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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that the programme Ambulance doesn't show paramedics in a good light at all?

139 replies

LucyLaundry · 21/03/2024 14:40

I'm am very grateful for all emergency workers and the difficult pressures they are currently under is awful and it's certainly not a job I could do.

However, I'm shocked at the amount of intrusive questions (Asking elderly people why they never had children?) and the general gossiping about patients. I understand the need to pass on factual updates but some of the story sharing is wholly inappropriate.

I enjoy the programme but it's really opened my eyes, and not in a good way!

OP posts:
Dewdilly · 21/03/2024 18:40

LucyLaundry · 21/03/2024 15:41

I haven't said they don't do a good job, they absolutely do!

And completely agree that they aren't paid enough. None of our public sector workers ate and I fully support a raise for them all.

They have some extremely difficult cases to deal with and its frustrating to see the lack of resources they have.

I still think some of the 'chit chat' is inappropriate. I've seen a young female paramedic embarrass an older gentleman who had to be helped off the floor by suggesting he was cuddling her.

As I said in my OP, asking people why they didn't have children, reporting back to the dispatcher the patients anecdotes and personal situation (Oooh Barry and Helen have just celebrated their anniversary and had just come back from a cruise). Unnecessary.

I'm not criticising their dedication to the job, I'm saying they need extra training on appropriate small talk and passing on gossip.

I think these are plus points, not negatives.

Londonrach1 · 21/03/2024 18:40

Really I thought it showed his amazing they are. Yabu

ArcticOwl · 21/03/2024 18:41

PocketSand · 21/03/2024 17:15

I understand that chit chat and banter is partially diagnostic and to provide a wider picture but in my experience can be quite misleading where undiagnosed ND may be in play. I have 2 autistic DC and am probably autistic myself and didn't appreciate my response to ambulance transfer to hospital for one of them being questioned as abnormal. It was normal masking for me. But not emotional enough for them. Hence they fagged it.

i had that happen with a nurse doing the anaesthesia on my DD when she went in for surgery, it was commented how calm/collected i was, and that most parents were tearful/anxious when their kids were distressed, like i was somehow 'abnormal'

I politely pointed out she had an older brother with ASD and Anxiety and i was very practised at remaining calm but attentive under pressure and keeping my own emotions to myself when my children needed me to be strong.. and that i would return to her bed and decompress in privacy the way my own therapist had taught me.

Newuser75 · 21/03/2024 18:43

Toddlerteaplease · 21/03/2024 16:11

The ambulance program is very scripted, according to ex dispatchers on here. Apparently it's not usual to give a full update to control after every call. Only if something bad has happened. So I wouldn't worry about it.

Yes, I have friends and relations who are paramedics and they say that doesn't happen either. A lot of it is embellished for the tv.

Londonrach1 · 21/03/2024 18:43

Dewdilly · 21/03/2024 18:40

I think these are plus points, not negatives.

Show quote history

Me too...I'm NHS and I need to get someone to relax and trust you in seconds...you look for anything, the weather, children, whatever to get someone to relax ....then you can treat the medical situation...

Retrievemysanity · 21/03/2024 18:44

I’ve not watched it recently but I’ve watched it in the past and never felt anything other than admiration for them. Small talk and little jokes can really help someone who is frightened or in pain.

Original poster
LucyLaundry · 21/03/2024 18:45

Some people have deliberately misunderstood my post. Generally chatting with patients to distract them isn't what I mean.

Asking an elderly man why him and his deceased wife never had children is not OK!

OP posts:
fourelementary · 21/03/2024 18:46

I agree @LucyLaundry that they over share often and I think may of them seem to be in desperate need of counselling in order to stop playing out their issues in their job. FWIW not all emergency service workers are heroes. Many have hero complexes and are complete arseholes. Many are not patient centred and it’s all about their ego. Much like any job I guess…. Im a nurse and I can assure you they’re not all angels and lovely people either!!!

Itscatsallthewaydown · 21/03/2024 18:47

It always surprises me that people who have spent their whole career sitting in an office scratching their arse feel able to criticise those who are doing the proper jobs in society.

