Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take 12 months mat leave in this position?

39 replies

saphi3 · 26/03/2024 13:12

DH’s salary covers all our essential outgoings including food and all the bills we must pay.

My salary is slightly lower but what we use for disposable income; covers anything and everything from clothes, shoes, Christmas presents, savings, meals out etc.

I get close to my full wage for the first 7 months, then it’s SMP for 9 weeks then 13 weeks unpaid. We are trying to save a bit now but finding it difficult with everything we will need to buy and also wanting to enjoy some date nights and weekends away before baby comes along.

Would you find it doable to have the full year off given you’ve no disposable income for a good 4/5 months of it? I would do KIT days and DH could do overtime… or AIBU to think I can have so long off?

OP posts:
Lilly11a · 26/03/2024 13:14

I d say honestly if you can't save anything at the moment with 2 wages coming in , you are going to struggle on one .

What is the plan for childcare when you go back to work ?

Amberjane41 · 26/03/2024 13:14

I would think this is entirely up to you whether you can afford it or not. I don’t think a bunch of strangers on the internet could possibly know?! Maybe ask your husband

Mrsttcno1 · 26/03/2024 13:15

Honestly no I wouldn’t do that.

Original poster
saphi3 · 26/03/2024 13:16

Amberjane41 · 26/03/2024 13:14

I would think this is entirely up to you whether you can afford it or not. I don’t think a bunch of strangers on the internet could possibly know?! Maybe ask your husband

There is no need to be rude, you don’t have to comment. I’m posting as it’s not always easy to ask friends and relatives what they did and how they managed money wise in that time, whereas people might be happier sharing on here if a similar situation worked for them

OP posts:
Maryamlouise · 26/03/2024 13:17

I did, worked until due date, took ~10 months mat leave then added my holidays on the end of that so got about a year. We had some savings though so it worked out even when my DP got made redundant and his salary halved at new job.

Original poster
saphi3 · 26/03/2024 13:17

Lilly11a · 26/03/2024 13:14

I d say honestly if you can't save anything at the moment with 2 wages coming in , you are going to struggle on one .

What is the plan for childcare when you go back to work ?

Condensed hours (both), relative help one day a week and childminder for the other two - hopefully the funded hours will give us a small discount

OP posts:
Animalpsb · 26/03/2024 13:19

@saphi3 i was in this exact scenario pretty much, except I had maintenance rather than a proper second income. I took 13 months and it was slightly tight towards the end but I didn’t change and spending habits etc. (And I’m not particularly frugal!). I’d say take as much time as you can!

Strugbug · 26/03/2024 13:19

I’ve just done it in pretty much the exact situation as you and we’ve been fine. It’s been harder with less money at the end but doable. Sit down and do the maths and work out whether it’s viable for you. I absolutely wanted the full 12 months as I knew I’d never be doing it again.

I found I was able to save a lot of my wage during the first few months of full pay and bought a lot of the baby bits of Facebook market place and vinted. Saved a fortune!

MoreDangerousThanAWomanScorned · 26/03/2024 13:20

You should be able to save quite significantly if you're on near full pay for 7 months with no childcare and none of the outgoings associated with work for you.

Also, you can always plan to take 12 months but go back early as long as you give your work notice. I would plan to do that but then be very certain that I know how much notice I had to give to return early so that I could assess honestly if we could afford it prior to that.

Onelifeonly · 26/03/2024 13:21

Ir sounds risky if ypu don't have a decent amount of savings. Will you be paying for childcare when you return to work?

We relied on savings for our first child as my DH's salary was low at the time but I also went back after 4 months.

Minata · 26/03/2024 13:21

I think 4/5 months is a good chunk of time to have no disposable income so I don't think it's a great idea. If something unplanned comes up, then it really becomes stressful. Also with the baby, you might want to do playgroups, trips and outings so you need to factor that in without having disposable income.

DanceMumTaxi · 26/03/2024 13:21

I think you’ll find it tight, especially towards the end. Do you accrue holiday when on maternity leave? Lots of friends have added saved holiday on to the end of their maternity leaves so they can have a bit longer, but with pay. I could do this because I was allowed (teacher), but lots of jobs will let you.

hazelnutlatte · 26/03/2024 13:22

I'd think those final few months will be really difficult if you're struggling to save with 2 wages coming in. However you do accrue annual leave while on mat leave so you should be able to go back after 11 months but take the first month back as annual leave and get full pay for that month, so that should help. If you really want a full 12 months off I'd focus on saving as much as possible now.

Sa11yCinnamon · 26/03/2024 13:24

Can you use annual leave to bump up to a full year? I've got eight weeks' leave and two weeks worth of public holidays, so am taking 10 months mat leave - same deal as you, but only one month (ish) will be completely unpaid and three SMP - I should have enough saved to cover that by the time my full pay runs out.

Also as PP said, I'm getting as much baby stuff from Vinted/Marketplace as possible, which is making a big difference.

Amberjane41 · 26/03/2024 13:24

saphi3 · 26/03/2024 13:16

There is no need to be rude, you don’t have to comment. I’m posting as it’s not always easy to ask friends and relatives what they did and how they managed money wise in that time, whereas people might be happier sharing on here if a similar situation worked for them

Show quote history

How was I rude? You asked a question on a public forum and I answered it! I didn’t say anything nasty or swear.

just my opinion as I don’t know anything about you? Whether you have hobbies you like to do? Are materialistic? Have to have a holiday once a year? Or are you happy staying home! What I say I would do could be completely different to what you would do. Some people I know are happy just in their houses, gardens etc and have a cheaper car and some people like to have everything big, branded and spanking new and like to go out for coffee everyday and don’t like being in on their own. Hence why I said maybe talk to your husband! Don’t think that was rude and in fact I think you are the rude one here for saying that when all I have done is answer your question!

