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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can he do this?

27 replies

Snoozysue21 · 16/03/2024 14:40

Hi all I'm looking to see if anyone can help with this situation hopefully someone legally trained or someone who has been through similar
Soon to be EXH moved out a year ago
Under our financial agreement he doesn't give me maintenance for our children but pays the mortgage.
Today I've opened a letter mistakenly that has been sent here addressed to him. He never gets mail here so didn't even check the name and just opened it.
It contained an approval for a credit card that he has leveraged against the house. It appears to be one that builds credit score with a really high APR. The house is jointly owned and he hasn't consulted me , does he have to or not due to the fact we are divorcing?
My other worry is that if he defaults on payments would that make me liable or if bailiffs came to the house could they take my things ? He's terrible with money so I'm pretty concerned.
Can anyone shed any light ?
TIA

OP posts:
MassageForLife · 16/03/2024 14:46

What credit card is it? I've never heard of one that's secured on a house before. Mortgages and some loans, yes.

Any debt on the credit card will be his responsibility. If he defaults, baliffs shouldn't be able to take anything of yours.

I would be tempted to reseal the letter, write on it - return to sender, not at this address, and post it back.

Original poster
Snoozysue21 · 16/03/2024 14:51

Its an offshoot of Capital One for people with not great credit ratings and he's been approved based on the fact he's a property owner

OP posts:
StedeBonnet · 16/03/2024 14:58

It won't be secured by a charge on the property though. You'd need to agree to that. He is a property owner so if he's told them that's his status that's correct. You won't be liable for the debt.

Haggisfish3 · 16/03/2024 15:01

Are you sure she won’t be? I would contact them to check. I would have thought if it’s secured against house they could chase it. Him still paying mortgage and being crap
wiht money would concern me greatly op.

StedeBonnet · 16/03/2024 15:06

Haggisfish3 · 16/03/2024 15:01

Are you sure she won’t be? I would contact them to check. I would have thought if it’s secured against house they could chase it. Him still paying mortgage and being crap
wiht money would concern me greatly op.

A credit card won't be secured on the property and even if it was secured loan as it's a joint property OP would need to agree to a second charge being placed on the property. I think it's a misunderstanding about what he's applied for.

Scaffoldingisugly · 16/03/2024 15:07

Bin the letter and deny all knowledge.. A small win surely?

Original poster
Snoozysue21 · 16/03/2024 15:40

Lol @Scaffoldingisugly it had crossed my mind 😂

OP posts:
SpringySpringTime · 16/03/2024 15:48

It won’t be secured against the house, he has stated in his application that he is a homeowner which is correct. He’s done nothing wrong and this doesn’t impact you financially.

Original poster
Snoozysue21 · 16/03/2024 15:48

I think basically he has shown affordability by paying the mortgage. I'm not sure if being a home owner stands you a better chance or not but on the application they reference if the home is owned or not.

OP posts:
Geebray · 16/03/2024 15:49

He's a homeowner, they sent the paperwork to his house.

Original poster
Snoozysue21 · 16/03/2024 15:52

He doesn't live here anymore so technically its not legally it's half his

OP posts:
RandomMess · 16/03/2024 15:53

You can end up with credit cards leveraged against property. BIL did this behind SILs back, he was literally gambling their house away.

RandomMess · 16/03/2024 15:54

Return everything "not at this address"

Mumof2teens79 · 16/03/2024 15:59

My guess would be if its secured against the house you as joint owner should be consulted.
But if there is a mortgage on the house you can't secure another loan against it can you?

And if he doesn't live there they can't take your stuff.

But, my concern would be if he has such bad credit it's more likely he won't pay the mortgage....and then the bank will reposses the house unless you make the payments up.
And if he is paying the mortgage direct rather than buying you out or giving you maintenance will you know that he is making the payments or might you only find out too late that he is not?

I would send the letter back return to sender, does NOT live at this address.

Original poster
Snoozysue21 · 16/03/2024 16:30

I think the returning the card when it comes is an option .

OP posts:
Sprinkles211 · 16/03/2024 18:23

Definitely return to sender not known at this address

Haggisfish3 · 17/03/2024 11:35

Snoozysue21 · 16/03/2024 15:52

He doesn't live here anymore so technically its not legally it's half his

if his name is on a joint mortgage with yours, it doesn’t matter if he lives there or not-he still owns half of the house. If you sign up to Experian you can see loan applications and credit searches that have been done for you and anyone financially connected to you-it will show credit searches run in your ex’s name. I found out my exdh had taken out a loan recently via this method.

Scarletttulips · 17/03/2024 11:38

He would’ve got the card and needed to show a ID and address - he’s lied about where he lives and used the mortgage statement to get it sent to you house.

Send the letter back before the card comes.

opentoadvice88 · 17/03/2024 11:41

Return to sender along with the follow on card. Its factual.

It might he half his property but it’s not his home & he shouldn’t lie to Capital One.

Scarletttulips · 17/03/2024 11:45

Yes they need to know where they are physically living -

redalex261 · 17/03/2024 11:45

I would contact card provider and explain he doesn't live there. He cannot attach credit card to property as far as i am aware however I would be insisting amount paid for mortgage goes direct to your bank account snd you pay mortgage. He is unreliable and you can’t afford fuckery with housing costs. Also, if he defaults/late with mortgage payment affects your credit rating ad joint mortgage surely.

Bubblegummies · 17/03/2024 11:56

Why does he pay the mortgage and not give you maintenance which you use to pay the mortgage?

if he isn’t on the mortgage anymore seems a strange way to do it

Willyoujustbequiet · 17/03/2024 16:19

When you say financial agreement what do you mean?

Legally he is liable for the mortgage ( if named on it) and child support. It's not one or the other.

Original poster
Snoozysue21 · 17/03/2024 16:22

Hi all thanks for the replies to answer a few questions.
He is still on the mortgage as I cannot afford to buy him out and as I'm a full time student and only work part time they won't consider me to be the full owner as I've already looked into it.
I did contact child maintenance but any money I would get they take into consideration he pays the mortgage therefore I wouldn't be eligible for anything,the mortgage is less than 500 pounds but he only had to pay me 370 per month meaning I would of had to pay the rest myself which on top of everything else at the moment I couldn't afford to do. This is why he just pays the mortgage.

OP posts:
AdoraBell · 17/03/2024 16:26

I would contact the credit card company and say he doesn’t live there, he’s knowingly given the wrong address.

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