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Original poster

What makes you middle class?

632 replies

Singlemum90 · 25/03/2024 23:39

So a comment from my mother a few years ago has stuck with me ever since then really. When I was no longer a single mum, and found myself a little less skint, she said 'oh it's so good now you're just a nice middle class mum, I'm so proud of you'

Aside from her clearly looking down at me before this, and deciding class was what defined how she felt about me- I have often wondered what made her decide I was middle class at this point.

How do you define it? (I feel it's very subjective) Is it what family you are born into? Your income?(And what income makes the 'classes'? Is it a specific job type? The way you stick your finger out when you drink tea?
Or is it just a shitty way to divide people and how they feel about themselves?

OP posts:
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SpaghettiWithaYeti · 02/04/2024 17:22

PresentingMrsFluff · 26/03/2024 09:02

Middle class =

  • Sharp elbows especially in regard to their dc's opportunities
  • Looking at others (in a competitive way) to see what they have and what they do and how you and your dh, and kids compare next to them
  • Comparing your dc with other people's dc with a competitive view
  • Looking down your nose at those you deem lower in social class than what you are aspiring to
  • Seeking to associate with the right kind of people
  • Reading the right books, doing the right activities going on the right kind of holidays (based on what's deemed MC or higher, not based on what they actually enjoy)
  • The fishwife veneer is thin

There you are.

That's aspiring or newly middle class rather than established middle class.

My family have been boringly MC/UC for generations and these kind of "newly arrived" behaviours always stand out to me and I know long before someone tells me that they haven't got MC roots. It's not like I care, I have friends from across the social spectrum, but a desperation to have the right hobbies and go to the right places etc is always noticeable. I just do what I like doing /where what I want to wear etc.

Springtime43 · 02/04/2024 17:55

I thought of something else today - having a cleaner.

I am far too wc to have "staff".

@enchantedsquirrelwood ooooh we have a cleaner too! Maybe this makes us ‘aristocracy’?!

I’m a member of David Lloyd so I suspect I’m borderline ‘landed gentry’ but I do blot my copybook sometimes by going on package holidays …

Superlambaanana · 02/04/2024 19:02

Springtime43 · 02/04/2024 17:55

I thought of something else today - having a cleaner.

I am far too wc to have "staff".

@enchantedsquirrelwood ooooh we have a cleaner too! Maybe this makes us ‘aristocracy’?!

I’m a member of David Lloyd so I suspect I’m borderline ‘landed gentry’ but I do blot my copybook sometimes by going on package holidays …

Oh Jesus, package holidays? Purlease.

Unless it's a Mark Warner one. Only people with money do those 🤣

Springtime43 · 02/04/2024 19:18

Oh Jesus, package holidays? Purlease.

Unless it's a Mark Warner one. Only people with money do those 🤣

@Superlambaanana we’ve done Mark Warner (and TUI …) !!

Bjorkdidit · 02/04/2024 19:32

Yeah it's definitely Middle Class to be snobby about package holidays. It doesn't even mean anything in the days of booking everything yourself online.

A 'package holiday' could be as much a naice villa or boutique hotel and BA flights as it could be an AI mega hotel in Benidrom reached by Easyjet from Luton.

Or you could book it all independently, tell everyone you're staying on a little island of the coast of Africa and in reality be doing AI in Lanzarote.

goldenretrievermum5 · 03/04/2024 01:54

LovelyTheresa · 26/03/2024 08:05

My income, my lifestyle, my sensibilities. I actually consider myself upper middle class although my income doesn't really put me in that bracket. My education level and tastes, however, do. Also my accent, I sound even posher than I am.

Edited

Anyone remotely upper middle class would not be stating how allegedly ‘posh’ they are on MN

Superlambaanana · 03/04/2024 03:43

@goldenretrievermum5 you're late to the party. She's come off with some absolute whoppers, including stating she is definitely upper MC because she 'had the classics read to her at a young age'.

This, coupled with her claiming to be under 40/ born after 1980 made me laugh so much some pee actually came out.

People who say 'I'm the kind of person who X' are almost always in every case the absolute opposite of people who X and she proved that perfectly by being so transparently a chippy, plummy, low class snob.

She's gone away now because nobody curtsied to her, but she was entertaining!

