Don’t know what to do for the best

[Ilovepugs2017]

We’ve got a westie - we rehomed her around 10 years ago and the previous owner said she was around 7 at that time.

She’s been with us as a family since then but has various problems now due to old age. We’ve discussed between me and DH about the right time to let her go and have spoken to the vets to book an appt to have her put to sleep. The appointment is Wednesday.

We are now both wondering whether it’s the best time for her. Seems so sad to think that she isn’t going to be with us for much longer she’s been such a lovely dog.

How do you know when the right time is?

she has some issues with her eyesight, hearing, isn’t able to enjoy walks that much anymore due to getting tired easily and she has an issue where her back legs keep on giving away when she walks up stairs.

Is now a good time to say goodbye? 😢

It's so hard to judge, even when an animal is ill with a terminal diagnosis.

Generally my rule of thumb is when they appear to be suffering and find no joy or pleasure in their lives, or when they stop eating & drinking.

There are ways to help her continue to enjoy walks & remain mobile, but I don't know if you've already looked into these & put them into practice?

How helpful 🙄

Theres no perfect time, OP. But if her quality of life is steeply declining and she’s not enjoying herself anymore then it’s merciful to let her rest. Better that than she really gets worse and is suffering. I’m sorry you have to make this decision. But it’s kind you’re thinking about what is best for her. ❤️

17 is a wonderful age for a Westie, the fact that you’ve booked the appointment means you know it’s time ❤️❤️

What's cruel?

Keeping a pet alive who won't understand why she's in pain, and can't do all the things she used to?
To allow her to go peacefully and with dignity?

Yeah sounds really cruel to me /s

Can the vet advise? A good vet will help you assess their quality of life and while not obviously want to make the decision for you, can give a professional opinion.

Seems a bit premature ime. Surely keeping her downstairs isn't a big deal? Or carry her up of she sleeps up with you... Old age isn't cause for pts. If she enjoys food and isn't incontinent in any way surely worth a bit more life?

I’d suggest sitting with the dog, get nice and calm. Close your eyes, in your head call the dog over (in your mind) and ask them if they’re ready to leave…..

If in doubt, I’d wait x

Do a quality of life scale. We are going through this at the moment, and have found that it has helped. Uni of Tennessee has a good one, or there is a uk website compassionunderstood.com which is very good.

Better a day too early than a day late. So sorry to you all, sounds like you've given her a lovely life ❤️

Where as for me, if in doubt, I wouldn’t wait.

better a month too soon than a day too late. I have had many elderly animals put to sleep over the years, a) because I live on a smallholding with many animals and b) I have done a lot of foster and adoption work, and that often involves fostering the weak older ones and then they don’t get adopted.

if you feel that your lovely dog is suffering in anyway, or doesn’t have the same joy in life they had at say Christmas time/December, I’d stick with the appointment you’ve made. Well done for being brave.

Westies are such tough little cookies - ours had just turned 18 when she died. If she’s still pottering about the house, eating and drinking and seems fairly content in herself etc then I’d leave her to it - it’s very common for older dogs to have a few issues with steps and stairs or to prefer to stay at home instead of going for walks. However, if she’s showing signs of being in pain or distress and is losing interest in everything, or has to be carried outdoors for a wee, then it’s probably time. I really sympathise; it’s such a difficult decision. Ultimately, you know your dog and whether she seems truly miserable and I’m sure you’ll do the right thing

The last dog we said goodbye to was old and in a lot of pain but I didn't think mentally she was ready to go but for her quality of life we had to do it and that was really hard. The dog before that was nearly 16 and you could see she was tired and ready and it felt totally the right thing. It's never nice but some times it's the kindest thing to do and I echo what others have said, you will know deep down.

Talk to your vet. S/he will be able to assess whether your little dog is in any pain. If she has arthritis, there is medication she can have. Our elderly cat was on some. He was also diabetic, blind in one eye, weak in his back legs, epileptic (controlled) and had had episodes of vestibular disease but omg that boy clung on tightly to his life; he had such a will to live, and he ate like a horse until the day before he died. He just loved to be with us. He slipped away on his own peacefully, having seen the vet just 2 days before. My vet just kept saying, you'll know when it's time.

Like my furball, maybe it's not quite time for your girl, but see what the vet thinks. Best wishes, it's hard.

Better a day too early than a day late

I came on to say what @ChampagneSuperDrinker has done. I am not a dog owner and am not a dog lover - but have a very good friend who is and this is always her mantra. She will not allow an animal in her care to suffer unnecessarily.

It always sticks with me in the context of the assisted dying debate as I think it should apply to consenting adults as well, but that’s another matter.

If you've already maxed out pain meds for her joints and she is still unable to enjoy her walk (a potter and sniff rather than a 15 mile hike, be realistic!) then yes, I'd say it was time. Dogs are very stoic and people often wait far too long.

However, if she's not already on meds to improve her quality of life I'd definitely look at those first.

Thank you all for your input ❤️

Just to answer a couple of the questions - she isn’t incontinent yet and is eating and drinking ok though I have noticed she has lost weight recently.

The last time I spoke to the vet they did say she is a good age for a westie as they tend to last til around 15 years on average.

I don’t want her to go if she can still be ok for a while & enjoy the time she has got left but at the same time I don’t want her to get to the point that she’s in a lot of pain and suffering as I love her too much and would hate to see her in any pain/suffering.

I think the advise to have the vet to do a check on her would be a good idea, at least they can advise about her overall health and that might make it easier to make the decision. I just want what’s best for her ❤️

She’s been such a lovely dog to have and has been amazing with our three children. So loving bless her

So sorry, it’s such a sad and horrible decision to make. But I absolutely agree, better too soon than even a day too late. I kept my 17 year old cat alive too long because he was still eating and drinking. But then he collapsed in a puddle of his own wee and his legs had gone. I wish I had spared him that. I had him pts that day. Still think he’s around, checking in on us! The living room door creaks ominously . . .

I would have a checkup to see if your dog is in any pain and go from there. With what you've said I'd not put my dog down with those symptoms. It's a hard decision to make and one I'm dreading. My cocker spaniel is almost 12 and is suddenly starting to look old :(

The old saying is 'better a week too early than a day too late'. Don't leave it until she is in pain or has a poor quality of life, and make sure you have some nice photos of her.

if she's not in pain and can eat and drink and toilet ok then no it's not time

It is impossible for us to tell you without seeing and knowing your lovely dog. You know her, and will know deep down, even if it is a hard feeling to come to terms with. They always say better a week too early, rather than a day too late.

Plan it in properly, give her a lovely last day with favourite treats and cuddles and if you can be with her, so the last thing she knows is falling asleep with you. It’s so tough, but the best thing we can do to pay them back.xx

I had some great advice from a vet once, who told me that it's often not a right moment, but a right window, when it's neither too soon nor too late. If you're in that window, there's always a risk that it will close faster and sooner than you expect, but in that window you're OK to take your time to think. But at any time in that window it's not too soon.

This helped me....

I am in this position too and it’s heartbreaking. I have made my decision based on the ability of my little dog to enjoy eating food, drinking and general demeanour ( not in pain beyond old age aches and struggles)

My dog is incontinent as well. We use little nappies. She eats and drinks well, sleeps a lot, enjoys quick walks and being alive. We will keep going! She has heart failure and is on multiple medications to keep her alive. I feel her quality of life is still okay. Every day is a bonus. That’s where we are. But sometimes I feel overwhelmed with sadness that she will leave us one day.

I wouldn’t put a dog down that is still having some quality of life and is relatively comfortable but the uncertainty is stressful so I can see why you find it hard to know.