AlohaRose · 21/03/2024 18:47

I also didn't like the rubber duck earring the male call handler was wearing - I think its in slightly bad taste to be wearing novelty clothing while dealing with people who are in life or death situations.

That's your take-away from the programme? If wearing a novelty ear-ring is how they choose to express themselves during their shift I couldn't care less if they covered themselves in glitter and feathers. The callers can't see them and, even if they could, I doubt that would be their concern during an emergency situation.

likepebblesonabeach · 21/03/2024 18:51

LucyLaundry · 21/03/2024 18:45

Some people have deliberately misunderstood my post. Generally chatting with patients to distract them isn't what I mean.

Asking an elderly man why him and his deceased wife never had children is not OK!

@LucyLaundry and I'll ask again, you obviously don't think YABU so why ask the question?

1offnamechange · 21/03/2024 18:59

Oheighthundreddoubleohtensixtysix · 21/03/2024 15:17

I haven't seen the latest few series but it really opened my eyes to the sort of things they deal with.

I remember the episode where the female paramedic had to do a welfare check and she discovered the man's body after he hung himself.

Then the same paramedic had to deal with a young woman who was sadly killed by strong winds. On her next job she went to a patient who brought that up in conversation, and she just nodded.

I think the paramedics have to ask questions about their private life to build a connection and put them at ease. It makes the patient think of happier times.

I think the show is cheapened by the sob stories, and it infuriates me when they're called to a drunkard and they have to wait there for hours with them because they can't leave them alone.

I saw last night's and I although I appreciate its a nervous response, I thought it was unpleasant to see the female call handler smiling after taking the call from the women who was hiding from her abusive boyfriend. I also didn't like the rubber duck earring the male call handler was wearing - I think its in slightly bad taste to be wearing novelty clothing while dealing with people who are in life or death situations.

I'm sorry, what? Why on earth would the earrings someone wears in a NON CUSTOMER FACING ROLE make the slightest bit of difference in how they perform their job?
Did you escape from 1892 or something?
These jobs are already hard enough to recruit into because they're bloody hard, placing even more unnecessary restrictions on them because a random thinks that they can't be taking work seriously while wearing inappropriate earrings.
I deal with death and serious injury (albeit via email/telephone) daily in my job. Sometimes when I'm WFH I do so in my pyjamas, I've not noticed any difference with the sympathy I feel for the patients!

Bbq1 · 21/03/2024 19:04

Oheighthundreddoubleohtensixtysix · 21/03/2024 15:17

I haven't seen the latest few series but it really opened my eyes to the sort of things they deal with.

I remember the episode where the female paramedic had to do a welfare check and she discovered the man's body after he hung himself.

Then the same paramedic had to deal with a young woman who was sadly killed by strong winds. On her next job she went to a patient who brought that up in conversation, and she just nodded.

I think the paramedics have to ask questions about their private life to build a connection and put them at ease. It makes the patient think of happier times.

I think the show is cheapened by the sob stories, and it infuriates me when they're called to a drunkard and they have to wait there for hours with them because they can't leave them alone.

I saw last night's and I although I appreciate its a nervous response, I thought it was unpleasant to see the female call handler smiling after taking the call from the women who was hiding from her abusive boyfriend. I also didn't like the rubber duck earring the male call handler was wearing - I think its in slightly bad taste to be wearing novelty clothing while dealing with people who are in life or death situations.

We initially thought she was smiling but I think it was nerves and tbh just the shape of her mouth. She wasn't smiling about a woman being abused. As for the earring, so what? people being individuals and that's okay and it's not like callers can see the handler.

NeelyOHara1 · 21/03/2024 19:06

I'd guess the programme's producers probably have a big hand in what you're complaining about.

ButtockUp · 21/03/2024 19:16

Oheighthundreddoubleohtensixtysix · 21/03/2024 15:48

I think there's a genuine discussion to be had for the appalling bedside manner of some healthcare professionals (often nurses, dare I say it), but I don't really have those thiughts when watching Ambulance.

I agree.
Having spent many weeks visiting my mum, HCPs are utterly amazing, doctors/consultants are really lovely but nurses just don't seem to want to be there. Sorry nurses but that's what we've experienced.
They're too busy glued to screens but the HCPs do all the hands on work.

