Hate being a mum

[Hadenoughhhs]

Have one dc 18 months nearly. I hate it. Me and ex split a while ago so he has them usually sat afternoon to Sunday eve, though at my home as he’s too far away to take dc yet to his. Some weekends he works so it’s all on me. I have no annual leave to take until November. I’m fed up. Work full time. Don’t know how to entertain them anymore, everything seems so hard

I'd say 18month is a really tough stage op, it's such a common feeling for a lot of mums at that age. It won't last forever I promise xx

Have you considered post natal depression or just general depression? Might be worth speaking to your GP. Can you cut your hours and claim UC? Does your ex pay maintenance? Do you get any other support from other family or friends?

@InterestedinEfteling i have just about enough money but not enough to cut hours. I’m stuck

Yanbu, I absolutely hated the baby stage. Utter relentlessness of just needing to watch them all the time when you have so much other stuff to do, no downtime etc.
Can you get a babysitter for just a few hours?

Ok do you have any family or friends or his family and friends for support? Some respite time? Have you gone on the entitled to website and seen how much UC etc you'd get if you cut hours? Might be worth doing. Do you get sick pay through work if you got signed off sick for a couple of weeks?

Do you have anyone to take DC off your hands other than him? Grandparents etc. do you have mum friends to empathise with and have play dates? I'd recommend that.

It took me a long time to enjoy being a mum - actually as I'm writing that I think feeling pressure to enjoy it is a problem. You might enjoy brief fleeting moments like if they clap or giggle or splash in the bath. But you can't enjoy it all the time.

Plan some quality time at the weekend like swimming or taking them to the beach just the two of you. It's a relationship that needs nurturing. But also let yourself feel exhausted and be kind you yourself

18 months old are cute but it's not fun parenting them. I'd say my general life and weekends got 90 percent better when mine turned 5, but every year has got better than the last so is a gradual change. Mines now 6 and it's still hard work but so much easier and more enjoyable.

Oh OP- I totally relate. Working full time with an 18 month old as a single parent is beyond hideous. I spent lots of that period in tears.

Get them out and down the park as much as possible. Walk there if you can. This will be good for your mental health and will keep them occupied for ages. Even if it’s a really slow walk somewhere - they love exploring.