To not take my children out?

[Applescruffle]

My kids are 6 and 10. I can't drive, despite trying for over 10 years. I just can't do it.

My eldest says that all his friends get to go out every weekend, whenever they feel like it, for lots of walks and stuff because their mums drive. And that he has boring weekends because I can't.
I don't think this is quite true, on Friday evening he had a friend stay overnight for a sleepover and they had lots of fun. I cooked their favourite meal and bought them snacks. Then when the friend went home on Saturday morning, my husband and I took them both out to the beach where we looked for crabs and built a small sandcastle, then we went to the park. 10yo then mowed the lawn and was given money for doing this which he was able to spend online, which kept him occupied on his games. I played paw patrol games with the youngest for the rest or the afternoon, or she had the option of helping daddy in the garden.
Today husband is working. I am tired. I work all week as well as do the school runs, and my share of housework and cooking. They want to go to a park that has a pond full of frogspawn to collect some to put in our pond. I said we maybe could this afternoon but now I just don't want to. I didn't think about it being Sunday, buses are very few abd don't go directly to the park, meaning we would have to walk 20 minutes uphill from the town centre. I can't leave when we want because I'd have to wait for the bus, which might not even turn up. It's cold and wet and miserable and my house is nice and warm and I have a good book on the go and laundry to do. If I could jump in a car, take them there and collect some then go home, I would. But I cant. Even if it was a sunny day, I probably would. But it's not. Plus 6yo will be a nightmare when it's time to leave.

So I've told them we can go tomorrow after school when there's more buses and they go directly to the park.
I just feel so guilty and inadequete. They act so disappointed and I feel so bad about not being able to drive them around like the other mums.

But should I feel guilty? They do go out, they do get stuff to do. They get love and attention. They've got plenty of toys, games, activities and a big garden at home.

Is it normal for kids to have their whole weekends filled with stuff to do? How much do you expect them to entertain themselves? And how often do you take them out?
Would you have sucked it up and taken them today? Or told them to find something to do at home themselves because I deserve a weekend of my own? Is 6 and 10 reasonable ages to not be entertained by me all day?

I think children just love a whinge about something.

FWIW I didn't say we could go and thrn changed my mind. I said maybe.

you are allowed to say maybe, and not go out if you don't feel up to it.

Kids always whinge about something!

My parents didn't feel the need to keep me entertained all weekend - we took the dog for long walks and when we lived in London my dad would take us to the free museums while my mum worked (nurse in shifts), but quite often we were at home, reading, listening to music, drawing, and generally entertaining ourselves.
My parents often had to do the big supermarket shop or diy at the weekends and we just had to go with them and put up with the boredom - they certainly didn't feel bad about not constantly actively entertaining us.

One of my DC said, when little, ‘maybe/possibly mean no don’t they’! She is now the mum of a 5 year old and fills her weekends doing things with him, inside and outside the house. Some children/people always want to be busy, others are happy to stay home and play/read. There isn’t really a right or wrong, but sometimes you can get a burst of energy from going out that you didn’t think you had, if you know what I mean!

Agreed with a lot of posters on here. It's important kids get chilled, unstructured time at home too..even if they don't want it! Like us, they also need some r n r from the business of life! You sound like you are doing great and helping them have a really nice balance of activities and 'free' time at the weekends. X

Why not although a decisive yes or no is always better but sometimes a maybe or we will see is fine.

You sound like a fab mum OP. Kids love to moan and complain. They also need to learn that every day isn't a party and that grown ups need to do house jobs and have some less full on time. Throw some cooking ingredients their way and tell them they can make a cake if they want something to do. That'll create a shot ton of cleaning up though. 😬😂

With children, aaallll their friends always have a much better life. They get to do lots, have lots of sweets, whatever they want to eat, late bedtimes, all the latest clothes and expensive gadgets.

@Applescruffle why did your hubby not take them for frog spawn then while you made the tea??

This just shows how important driving can be. The world is a lot smaller without it.

The world is only smaller if you let it be

It's not ideal to take frogspawn from another pond. There may be a reason why your pond hasn't supported spawn this year (change in pond or change in surrounding habitat) You risk spreading disease and technically you need landowners permission to remove it.

I feel your pain. No spawn in my pond either but you aren't actually entitled to go and get spawn from elsewhere.

Sounds like a perfectly busy enough weekend. I'm another one who tried to drive for years OP and had to throw the towel in eventually due to cost. I'm autistic which affects my motor skills and also have an anxiety disorder which I just couldnt cope with in the driving tests, of which I failed 3.

We are lucky though that we live in walking distance to loads of things to entertain the kids and have good local bus routes too.

As I said in my OP, he's working today.