Owe dh a lie in because I had one Mother’s Day

[dhtakinghtepiss]

So I had a 2 hour lie in on Mother’s Day. Yesterday and today dh has refused to get out of the bed (3 young kids) because I had extra sleep on Sunday so he can now. wtf. Father’s Day he can forget it. Aibu???

My ex was very transactional and controlling like this. Better off without

I’m sorry to hear this has happened. You’re not being unreasonable and this doesn’t sound like a nice way to live.

Trying to get on a “let’s fix this” kind of wavelength… is it possible he’s being unreasonably petty about this particular little thing because of a wider issue between you- perhaps about how childcare is split in general, or how you communicate about it or arrange it in the first place, or how he’s made to feel “appreciated” for his input? This terrible, petty behaviour might be his way of making a protest about something he feels wronged by. (Not to say he has been wronged, just trying to work out where this nonsense could be coming from).

Maybe try to talk to him to find out. It’s good to try to understand what on earth he’s playing at and how you can avoid him doing it again? I assume it is otherwise a happy-ish marriage and you’d just like to get rid of this little chapter of bad! Good luck, OP.

My thoughts exactly major ick coming from this little boy !! My guess is he's an absolute twat the rest of the time aswell how she's managed to muster up the strength to sleep with this guy 3 times let alone have 3 children with him is an utter mystery because my libido would of upped and fkd off a long time ago

My god, I do wonder why people actually have children. Relationships seem to go down the drain and people forget why they are actually together.

Has he always been like this with the tit for tat nonsense?
They have 3 dc, bit late to comment on why anyone would do that. But if he's always been like it, I would have def stopped at one and become a single parent.
Rather think OP won't be back to reply after the general response on here.
Hopefully she's giving him a verbal boot up the 'arris.

That really gave me the ick.

Do any of you ever think “who TF did I marry” when you have to ask questions like this? 😅 He is unreasonable; childish. And just plain weird to have that attitude unless he does everything all the time.

He's actually vile. I don't understand how there are husbands like this. Does he not like you?! It's just cruel, nasty behaviour. My abusive ex used to do stuff like this so I'm really annoyed for you. He'd do 1 small nice thing for me then say I owed him now and basically punish me for it.

Like she's not aware?

UANBU and your husband sounds horrible.

Tell him to stop being childish and grow up. Tell him to stop the point scoring because life's too short.

My ex was like this and it was awful. Everything was a bloody transaction. You constantly thought about thither you'd done enough to balance out what he'd done, or feel guilty if not or even if they were. It's exhausting and no way to live. You are constantly worrying that what your doing is being monitored and tracked to make sure it enough.

Lie-ins shouldn't be a once a year thing. We always get either Saturday or Sunday each unless there's an early start for everyone happening. We alternate each weekend who gets Saturday and who gets Sunday because Sunday gets to be longer. It's really fucked up if Mother's Day is the only lie-in you get.

Have you told him that he gets his Father’s Day? If just here moaning and haven’t said anything to him then yea you are BU. As if anyone would allow this fgs

this is totally ridiculous.

As I've said before. We end up with some princes....
Tell him to get his arse up and help you. But if you can manage getting three kids up yourself maybe you don't need that fourth one 😉

I remember the days of lie in battles. I used to have a Saturday and dh a Sunday. Oh the arguments if one of us felt short changed. 3 young kids are hard

If you're not already doing so, draw up a full list of mental load and running a house / family and split it with him 50/50.

If he's not willing to pick up the 50%, then compromise by letting him take on only his stuff. To include all his washing, ironing, cooking, shopping, meal planning, cleaning, clearing up after himself, lifemin, and everything else.

We alternate a lay in every weekend because life. Sleep, scroll on your phone, watch telly, do whatever you want that bit of time. To give you more on Mother’s Day and then take it away (essentially) means he gave you nothing at all.
and for the record, me and my Mum friends did a spa morning on Mother’s Day. Arranged by our husbands. X

This is how relationships die

OP deserves WAY better than this deadbeat! The bar is so low, it's on the floor!

Yikes 😟