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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if 16th's are still a thing anymore?

67 replies

WillYouPutYourCoatOn · 15/03/2024 07:29

Just that really. DS will be 16 this summer? Is this a big deal anymore? I know some Americans go daft for it on TV, but here, 18 (and 21?) is more of the "big" one right?

All DH and I have as reference is us and our mates turning 16, 20yrs ago, and it wasn't really a thing then. So I'd like to know what people's experience of this in the last three years is please?

So, AIBU to ask if your DC/their friends turned 16 in the last three years, what presents did they get and what party/activity happened, if anything?

Thank you.

OP posts:
WaitingForMojo · 15/03/2024 07:31

I see 16 as ‘big’. Definitely more so than 21, which doesn’t mean anything any more. I took ds away for his 16th. Didn’t get him any meaningful presents, the trip was the present. Plan to do the same with each dc as they turn 16.

DysmalRadius · 15/03/2024 07:32

Thought this was going to be about buying weed... 😁

YogaBare · 15/03/2024 07:33

Anyone else think this was about weed 😂

YogaBare · 15/03/2024 07:33

Oops double posted

Pottedpalm · 15/03/2024 07:36

😂I thought it was going to be about measuring… 1/4s..1/8s..1/16

blibblibs · 15/03/2024 07:36

DS was 16 earlier this year, he came home from a school trip on his birthday. He got a few presents, things he wanted that we deemed to expensive to just randomly buy and we set something up in the house that he really wanted at minimal cost.
So nothing special but he was really pleased.

chocolateisavegetable · 15/03/2024 07:37

We went all out for their 18th, but weren’t prepared to go big for their 16th and 21st as well. 21st is bigger in the US because in many states that’s when they can legally buy alcohol (unless changed since ours were that age!)

Gazelda · 15/03/2024 07:38

DD was 16 recently. She got a smart watch and we went out for dinner.
Most cards had a '16' on them but that was about the extend of the difference to other birthdays.

Ridingthegravytrain · 15/03/2024 07:40

Haha yes it's been a long time since I heard someone say they had a 'teenth

mn29 · 15/03/2024 07:43

‘Still’ a thing - I’d say 16ths are more of a thing now than when I was a teen in the 90s. Like all American imports they have become more of big deal here in recent years- baby showers, pumpkin picking etc.

My child turned 16 this year, they had a relatively big party which they haven’t done previously but presents and everything else were the same as any other birthday. Personally I still see 18th as the big/special one as that’s when they become an adult. Obviously lots of their friends have recently turned 16 as well and apart from an increase in parties it doesn’t seem a big deal. I think the party thing is just because they’re the age for it now, rather than 16th birthdays being special.

WaitingForMojo · 15/03/2024 07:46

I guess I see 16 as when they become ‘young person’ and not ‘child’. It seems like the becoming an adult is more graduated now rather than gaining adult rights at 18. With 16 year olds getting the vote in some parts of the U.K., age of consent being 16, etc. having the right to consent to medical treatment, leave school, etc

Timeforabiscuit · 15/03/2024 07:46

No - not a big thing going my daughter's peers - although the number of weekend home parties with alcohol stepped up for her year group.

Timeforabiscuit · 15/03/2024 07:47

Would say that the end of GCSE prom event is a much bigger deal, with formal dress etc.

TeenDivided · 15/03/2024 07:49

Timeforabiscuit · 15/03/2024 07:47

Would say that the end of GCSE prom event is a much bigger deal, with formal dress etc.

DD's 16th coincided with prom time so it worked well to have her 16th as a big thing.
(Which was lucky as our relationship was not in a good place by the time her 18th rolled around.)

Longma · 15/03/2024 07:51

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines. at the request of it's author.

WhamBamThankU · 15/03/2024 07:54

My DS had a party at a lovely venue with food, '16' balloons everywhere, cake, dj and karaoke. We also got some of those instant print cameras and a pin board to put the photos on. He's got some great memories to look back on now.

TheChosenTwo · 15/03/2024 08:13

We did have 16th parties but just home ones for our girls, mostly family and they had some friends. Mind you we do this for all birthdays 😂

MrsWhattery · 15/03/2024 08:23

😂I thought it was going to be about measuring… 1/4s..1/8s..1/16

Me too. Not even weed - just fractions!

Original poster
WillYouPutYourCoatOn · 15/03/2024 08:46

So typically in our family on 18 you get a car. I don't mean a new Range, we're not the Kardashians. A small, safe, pootle about just passed your test thing. Old fiesta etc.

So 16th is nowhere near this? We thought maybe a £500 item? Is this about where other people pitch it? I just don't want him to either look like a poor relation amongst his peers, or like a flash harry with an over the top present.

OP posts:
x2boys · 15/03/2024 08:52

WillYouPutYourCoatOn · 15/03/2024 08:46

So typically in our family on 18 you get a car. I don't mean a new Range, we're not the Kardashians. A small, safe, pootle about just passed your test thing. Old fiesta etc.

So 16th is nowhere near this? We thought maybe a £500 item? Is this about where other people pitch it? I just don't want him to either look like a poor relation amongst his peers, or like a flash harry with an over the top present.

Lots of families wouldn't be able to afford a car for an 18th
And £500 is a huge amount of money for a 16th birthday IMO
My son is 17 now but has a boxing day birthday so it's already an expensive time of the year
I don't personally think 16 th birthday is that big a deal .

Beezknees · 15/03/2024 08:52

£500? Jesus christ. No one I know has that kind of money to spend on a 16th!

DS turned 16 last month. He didn't have a party as he didn't want one, he's quiet and introverted. I got him some new bits for his PC as that's what he asked for, but he doesn't like a big fuss. Depends on the individual child, if he'd wanted a party I'd have organised one.

SilverSimca · 15/03/2024 08:54

DS was 16 last October, it wasn’t a big thing - I can’t even remember what he did, maybe an escape room? - and none of his friends turning 16 has been a big thing either. Def no parties.

SilverSimca · 15/03/2024 08:56

And we definitely didn’t spend £500 on his present! I think it was a desk chair he wanted.

TheChosenTwo · 15/03/2024 09:03

@WillYouPutYourCoatOn we did £500 in cash for 16th to buy something special (one got a camera and the other chose some jewellery) and a car and driving lessons for 17th, lots of my peers had similar when I was that age (I didn’t though).

mn29 · 15/03/2024 09:07

WillYouPutYourCoatOn · 15/03/2024 08:46

So typically in our family on 18 you get a car. I don't mean a new Range, we're not the Kardashians. A small, safe, pootle about just passed your test thing. Old fiesta etc.

So 16th is nowhere near this? We thought maybe a £500 item? Is this about where other people pitch it? I just don't want him to either look like a poor relation amongst his peers, or like a flash harry with an over the top present.

Surely at this point in the school year half of his year group have already turned 16 so you’ll have a good idea whether he’s going to look like a poor relation or a flash Harry to his peers? Although that shouldn’t matter. I’m close to my 16yo, we often talk about what’s going on with peers etc and I’ve not heard about any big/expensive presents (we are in an affluent, middle class area, for context).