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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to feel let down

12 replies

Nothingandnobody · 27/03/2024 21:11

Over the last couple of years I've felt pretty unimportant to my friends and family. I don't really have anyone who I really matter to. An example is this week I had a job interview and I told a few people. Not a single person wished me luck or asked how it went. This is just one example but pretty much how it always is. I rang one friend to see how she is as she's had a bad week. After we'd talked about her week she asked how mine was and I said I'd had an interview. Even then she didn't ask how it went. I feel like I'm there for everyone else but nobody is there for me. AIBU that people check in on others for stuff like this? I can understand not remembering every time but I've just been left feeling like nobody cares at all. I've had an awful last year or so and don't have anybody in my corner.

OP posts:
Laalaland · 27/03/2024 21:15

That sounds a bit rubbish. Sorry you've had a bad year.

How do you feel about getting out there and creating new connections to make new friends?

What would it be like to gently confront that friend? Something like "I was a little upset that you didn't ask me how my interview went...I know you've got a lot on but it would mean a lot to me for you to ask about me."

Tilllly · 27/03/2024 21:16

That's rubbish, people shld remember important stuff in others lives

Maybe try saying something like, "can you think of me at 2 o'clock tomorrow because I've got an interview, and I need some good vibes"

That might just prompt them to ask how things went and get more into a routine of asking how things in your life are, rather rather than you just been the one to check up on them

K37529 · 27/03/2024 21:21

I wouldn’t take it personally, they probably just have a lot going on in their own lives. Hope the interview went well 💕

Nothingandnobody · 27/03/2024 21:24

Laalaland · 27/03/2024 21:15

That sounds a bit rubbish. Sorry you've had a bad year.

How do you feel about getting out there and creating new connections to make new friends?

What would it be like to gently confront that friend? Something like "I was a little upset that you didn't ask me how my interview went...I know you've got a lot on but it would mean a lot to me for you to ask about me."

I wouldn't do that to her but it does hurt.

OP posts:
Nothingandnobody · 27/03/2024 21:25

K37529 · 27/03/2024 21:21

I wouldn’t take it personally, they probably just have a lot going on in their own lives. Hope the interview went well 💕

Yeah I've got a lot going on in mine too including my best friend dying.

OP posts:
Loubelle70 · 27/03/2024 21:29

I was same...no one asked how i was or wished me well...but they soon contacted me when they needed me...or something...and id ask how they were, how did '*' go?...family does it too...never say are you ok...even when they ring...i always ask if theyre ok. I Got a new group of friends. Family i limit time with.

People take others for granted. Sadly. Its lonely world. Join meetup OP

YourNimblePeachTraybake · 27/03/2024 21:31

Nothingandnobody · 27/03/2024 21:24

I wouldn't do that to her but it does hurt.

But that's not you doing anything bad to her? Just being honest about your feelings. That's how relationships deepen.
I'm very sorry about your best friend.

staceyflack · 27/03/2024 21:35

How did your interview go? 🙂

Nothingandnobody · 27/03/2024 21:37

staceyflack · 27/03/2024 21:35

How did your interview go? 🙂

Not great 😢. Thanks for asking - it means a lot.

OP posts:
bloodyeffinnora · 27/03/2024 21:58

some people are very self centred, so they aren't good friends and never will be. maybe take a step back and stop asking them how they are.
what's the point of having friends who make you feel shit. I'd rather have no friends than crap friends who make you feel bad.

staceyflack · 28/03/2024 12:36

Sorry to hear the interview didn't go as well as you hoped it would. I blooming hate interviews. Feels so forced doesn't it. And if you're anything like me... I know great answers before and after the interview... but rarely during! Chin up... and better luck next time. Buy yourself some flowers 💐 I do, it helps 🙂

staceyflack · 28/03/2024 12:37

And.. i'm very sorry your friend is so poorly x

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