Blueballoons1 · 03/04/2024 19:45

BrondesburyBelle · 27/03/2024 12:56

Haha yes @Janehasamane I am making it up and just musing on my own experiences and family history really. Of course sociologists and economists will have their own definitions but it's a nuanced subject and one I find interesting when life takes me outside of the middle class bubble I usually inhabit. Because of the catchment of my kids' state primary I'm in an area where all the children have exactly the same type of 3 bed house with a garden and therefore similar income families however the class differences are very clear and friendship groups almost entirely organise themselves in terms of accent and cultural outlook. You might say this is just people finding like minded friends but there is a very obvious divide in those with a mc accent who do particular types of extra curriculars and holidays and those who have a wc accent and do other types of things with their disposable cash and time. There is some overlap of course.

@BrondesburyBelle what type of holidays do the mc crowd & non mc crowd do? Examples please!

Papyrophile · 03/04/2024 21:20

In southern France, some people will go to Roman ruins and some will go to the Haribo factory. If you were to visit Usez, which is delightful with a castle, for example, the town's tourist literature will give you a choice between a massive Roman bridge across a major river or a trip to a sweet factory.

Papyrophile · 03/04/2024 21:21

For @BrondesburyBelle .

goldenretrievermum5 · 03/04/2024 21:23

Superlambaanana · 03/04/2024 03:43

@goldenretrievermum5 you're late to the party. She's come off with some absolute whoppers, including stating she is definitely upper MC because she 'had the classics read to her at a young age'.

This, coupled with her claiming to be under 40/ born after 1980 made me laugh so much some pee actually came out.

People who say 'I'm the kind of person who X' are almost always in every case the absolute opposite of people who X and she proved that perfectly by being so transparently a chippy, plummy, low class snob.

She's gone away now because nobody curtsied to her, but she was entertaining!

Only on MN!! 🤣

Papyrophile · 03/04/2024 21:24

If you automatically choose the child-friendly dumbed down option. Not that I think you would.

bombastix · 03/04/2024 21:44

Papyrophile · 03/04/2024 21:20

In southern France, some people will go to Roman ruins and some will go to the Haribo factory. If you were to visit Usez, which is delightful with a castle, for example, the town's tourist literature will give you a choice between a massive Roman bridge across a major river or a trip to a sweet factory.

Edited

I am going to both!

Papyrophile · 03/04/2024 21:54

Have a great time @Bombastix. Usez is completely lovely. But the Pont du Gard gets busy so pick your time carefully.

Papyrophile · 03/04/2024 21:57

I'd be there as it opens, or half an hour before it closes.

cherish123 · 03/04/2024 22:12

I would say it's about educational status, aspirations and type of job (lawyer/doctor/teacher etc - mc; manual jobs - wc). However, within these you can have exceptions. There are other subtle differences (likes, hobbies, social circles, attitudes, beliefs). Accents can play a part, but not always.

EveryoneJapan · 03/04/2024 22:16

Decanting my pasta and cereals into glass jars.

Queenofcarrotflour · 03/04/2024 22:18

Youmusthavebeentoacapulco · 26/03/2024 07:31

The last 2 times we’ve gone out with friends my female friend has driven, I’ve sat next to her and husbands were in the back. What class does that make us?

Show quote history

Criminal underclass

Papyrophile · 03/04/2024 22:18

To display? Open shelves are very on trend @EveryoneJapan .

EveryoneJapan · 03/04/2024 22:21

Papyrophile · 03/04/2024 22:18

To display? Open shelves are very on trend @EveryoneJapan .

Yes, if it’s orzo or organic granola.

In the cupboard if it’s penne or coco pops.

MadraUisce · 03/04/2024 22:22

PrinceLouisWeirdFinger · 26/03/2024 07:01

Working class = whippets and flat caps
Middle class = champagne and avocado on toast
Upper class = anorexia and buggery.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk 😂

😂

isitbananatimealready · 03/04/2024 22:27

BigFluffyHoodie · 26/03/2024 07:03

If you insist that people take their shoes off in your home, you're lower middle class.

What class are you if it doesn't occur to you to ask whether to take your shoes off when in someone else's house?

Superlambaanana · 03/04/2024 22:45

Youmusthavebeentoacapulco
The last 2 times we’ve gone out with friends my female friend has driven, I’ve sat next to her and husbands were in the back. What class does that make us?

Criminal underclass

How did I miss this earlier?!! This is the most progressive thing I've heard ever! I'll see @Queenofcarrotflour's criminal underclass and raise you 'progressive future class'. Love it.

Oldie2 · 03/04/2024 23:33

probably working class

AllPrincessAnneshorses · 03/04/2024 23:41

isitbananatimealready · 03/04/2024 22:27

What class are you if it doesn't occur to you to ask whether to take your shoes off when in someone else's house?

Show quote history

Bad mannered.