My parents had an extremely unhealthy relationship. They're still very unhealthy, but separated.
I'm a grown woman and I don't blame my parents for how things have turned out for me in my own marriage and life.
But they act disappointed in my choices sometimes and the situation I find myself in.
They think I should have known better - as I'm highly educated and have a good career etc.
Yet whenever I speak to them about anything to do with my own marriage / situation, they agree things aren't great but kind of infer I should have known better and now should just shut up and get on with it.
It's made me think, where do you actually learn what a healthy relationship looks like ? How was I supposed to navigate finding the right partner and know what a healthy relationship looks like, when I've never seen one ? How was I supposed to learn that at say 17 or whenever I had my first relationship ? And later too ? Yeah you talk about things with your friends, they tell you '
Not to put up with ' boys doing XYZ, but instincts are often stronger than what people tell you.
I had a couple of books on relationships - ' why men love bitches ' in my 20s, which were massively eye opening for me, however almost came too late for me too.
How did you learn about good relationships if you never saw a good one ? Why do some of us break the cycle and others don't ? Am I just dumb or something ?