Youcannotbeseriousreally · 26/03/2024 13:28

Are you 100% comfortable that In Order for this to happen your partner will have to work overtime and therefore spend less time with your baby whilst you gain more, does that sound acceptable and fair to you?

RBowmama · 26/03/2024 13:33

If you can take accrued annual leave for the last month or more depending how much leave you have makes it much easier. I think it's do-able, I've just done similar in fact. The last month before annual leave kicked in was tight, didn't splurge massively on dinners out and little treats when out but for one month totally fine, we still did and had lots, just had to pick and choose more carefully than normal. We were able to save more whilst I was pregnant and at the start of my mat leave as similar mat pay to you. Also personally I wouldn't do as much date nights out and maybe just one weekend away before baby comes so you can save more. Or find really good deals online for mini breaks! But honestly having a year off with your baby and away from work is SO lovely. We had a few holidays whilst I was on mat leave too so being able to save beforehand helped massively.

WarshipRocinante · 26/03/2024 13:33

You really have to consider the strain on your partner. Being solely financially responsible for a family isn’t easy, even if everything is going well, it isn’t easy. To be solely financially responsible with a new baby and having literally no spare money for 5 months and having to work overtime, so more tome
away from your new baby…. That is going to be very very hard on him, and you really need to consider the strain it will cause.

It will also mean you at home alone with the baby even more because he’s doing overtime, and you won’t have the spare money to go out and do things during the day.

I would say no, it isn’t sensible. Not unless you can save enough now to cover those last few months.

Cantgetausername87 · 26/03/2024 13:36

It's doable! I was in a similar position with the same mat package. I just used my holiday (work said I had to use before returning) to bolster up the unpaid weeks. Will depend on how much AL you get but I dont think I ended up with many (if any) unpaid weeks x

Sophie3003 · 26/03/2024 13:36

I took 14 months but I did save to cover my lower paid and unpaid times and to sustain the same outgoings etc this amounted to a reasonable amount of money. However if you are able to in a financial sense I would 100% recommend taking the time. Also is worth bearing in mind that employer's do not have to allow you to do KIT days and they need to be mutually agreeable so not to bank on these as a source of earnings.

RomainesToBeSeen · 26/03/2024 13:49

We saved money during those first 6 months of maternity leave that covered the final months on reduced pay.

It mostly came from no commuting costs or fuel, no takeaway work lunches/coffees, not needing smarter clothes/shoes.

In addition we didn't go out for meals much over the first 6 months and probably ate simpler food at home (meal planning made it easier and saved money compared to nipping into Sainsbury's on the way home from work). All those incidentals like collections for birthdays and going for a drink after work also add up.

After the additional expensive items the baby didn't cost much (at least to start with 😂) and we were lucky to be given lots of new/used baby stuff. Baby groups tended to be cheaper local groups rather than the expensive franchises.

It was hard but doable. Also made me realise how much it costs to go to work!

zurg123 · 26/03/2024 13:52

I had 13 months off. I used a weeks annual leave per month for the last 4 months as I had accrued so much so effectively got some money for the full duration of mat leave.

KalaMush · 26/03/2024 13:54

Personally I wouldn't, because there's not that much difference between taking (say) 11 months and 12 months, so it seems pointless to struggle financially to make that happen. Like a pp says you can also add your annual leave on to make it longer.

Babyboomtastic · 26/03/2024 13:58

Honestly, it depends on what sort of maternity leave you want.

Maternity leave CAN be very cheap if you are staying at home a lot, doing very cheap things etc.

Equally it can be very expensive. It's easy to go 'ooh I'll do baby sensory on a Monday, ooh baby swimming on a Tuesday, baby massage on a Wednesday' and then you meet me friends there and inevitably go for cake or lunch after. Or you spend half your life in coffee shops with mum friends or because your need to do somewhere to feed little one...

I didn't do most of the expensive classes, and some baby groups and churches are free or very very cheap. But I did end up going out for lunch or a drink and cake most days. Sometimes both with a baby class sandwiched in between. Gosh, those were the days... Best time of my life. It wasn't cheap though.

But equally, I could have done it a lot cheaper. Walks with a buggy/sling, and a picnic and thermos of tea are free. But it's easy to get sucked in to just one more pub lunch.

It's also cheaper in summer than winter, especially if your baby is just starting to walk.

The best way to judge it is to look at your weekends now. If you are very careful with your spending, take packed lunches, early spontaneously eat out then you'll probably be the same on maternity leave. If you tend to accidentally overspend at weekends now, then maternity leave will be expensive as it's basically a forever weekend.

Ps: the pub lunches and lazy afternoons in a cafe will go by the last bit of maternity leave anyway as you have a more demanding mobile baby. Then they get replaced by play groups and soft play (soft play again costs money, but you'll go less often).

MillshakePickle · 26/03/2024 14:10

I'm currently on mat leave and combined we dont earn a huge amount for where we live in Surrey. Our combined income is often around these parts less than a single income. I've been on stat mat pay.

We had savings and saved up while I was pregnant as well. Things like booze and nights out naturally came to a stop.

I'm currently in the unpaid portion of my mat leave and we have not once (yet) had to use any of our savings. This is including having the heating on 24/7, using more water and electric because I'm home. But we have saved in wrap around child care for dc1 and my commuting costs. Still ha e had holidays and weekends away with more to come before I'm due back to work.

If you're careful about how and where you spend your money.(We bought loads of stuff second hand) It is more than doable. But we spoke about it for hours before I went on mat leave and made a conscious decision to save and be more frugal in certain areas. But I also know we have 6ms plus of bills/mortgage money saved on the off chance we would need it.