To think I’m really bad at business?

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DH and I own a small successful business. We advertised recently for help from someone 16+. We felt ideally a sixth former would be best as the work is using a phone / technical but nothing beyond admin. We, of course, were happy with any age (above 16 for insurance) applying.

We did mainly get sixth formers due to where we advertised. We pay way above the NMW for a 25+ year old (3 x NMW for 16) and so we obviously got a lot of interest. Some mum’s sent in a request on behalf of their kids which we immediately ignored. We ended up choosing 3 candidates who used foresight to actually send a CV and who stipulated they’d be available for the times we needed them (ad hoc work, chance for more though). 2 boys and 1 girl. The girl didn’t respond about interview, so we held interviews with two boys: James and John.

On paper, John stood out. Very articulate, professional and keen. James was also good on paper but his emails included emojis and didn’t come across as well. We were convinced John would be who we hired.

Interview rolled around and James was great - nothing special as he is still a kid, but he was talkative enough, seemed capable and had a good working background. John was fine but didn’t talk much, not in a shy way but in a lacking interpersonal skills way.

James would get the job. Anyway, John later followed up to say how much he enjoyed learning about the business and was excited to hopefully begin with us. We feel so guilty. He’s a good kid but James was better. I know it’s life and John plans to go to Oxbridge, his interviewing skills would see him get slaughtered in that scenario, but I don’t know how to respond?!

I am now thinking how we could hire both. But it’s not feasible.

How would you handle this? Am I just not the right personality to run a business?

You just say unfortunately you had a stronger candidate and give some honest but kind reasons as to what the differences were. No need to overthink this!

Maybe say it was great to meet you but sadly this time the job went to someone who you felt was a slightly better fit. That you thought his CV was great and you wish him the best in the future, thank you etc etc.

Simple and to the point!

Think John had a lot of help with the on paper/follow up.

You don't hire both.

Not unless you need both anyway.

Oxbridge interviews are very different from business interviews. They are more like a group of nerds geeking out about an academic subject. Interpersonal skills are not a particularly high priority.

Ah, you’re lovely! You have to say, you were a really strong candidate, we liked …… about you, but we had several excellent applicants and unfortunately on this occasion you were not successful. We wish you every success in the future.

Mummy and Daddy did the writing for John. James likely did most himself. I’d chose James.

I recently had something somewhat similar, person A filled a skills gap we had, person B had a shining personality that we absolutely needed. I informed person B that on this occasion she had just been pipped to the post but I would love to keep in touch for any future vacancies. She now thankfully also works for me so I didn’t miss out, I contacted her 5/6 months after her initial application when we had another vacancy and she was still just as keen to join.

I went to Cambridge - he won’t even be able to answer eloquently - lots of “erm and stuff like that”

I'm wondering if people really are right here about John getting lots of help on paper…

You don't have to be an Alan Sugar type bully to be good at business. But you do have to make tough decisions that may not pay off.

With all respect, this job is going to be the tiniest blip in these boys careers, it really doesn't matter which one you go with.

Mummy and Daddy did the writing for John.

So uncalled for and actually a pretty horrible thing to say. Maybe he just feels more comfortable writing than he does face to face. Interviews are daunting for most people let alone 16yr olds who have no idea what to expect.

There's just no need for such derision.

It was possibly his first interview- in which case I’d be careful not to flatten any confidence he does have.

I think it’s fair to say to him that he did brilliantly in a field of lots of excellent candidates but he was pipped at the post. And that you’d like to keep him in mind if any future posts come up.

maybe suggest some verbal feedback on his interview? Your advice might come across as more positive if it’s an informal chat. It may also give him a chance to be more relaxed so you can see how much was interview nerves.

He’s a good and very smart kid - straight 9s at GCSE. You can’t argue he’s intelligent. The issue is the job is in our home office, he’d have to deal with being around us and communicating with parents, too. It’s just not the best fit - I wouldn’t mind if we didn’t have James who was great - I’d be happy with John. James also had straight 9s from a worse school which was also mixed, I think being in a more sociable environment and not a “posh” school, helped develop those interpersonal skills.

I just wish we never tried to hire someone now because I hate this feeling. I am just not cut out for the tough stuff when people are nice.

However, PP is right - he won’t even remember this job in a few weeks 😂