No family at Easter and Christmas WDYD?

[Lambsarehere]

Just that!

My kind and much loved FIL and MIL have now died. BIL died last year, unexpectedly, his wife has already remarried and disappeared with her new husband and we never hear from her and the dc (a whole new thread) All gps have died.

What do you do with pre teens and teens to make family occasions like Easter and Christmas special without family gatherings? We usually feel very sad and lonely as it reminds us of all the family we no longer have. I have tried to make it 'fun' but the teens are not really interested, and I have started to really dread this time of year. The adverts make me feel sad. Christmas is even worse.

We can't afford to go away every year whenever it is Easter, Christmas, mothers days etc, so please don't suggest holidays. We do have lots of friends, but everyone usually sees their own families/GPs etc. I am not sure how to make the holidays feel less painful.

Thank you

You try and see the positives of having a lovely family and celebrate that you have one another and are all together!

I get your pain OP. we've lost 2 parents and siblings and of those left, only 1 has any meaningful contact. People who have family who care are privileged. I think youndo need to focus on creating your own traditions together. Baking, boardgames, karaoke, it doesnt matter what, things which are fun to you all.

Thank you to everyone that has posted. I am sorry for those that also struggle at this time of year.

I will try and make it special, we already started decorating the house and have spring bulbs everywhere. When dc were younger it was much easier to create a fun weekend, now it isn't so easy. But an escape room in a box sounds good and I like the idea of a new game, and a dinner out somewhere too.

I loved my MIL very much, she was always such great fun, so she is missed at this time of year especially. I will check with friends what they are doing too.

Making it more low key would be easiest, in the long run. It might be time for a change!

I'm the same re ex in laws, they were our 'big celebrations' people. i do miss that.

Sorry for your losses @Lambsarehere . hope can use some of the ideas here to make the day special

After my mum died (I was in my 20s) I found it best to do something completely different. Trying to have a family Christmas just reinforced the fact she was gone.

It is the big celebration people that leave the biggest empty space. I kind of dread these family events now. Stargirl, I am so sorry you lost your Mum so young. What do you organise that makes it feel easier now? You are right it can feel worse just ploughing on anyway.

I am wondering if we can go to London or something. Somewhere that is full of life and where it doesn't matter so much that we are by ourselves now.

We love having a little family Christmas (we tried Christmas with my DPs once a couple of years ago and both DCs begged to have it at home with just us in future). We usually have a special roast for Easter as well, and we do go to church including at least one service during Holy Week (this year I think it will probably be just a craft event with DD at church). We also do that with just our family.
I'm not sure what a big family Christmas would gain us except arguments and more cooking TBH. I have never really spent it on my own, though I went to friends rather than family in my 20s when my DPs were struggling a lot (but my DM still expected us to be happy).