Red Flag??

[blubberfuzz]

Is it a red flag for someone to tell you they love you 4 days after meeting them? We are both in our late 50's so not young and naive?

I'm sorry but yes to me this seems absolutely bonkers

Yes!! Run!

You can't even know someone after 4 days.

Yep.
Love bomber

’What are the red flags of love bombers?
moving the relationship along more quickly than you expected – saying “I love you” very early on, wanting to make things “official” straight away, or making plans to move in together. talking about how they know you're “the one”, your relationship was “predestined”, or how they want to skip to the “real” relationship.’

Yes it is.

Red flag!

Yes!!!

Do you feel the same though? If I'd run away when a man told me he loved me before we even had a date or kissed I wouldn't have been blissfully happy with him these past 22 years! Maybe he feels why waste time if he has such strong feelings. Maybe he's a great guy.

Of course it is. Would you tell a stranger you loved them?

Hell ya it is!

Maybe you're a wonderful woman and he is helpless against his feelings for you. Maybe people saying Red Flag have never felt fast and furious passion. The phrase love at first sight came about because it is a real phenomenon!

Yes - for me. Even if I felt that electric 'This is the one' attraction, I would keep to myself and assume he would do the same.

Yes, red flag. Run.

My friend went on a date and the first date he said he loved her. 6 weeks later, he moved in with her.

He was already married but 'getting a divorce'. They're still living together 6 years later, she wants to marry him but the divorce is 'still going through'.

I mean, yes, it is a red flag, but if that's the only thing so far, for me, it doesn't have to mean the end of the relationship.

I've not had anyone say it after 4 days, but when I've had partners who've said it sooner than I think is reasonable (like, less than 3 months absolute minimum), I have literally said to them "No, you don't, you couldn't possibly, you don't know me well enough yet. But I'm enjoying getting to know you and maybe it'll develop in time."

And then, for me, it's settled down and some of those have gone on to be lovely, multi-year long term relationships.
But it does make me look harder for other signs, and if someone was showing any other signs of love bombing or rushing or controlling, then yes, I would be very wary.

Spot on, KitKat

Yes - it’s ridiculous.