wear some proper clothes, go and enjoy yourself, and you will be fine. It’s not your wedding!

Considering UK is SO cold and wet, I never understand people’s aversion to the weather here, and think everyone should just be used to it. No such thing as bad weather, just bad clothes! Do you stay indoors for the three quarters of the year that it’s cold here?

I went to an outdoor wedding in the UK in July, and in a heatwave. That was extremely uncomfortable too. 34c. Not what we are used to in this country 😂
Outdoor weddings are overrated.

I think I'd be making my apologies for this one!

She mentioned suppliers and servers in the OP, so yes reception too. As PP have pointed out the servers and musicians are unlikely to be able to wear coats.

I think most people get to a point when the relentless bad weather becomes tiresome.

We like walking, but it is just too muddy at the moment, even in the correct clothes and footwear, to enjoy walking anywhere that isn't paved. This reduces our options considerably, and we can't wait for dryer weather so that we can enjoy walking in woods and fields again.

That 'bad clothes' thing is only true if you're rich. Clothes that keep you warm in very cold weather cost a lot of money. 'Fashion' gloves don't work for me, for example, I need thermal lined ones and many companies don't make small gloves. A fashion hat the same thing. I have boots from Decathlon that are supposed to keep your feet warm down to-5. They don't always and on top of that they've very heavy and hard work to walk in.

Now, in March it's not VERY cold, but it's weather for walking around. If you're standing or sitting in one place for 3 hours, you'll be pretty cold without big winter clothes. Like I said, I would wear the big winter clothes, but they won't look very nice in the photos.

I went go an outdoor wedding in May. We usually have lovely weather in May but that year it was horrible. It didn’t rain but it was freezing. The mini patio heaters did nothing and everyone was a bit miserable. The bride and groom loved it but everyone was desperate for the meal indoors to warm up!

That sounds miserable. Poor staff and guests. I'd be leaving as early as possible.

Madness. We got married in June and the ceremony was 'outside' but we hired an open sided marquee to provide shelter and shade. Had the weather been atrocious on the day the marquee providers could have added the walls and made it totally rain and wind proof. The rest of the day was inside with an outdoor option.

Yes, but as pp have said, you're not outside momentarily or going for a walk. It's a function, and it's outside. If you're standing around or sitting down, you're going to be uncomfortable.
People shouldn't do that to guests.

I don't get it - why on earth would anyone in the UK have an outside wedding? Is it for the pictures?.

I'm out in all weathers - but active gardening and walking, wearing appropriate trousers, fleece, goretex jacket, wooly socks and hat, boots, gloves etc as apt.

That's completely different to standing or sitting wearing tolerably nice clothes.