Mumof2NDers · 21/03/2024 19:24

LucyLaundry · 21/03/2024 18:45

Some people have deliberately misunderstood my post. Generally chatting with patients to distract them isn't what I mean.

Asking an elderly man why him and his deceased wife never had children is not OK!

i saw that episode and did think that question was a little inappropriate. I did think what if they couldn’t have kids and this was a source of pain for him.
Generally though I think they do an amazing job

Tortiemiaw · 21/03/2024 19:29

My dil is a paramedic. She's only been doing it a short while and has already been to a nationally reported hideous situation, having to be signed off for a few days.

She puts herself at risk every day and says the best bits are talking to the patients and showing interestinn their lives
It shows her as a compassionate and amazing lady - not a rude nosey Parker.
Seriously!!

purpleme12 · 21/03/2024 19:29

But when people are referring to the question why didn't you have any children? Aren't we referring the newer paramedic? She was described that way.
It was asked along with other questions.
I'm pretty sure that it was just because she was newer than the other paramedics on the show and didn't have as much experience. And that's how it came across

Tortiemiaw · 21/03/2024 19:31

Although, apparently, the cosy chats after call outs between paramedic and call handler never happen where she is!! They're too busy for that.

ScentOfSawdust · 21/03/2024 19:32

I’ve watched every episode (my daughter wants to be a paramedic). I have to admit that when they asked why that patient didn’t have children I did wince a bit, but that is the only time in 12 series that I’ve ever thought they’ve said or done anything remotely inappropriate.

And as for the previous poster saying it’s a whitewash job for the NHS, it’s nothing of the sort. There have been entire episodes focussing on its collapse; call handlers discussing the current terrible response times, paramedics stuck with patients for hours and hours when they’ve been unable to get appropriate mental health or social care support.
Paramedics and call handlers do an incredibly difficult job in incredibly difficult circumstances, and I think the programme does a good job at conveying that to the audience.

PaminaMozart · 21/03/2024 19:33

I'm puzzled.

Everyone is saying OP is unreasonable.

Which she clearly is.

And yet THIRTY percent, 30% voted that she is NOT unreasonable...??

HeadInTheSand0324 · 21/03/2024 19:35

LucyLaundry · 21/03/2024 15:41

I haven't said they don't do a good job, they absolutely do!

And completely agree that they aren't paid enough. None of our public sector workers ate and I fully support a raise for them all.

They have some extremely difficult cases to deal with and its frustrating to see the lack of resources they have.

I still think some of the 'chit chat' is inappropriate. I've seen a young female paramedic embarrass an older gentleman who had to be helped off the floor by suggesting he was cuddling her.

As I said in my OP, asking people why they didn't have children, reporting back to the dispatcher the patients anecdotes and personal situation (Oooh Barry and Helen have just celebrated their anniversary and had just come back from a cruise). Unnecessary.

I'm not criticising their dedication to the job, I'm saying they need extra training on appropriate small talk and passing on gossip.

You are being absolutely ridiculous.

As an NHS worker I find your posts very offensive.

Shmitz · 21/03/2024 19:36

LucyLaundry · 21/03/2024 18:45

Some people have deliberately misunderstood my post. Generally chatting with patients to distract them isn't what I mean.

Asking an elderly man why him and his deceased wife never had children is not OK!

Apologies op, you're right. It wasn't deliberate but I don't think I understood you properly. It is an intrusive question, yes. The chatting is fine, intrusive questions are not.

Stressedoutforever · 21/03/2024 19:54

DH is a senior paramedic and has seen so much over the last 10 years- he's been doing overtime so worked 72 hours last week- yes they talk about patients and will gossip a bit. Just like anyone working in a shop would about customers?

They have to think of something to say to each other when they sit there for 12 hours a day!

swimlyn · 21/03/2024 19:56

Well, recently I saw one of them call a lady “love” instead of addressing her by her full correct name. I was appalled. Politeness costs nothing.

As for the use of “darling” and “duck”, I can’t believe they keep their jobs when they are so offhand with tax paying customers.

What the hell is going on?